My Not-Drinking Problem

fidelity_ · 2017-01-13T18:10:28+00:00

Recovering alcoholic who is 5 years sober now. Dude this is how it starts. Also you don't need substances, I don't even like bars and my day game is 100x better because people's guards are down. You don't need it. This is a dark start to a very dark path.

RedditAdminsSuck_88 · 2017-01-13T17:36:44+00:00

So you are admitting you need a crutch to function.

Its like the hamsters on AskTRP when I tell them to stop smoking weed. "Yeah but women love weed! I use it to help me get women!"

So you are admitting you need a crutch to succeed with women.

NeoreactionSafe · 2017-01-13T17:50:41+00:00

Once a week.
Once a week.
Once a week.

If you drink more than once a week it's too much.

Just keep it to a limited part of your life and it's fine.

The concept of all forms of "getting high" is to break your routine mode.

Alcohol all the time will just make you tired and overweight.

IGoYouStayTwoAutumns · 2017-01-14T00:31:45+00:00

6+ years sober here, I've written quite a bit on TRP re: drinking and dating etc. I'm also writing a book right now called 5 YEARS OF SOBER DATING IN NEW YORK AND LA (all about quitting drinking and then dating in recovery), so yeah, this is very much in my wheelhouse.

Here's the deal: you may not be hooked yet, but you will be soon enough. Everyone's addiction threshold is different, but if you maintain a constant buzz on a daily basis you'll move from "functioning" alcoholic to "non-functioning" alcoholic in fairly short order.

Yes, it IS easier to daygame (and nightgame, and any kind of game) when you have that nice amazing buzz going on. You feel unstoppable. King of the world. Al Pacino (now sober) said "There's no better feeling in the world than that feeling between the 2nd martini and the 3rd martini." Totally agree. You feel invincible. The hero of your own movie. Picking up women? It's like snapping your fingers (particularly if she's buzzed as well, then it's just effortless).

Thing is though, there's no such thing as a free ride. You have to pay the piper eventually. You think you're having the time of your life, but the sober people around you are likely looking on going "Hah hah, wow, check that guy out. What a wreck. What a loser. What a mess." You get a few drinks in and start hitting on that cute girl, and us sober guys sitting a few tables down are watching like: "Check it out!! The drunk slob is trying to pick up the fattie, and he doesn't even realize...!!" Believe me, I know, I've spent plenty of time on both sides of that fence. Your "I'm just buzzed!" is often everyone else's "Wow, that guy's WASTED..."

The drunk dreamworld can be a blast, yes. It's a great time. But it's VERY misleading. You think you're making headway, but you're not. You think you're connecting with someone, but you're not. You think you've bagged an amazing woman, but you haven't. You think your life is going somewhere, but it isn't.

Alcohol in seduction is like training wheels, it can be extremely useful (at first) when it comes to getting you out of your shell, up and on your feet, out there, moving around, mingling, socializing, cold approaching. God knows it helped me (a very shy, introverted teen) get into my first few relationships. But eventually you have to take the training wheels off, and do it for real. Leave the dream world behind, leave the buzz behind, and do it stone cold sober. Otherwise you'll never understand what a solid, real, authentic connection actually looks and feels like.

When I was in your exact position years ago I thought I'd NEVER give up drinking. I discovered booze at 19 at and went pretty hard for 15 years (quit at 34, I'm 40 now). I definitely had a lot of great times for sure. But eventually I had to quit. Eventually you realize it's all fake, it's all reruns. Your life is going nowhere fast. That, and you just can't take the hangovers anymore.

If I could do it all over again I would have quit sooner, much sooner. Every alcoholic says the exact same thing. Oh, and here's the big takeway (re: sexual strategy etc, why we're all here): the sooner you quit and learn to game sober, the sooner the quality of the women you're with will increase drastically. Trust me on this one. Girls you think are hot shit now, you're won't glance at them twice once you've got a year or more of sobriety under your belt. Your friendships will get better, your women will get better, everything will get better.

But hey, if someone told me all of this while I was living buzzed and having the time of my life I would have totally blown this off too, so maybe my advice is falling on deaf ears. All I will say is: I've been where you are now, many of us have been there, and we all agree that while it was fun for a bit, it got very bad very quickly (as they say: first it was fun, then it was fun with problems, then it was just problems). The sooner you get out the sooner you can actually start the rest of your life (and, if you like, start learning Game for real).

GroundhogLiberator · 2017-01-13T19:34:35+00:00

If you allow something to become a crutch in a small part of your life, it's only a matter if time until it becomes a crutch in your daily life.

If you don't cut back on the drinking, soon you won't be able to get through the workday without a beer.

psychonauticusURSUS · 2017-01-13T17:16:04+00:00

Honestly you're handicapping yourself both physically and mentally/emotionally.

Recognizing you're better at social interactions when buzzed should force you to work on yourself to be better socially when sober instead of just saying 'well I'm just going to be buzzed all the time'.

Gaming when you're sober and girls are drunk is beyond easy. It's a huge advantage.

Also, alcohol increases estrogen pretty dramatically, especially the hops from beer. It also lowers test. When your body is busy trying to process alcohol it cannot burn fat or build muscle. So on the physical side you're handicapping yourself pretty dramatically.

IMHO you're doing it all wrong. Quit the booze, improve yourself. Profit.

Stythe · 2017-01-14T17:58:25+00:00

This is a train wreck waiting to happen. Everyone is warning you yet you're ignoring it. Low level drinking gets higher as you go bud. What starts as 1 beer turns to more as your tolerance increases. Two former addicts at the top comments literally told you this is how it starts. Good luck. It's not impossible to enjoy it I'm sure. Even I have managed to find a balance where I can do these things and gain enjoyment from them, but it doesn't work if I do them consistently. It works if I do them occasionally. We're human, creatures of habit. The longer you do a habit the more it becomes a lifestyle, and when something is a lifestyle, you invest into it.

Come back in 6 months and tell us how things have improved for you because, hey, maybe we're wrong.

GlennBeckAmerica · 2017-01-13T23:49:23+00:00

Its not lite drinking. You have a massive tolerance.

The-os · 2017-01-14T20:30:40+00:00

Drop it man. I'm currently seeing a friend of mine whirl down. He has always been quite the heavy drinking which increased to weekly going bad shit drunk. Recently found out he's been sniffing stuff along with it, basically losing control. After some bad news (losing familiy members) very recently he states that he wouldn't drink or do anything for a while, to get his shit together. You guessed it, yesterday he went bad shit crazy again. No matter what we said he wouldn't stop or come home with us. The message I'm trying to bring across: Don't do it man, it aint worth it. Just like everybody here has been saying.

whatsthisgarg · 2017-01-13T18:47:02+00:00

I probably get one fourth of my daily calories from vodka/tonics. I'm in my 50s and my testosterone is through the roof. I can get all my work done, and booze doesn't interfere with anything, because I have my priorities straight.

On the other hand, one of my best friends, probably once the smartest guy I've known, was such a booze-hound he couldn't get out of bed in order to keep a $300,000/year job. He is known and unwelcome at every Emergency Room in the city.

Alcoholism is totally biological. And booze is no more of a crutch than red meat.

Title	My Not-Drinking Problem
Author	truthyego
Upvotes	0
Comments	45
Date	January 13, 2017 4:38 PM UTC (9 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/TheRedPill
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/TheRedPill/comments/5nrmju/my_notdrinking_problem/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/TheRedPill/my-not-drinking-problem.39966 https://theredarchive.com/post/39966

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