I'm not sure if there is a better place to write this but I thought maybe someone here could help. If this isn't the right place please direct me to the right one.

So a bit of a back story. I found this cool band and started to follow them on YouTube/FB. They now have about 8,000 followers on FB. It's a small amount compared to bigger artists so I have been able to interact with the band on their posts. Random comments like others who like their posts about what songs I like, liking a post they share, saying nice work, etc. Nothing extreme.

I really started dig the band and realized I like every song of theirs and that never happens to me. I vibed with the music so hard and every single song it was unreal. Good stuff. lol. Anyway I started to feel really into the vocalist. A crush if you will. Idk I felt like I recognized his soul through the music he writes (he writes the lyrics and also his vocals and artistic expression in general speaks to me)

Also he's handsome. I thought he was handsome the whole time but it wasn't until after a few months I was feeling this crush. He would comment back to me at times or like something I said. Nothing that was a big deal but i'd get excited about it.

After a while I said maybe I'll send a friend request why not. He has almost 5,000 friends. So I sent it. Every so often I wondered about it and why he didn't accept but I figured it's because he viewed me as a random person which is understandable or a fan. I'm friends with musicians since I am one but I figured it was one of those two things. idk those were my guesses.

It didn't bother me until after a while. I decided to go on to his fb via my laptop to and view his friends. I viewed recently added and it showed many women he had recently added. Immediately I felt sad and removed my friend request.

I don't feel I'm super horrible looking. I honestly don't understand. It makes me not want to even listen to their music anymore. Not because of the idea of him not looking at me attractively but I guess because I admired this person who now seems shallow to me. I mean, if it is about looks. Maybe I'm not "ugly" to him but just not very cute? Although he has women on his list that I would say are the same attractiveness as me. Idk.

Any thoughts? I have now stopped commenting on the band posts. I will like one here and there but I feel the someone I admired and admittedly had a crush on may just be some shallow kind of guy. I do still love the music but it does make me sad to hear it thinking of all of this and bring confused. Also because I feel a connection to this person in this odd way.. Idk.

I've been focusing on myself and just doing me. I guess I just wondered what anyone else would think if that happened to them. And just to be clear I never bombarded this person with messages. I did comment on a handful of youtube videos saying I liked some songs but nothing extreme. So yeah idk.

It is what it is at this point I guess I just wondered what another woman's perspective would be. I know this person doesn't owe me anything. I just figured if he adds tons of random people he would add me. I guess it made me feel pretty bad but I also realize it's a mirror of problems I have deep within that I need to work on. But idk. Just looking for some advice here or opinions.

Thank you