Does fake it till you make it really work?

mrpthrowa · 2019-02-22T11:50:37+00:00

yes.

Popeman79 · 2019-02-22T13:30:08+00:00

You start by faking confidence, it gets you more success. Then this increased success, along with the experience that you've gained, makes you more confident naturally.

AnyDoughnut · 2019-02-22T12:17:01+00:00

Maybe, it depends on your life. If you have specific strong inadequacies you still need to work on them, because faking it only goes so far.

iwishiwasgayandcute · 2019-02-22T13:45:39+00:00

Max out your SMV and you will never be in the situation where you have to fake your confidence. Imagine yourself full trained out, huge muscles, nice definition and 95% of every other men will look like a bitch beside you. So lift like your life depends on it. Additionally do some martial arts if you have got the time and money. Big muscles, nice style and the ability to fight anyone in your social circle is going to put you up so much. Thats the reason why you should lift.

Don_Draper27 · 2019-02-22T23:33:26+00:00

It helps and it's better than being your pathetic boring self.

I was a typical nice guy when I was with my LTR of 5 years. I was never confrontational. I was mostly just quiet and I tried to get along with everyone. Everyone was either just ok with me or somewhat thought I was cool enough. I wasn't really praised or highly respected. If I tried taking the lead or being assertive I'd be overblown by resistance and shit tests that I'd just go back to the passengers seat.

Anyways, broke up with LTR. All of friends ditched me and ghosted me. I was alone. Sucks, but cool, I get to start anew. Started acting a new persona. I was trying to be a fun, outcome independent, asshole-ish, down for anything type of guy. It mostly worked out. It was fun seeing how far I could push people's buttons and it helped build my own frame too.

Only down side of this is that it's not genuine. People pick up on the micro expressions and you're going to give yourself away.

I got called out once. I was out with a buddy of mine and his 3 coworkers. 2 girls and 1 gay guy. First time meeting them. With the girls, I was constantly teasing, negging, and just trying to be the "bad boy" persona. Everything was going cool until one of the girls said, "wow, he's sooooooo meaaaaaan" after I pushed her purse to the floor. The gay guy called me out and said, "he's not mean. He's actually a nice guy, he's just trying to be an asshole." I was like, "fuck." After that the girls were less receptive to me and I calmed down a little bit and started being my normal self.

Eventually it built up though and became more genuine and natural. Nowadays I tease and neg women easily, almost naturally. Some times it gets overboard and some light tension builds in the room when I'm shit testing other guys but it's never too bad. I got a little overboard like 2 weeks ago with this group at a concert I went to and one of the guys spoke up and told me to take a step back. I reflect back and I admit I was too aggressive with them. I deserved the rejection but it's cool cause it's a learning process and I think that I've become enough of an asshole now that I can now practice on building a little more comfort.

Battletoad101 · 2019-02-25T17:25:25+00:00

CharlesChadworth · 2019-02-26T11:34:00+00:00

Yes, unless you are about to operate on a patient with no prior exp or fly a 737 with no training. Otherwise yes.

zxcvb7809 · 2019-02-22T12:10:28+00:00

I don't think so but maybe. It would probably be quicker to do the things you know you should do and for whatever reason don't. Like cleaning your room, exercising working for the promotion, starting a business or chasing your dream objectives. Doing that will make you confident a hell of a lot faster than pretending in my experience.

I think confidence comes from knowing what you are doing and where you are going, or where you are trying to go. So you don't really have time to entertain people who aren't sure ya know? That sense of drive is the essence of confidence.

Best of luck!

Title	Does fake it till you make it really work?
Author	polarizingpotato
Upvotes	3
Comments	8
Date	February 22, 2019 11:44 AM UTC (7 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/atglol/does_fake_it_till_you_make_it_really_work/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/does-fake-it-till-you-make-it-really-work.219492 https://theredarchive.com/post/219492

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