I was at work earlier today where I officiate soccer for kids between the ages of 3-15 and I had an altercation with a parent. Those of you who have ever played in one of these leagues when you were younger or have kids that participate in them understand that some parents take the game a little too serious.
I was reffing this game just as I would with any other and everything is going smoothly. As the game is nearing halftime, I hear this parent who is trying to act like a coach for his daughter's team starts yelling at everyone and telling them what to do. He then starts yelling for me to blow my whistle so the kids know when the ball is in play and when it is not. His next words after that were "this ref sucks". I clearly heard him and laughed it off because it's to me he was just some butthurt parent taking the game too seriously and it was really no big deal. I call for halftime and he comes up to me and tries to tell me how to do my job and I thanked him for the advice and I told him that I did not appreicate what he said about me earlier. He then said, "I don't give a fuck about what you heard me say". Mind you, there are about 25 little kids + other parents there and he is just saying this casually. He was just trying to be a tough guy and prove that he was "the man" (This guy was at least 40+ and I'm more than likely half his age, if not more; real mature). I nodded my head at him and proceeded to walk to my boss to tell him about the situation.
As I'm walking, the parent exclaims that he will be following me to my boss and I just ignore him and continue to maintain my frame. I reach some of my other coworkers and I ask where my boss was and he interrupts me mid sentence and says, "Are you going to cry like a little baby now?" and "Are you some sort of pussy?". Silence once again (wasn't even looking at him). They told me where my boss was and I walked over to him with this guy still talking shit to my ear. He heard not one syllable from me. We reach my boss and all of a sudden the parent then goes into bitch mode and starts apologizing to me in front of my boss frantically and starts saying that he was out of line. I hadn't even started explaining what happened and this dude was already trying to say sorry. He explained to my boss what happened and my boss told him simply that his employees are not to be disrespected and treated like that. The parent walked away and I explained to my boss what had happened and he said that he was really appreciative that I held my ground and didn't say or do anything stupid that could have led to my dismissal. He thanked me by giving me a 30% raise from what he normally gives me ( I don't make much so 30% isn't a lot but I'll take it).
Even though this isn't the usual post about maintaining frame, it really fucking works. I just saw a wannabe alpha try the fuck out of me and then as soon as shit is about to hit the fan for him he starts to apologize. It's one thing to read and discuss about Alpha's and Beta's in the world, but it's another thing to witness the difference first hand. I'm happy I maintained frame and I was able to break down that asshole without saying anything. Have a great weekend.
[–]Davidkpa 67 points68 points69 points (13 children) | Copy Link
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