Question: Frame vs Rewarding Disrespect

RedPillCoach · 2018-11-10T17:34:35+00:00

Stop rewarding disrespectful behavior by not being butthurt and by STFU.

I don't see the conflict.

The issue is that you don't understand. You think a "reward" is something nice or positive. It is not. Her "reward" is seeing you hurt, making you butthurt, and forcing you to defend yourself. That makes her feel powerful and rewards her. That makes her engage in the behavior even more.

One version of STFU you can use on your vacation is really simple. When she is mean to the kids you can take them and leave her alone next to Space Mountain while you go to the Pirates of the Caribbean. If she follows, advise her she is only welcome if she can behave and treat that family nice. When she loses her shit and starts screaming in Disneyworld laugh in her face to punish the behavior or at least refuse to acknowledge it by STFU.

When you STFU and refuse to give her the satisfaction of seeing you butthurt it removes all the rewards for her behavior- or at least the rewards you have power over.

red-sfpplus · 2018-11-10T16:38:37+00:00

Rock and hard place.

Been there and done that with my STBXW more times than I can count.

Looking back, I would do it again.

Why? The kids never shut up about how much fun they had in Cali.

Make the trip about you and them, and not her.

Only a fag would cancel a family event based on an ungrateful wife.

Never let a terrorist win.

Edit: Add on MCT post and you have all you need. I address the specific event, his post is about root cause.

In both cases. A dose of “stop being a faggot” is needed.

BobbyPeru · 2018-11-10T19:04:24+00:00

Ok, you said you were a drunk captain, and now all of a sudden the drunk captain is trying to plan a medium budget vacation.... of course, she is going to shit test you. The original name for shit test is fitness test. You’ve been a drun captain, so she is testing your fitness.

You need to stop being all butthurt and see it for what it is. STFU, amused mastery, and maybe a little A&A... quit taking her so serious

MrChad_Thundercock · 2018-11-10T16:41:08+00:00

Tell her that if she doesn’t stop acting like a harpy cunt you’ll give her ticket to your hot young secretary at work. AA plus wink. Women are teenagers, treat at such.

“but it's become really severe recently”

Why? Something else is going on.. I hear this a lot with SAHMs. She sounds spoiled, probably needs a spanking. Maybe pent up feelz from being home all day long taking care of the kids, her hamster is running wild, now she’s acting out. You providing feelz ? Not just vacations right?

Why didn’t you put an end to this behavior weeks ago ? Seems like you are ignoring it and letting it linger on. You’re hung up on A. Above. You can’t do B. above until you have value. In the beginning, yes, just ignore her bitchness. but at one point when you become the Prize, tell her that her pissy attitude can hit the fucking road. You have other options,, right?, Do you?

Is she dtf? How long you been at this?

matrixtospartanatLV · 2018-11-10T19:49:02+00:00

Drunk Captain.

Fantastic cruise planned for benefit of the Captain and the crew.

First Officer acting shitty.

Captain considering canceling cruise.

Fuck.

Sober up, Captain.

LEAD the First Officer.

Yes, you can tell her, “...or walk the plank!” You can demand compliance, or lead her to give discretionary effort.

Find out what the fuck her problem is and lead her to fix it. Maybe she is looking at this ‘working vacation’ as a week when SHE is doing all the work. After all, in her solipsistic mind, YOU don’t really do any real work, anyway.

If YOU take a harpy cunt on vacation, that’s YOUR fault.

CAN you sober up long enough to LEAD your FO?

WILL you?

Rian_Stone · 2018-11-11T13:31:04+00:00

deleted ^{^{^What}} ^{^{^is}} ^{^{^this?}}

Redpillbrigade17 · 2018-11-10T22:58:53+00:00

Butt hurt. Why are you doing all this to begin with? If you have expectations that they’ll appreciate it then it’s your problem. You’re spoiling all of them and you know it. You’re asking yourself “how come they all act like such spoiled brats while I’m spinning my wheels working hard and providing for all this”. OI means that once you decide (we can deal with that decision separately) you’re going to spend all this $ and energy for these betas in your life to be entertained, you are not attached to outcomes. You’re going to be accepting of them acting like kids. That’s frame. Get butt hurt and you lose it.

Title	Question: Frame vs Rewarding Disrespect
Author	daxorid
Upvotes	6
Comments	20
Date	November 10, 2018 4:24 PM UTC (7 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askMRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/askMRP/comments/9vvkfd/question_frame_vs_rewarding_disrespect/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askMRP/question-frame-vs-rewarding-disrespect.203799 https://theredarchive.com/post/203799

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