Setting up dates 3.0

DareyFathom · 2018-10-22T14:13:14+00:00

Terrible advice. There's a reason PUAs almost universally discourage this. You will greatly reduce your opportunities setting rigid times. Unless your status is infinitely greater than the girl's this is gonna backfire. Even ole' Brad wasn't getting away with this with Angelina either because her status was comparable.

Quaternionz · 2018-10-22T14:13:58+00:00

This is decent advice. I do pretty much exactly this when setting up first dates.

Me: “We should hang out sometime.”

Her: “Sure!”

Me: “Cool. Let’s do <place> at <time>”

If she’s busy she’ll say “Oh, I’m not free at <time>, but how about <other time>?”

If the time and place doesn’t work for her she’ll let you know, obviously. It’s better to elicit information about her schedule by picking a random time and having it not work. Explicitly asking when she’s free does indeed come off as weak.

The same rule goes for picking a place and activity, and everything else about the date.

“When are you free?”

“Do you drink? Is it OK if we go for drinks?”

“What kind of food do you like? So we can pick a place.”

“Are you free for the whole evening, or should we just do something quick?”

Beta, beta, beta, but guys totally do this.

standardmissile · 2018-10-22T14:35:31+00:00

This is reasonable advice, but the reality is that it's good to be able to flip between the two.

A girl may be up for a date with you but not in your frame. So if you cockily tell her when and where and she's on the fence it might jar and turn her off. So read the signs and adjust accordingly.

You're only setting up a date (short, convenient, cheap) so you can progress to poundtown. If done correctly a girl will truly enter your frame in a way that confident logistics chat will never be able to do.

starky-kun · 2018-10-22T17:16:50+00:00

Personally I ask them when are they free, BUT I set up the location (close to my house obviously). I hate these sucky dates when you have to go to the back ass of nowhere just to meet a girl that won't even fuck you till the 7th date. Fuck. That. Coffee near my place or bust.

ShotgunTRP · 2018-10-22T19:29:03+00:00

The best trick I got from roosh

Day x or day y

Give them paradox of day, paradox of do/do not

Robster25 · 2018-10-22T19:35:06+00:00

You didn't understand Corey it seems. He tells people to ask the girl when she is free and then pick a date where you and her are free. Not to try to make time when she is available.

When you ask her: When are you free?

She: On Monday and Tuesday.

If you got nothing to do on Monday and Tuesday you can pick a day. If got something better to do, then you ask her when she is free to get together another time, because you are busy on Monday and Tuesday.

What I like about Corey is that he teaches to be true to yourself. But apparently there are some people who don't understand the most easiest things.

reddick1 · 2018-10-22T20:46:04+00:00

It's great in theory but in practice it doesn't work unless you really are proven to be high value in her mind. That's hard to do if you've never met before. While you shouldn't come off as desperate, you should still be a bit flexible on the date/time. You still need to choose the activity and suggest the time/day but compromise.

It's the first date so she hasn't had the opportunity to see how awesome you are. For meetings after the first, it's good to state your time and day directly, and girls who truly like you will drop other things to meet you at your desired time.

_be_happy_ · 2018-10-22T21:45:56+00:00

People sometimes forget here, that women are different than men... but still they are human.
She can be busy, she could have gyno appointment, she could have hair dresser appointment, maybe she is on her period, or she shaves her pubes on Thursdays...

Just ask her if X or Y works. Most of cases she will pick one, and you have a date. If she cannot you can just ask when is she free and if you are also free to set up that day.

If you offer one possible time, and she is busy, she will just not meet with you, whats the point then? What do you get? She may get some respect, but that was not enough to start running for you. They are getting tons of "let's meet for a coffee" all the time.

eyewant · 2018-10-23T15:51:10+00:00

I prefer the, "are you free on x or y?, lets go to z place"

In that way you arent framing it around when she is free, rather when you are both free

AnyDoughnut · 2018-10-23T18:48:32+00:00

I disagree. I believe dictating a day and time is a bad idea. There is a good chance she may legitimately be busy then, and you set yourself up for a rejection. I used to use that tactic and found it lacking.

Now I just simply say something along the lines of "let's get together. how's your schedule looking?" If you're free when she is meet up, if you aren't suggest some other time.

Foobyx · 2018-10-22T16:17:55+00:00

The best way to set a meeting professionally is to give 2 differents dates, so the other party has a choice.

I dont know about dating but professionally this 100% the way to go.

Title	Setting up dates 3.0
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	24
Comments	23
Date	October 22, 2018 1:31 PM UTC (7 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/TheRedPill
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/TheRedPill/comments/9qdu7n/setting_up_dates_30/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/TheRedPill/setting-up-dates-30.53003 https://theredarchive.com/post/53003

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