Going to bars alone?

Hudoneit · 2014-11-22T14:25:38+00:00

I'd like to here what others have to say but my advice would be to look approachable. Look content with being alone. Don't stay too long or end up getting drunk there. Also, it's a hit a miss depending on the bar, but if someone sits down next to you start up a little small talk or tell them you notice something about them and then don't bother them unless they seem like they want a conversation. This isn't so much women advice as it is friend finding advice. Say that your waiting for a friend too so as to not come off as a loner.

ThrownAwayTRP · 2014-11-22T06:36:34+00:00

This can be difficult. A significant reason women will talk to you is your social status, or appearance of such. Some of my best successes have been because I'm with a group of friends and completely ignoring women. I had a literal beauty queen come up and beg my friend to introduce us because I was facing away from her and talking with my boys.

Point is, it wont be impossible but it won't be easy either. You somehow have to convey status and approachability all by your lonesome. And, if you're already not the best at conversation then you have an uphill battle.

redpillspeeddate · 2014-11-22T06:41:12+00:00

Hey, I suffer from the same issue, no friends that want to go out.

So, I roll solo 95% of the time.

Check out a few posts in my history, pretty much all of my success comes from rolling solo.

Few things off the top:

Suit up! Pocket square the whole deal, wear a shirt that is not white or black something with a bright color and a pocket square that is like it. See Christian McQueens stuff about style.

Start learning and drinking scotch and craft cocktails, talk to bartenders, learn from them, have them introduce you.

Become a regular at a couple of bars/lounges - when all the staff knows you it's easy to make suggestions to the new talent that walks thought the door.

Learn how to dance, take partner dancing classes, I recommend swing or salsa. Great ratio and if you get to be a decent lead you can take any girl on the floor and look good.

These are a few of the things I do and it works well.

asd1100 · 2014-11-22T13:08:56+00:00

Any advice for going to bars alone?

be casual, the less you put in the interaction and the more you let if flow the better the outcome.

Also not very good at making new friends.

that is a issue you got to get over. I think you are overrating friendship and expect people to give you validation gratuitously.

Maybe I should wait around and just enjoy my beer? And any good ways to explain coming to the bar alone?

to watch the "sports game", I do it at least once a week(old habit from when my cable provider didn't have foreign campionships and formula one)

anyone in Philadelphia who goes out regularly?

the fuck dude, your city has a team in every major competition, and is a college town.

You can find both dudes and girls to hang out with on your average night out.

Stop planning shit and just go with the flow if opportunities arise.

alpha_n3rd · 2014-11-22T13:47:17+00:00

I've traveled a lot which means I've gone to bars alone a lot. I'm married so I don't usually bother approaching women but I rarely fail to find a buddy to shoot the shit with. The trick is going to the right bar. Not too crowded, not too loud. Get a seat at the bar. Elbow room is nice but don't be afraid to sit next to somebody if it's more crowded. Usually I get food. Get a basket of fries to share, that's a good way to break the ice. If it's really slow you can talk to the bartender. Anyway pick somebody and say something like "how you doin?" Then pick something random thing to talk about and comment on it. The weather always works if you're uninspired. Then probe around for a common interest, preferably something you can ask them questions about. People love to talk about themselves. If you don't want to admit why you're out alone just tell them you're traveling.

sagarsash · 2014-11-22T14:24:32+00:00

Honestly I think the best thing to do would be to pick up outside the club.

I starting doing this because I was broke and couldn't afford £10 to get inside a club in London. In my experience it's very easy to start conversations in a main square (eg asking for a lighter), and then you can build an entourage to enter the club with. Better yet, if they're all girls you'll probably be able to get in for free/cheap.

This works quite well if you're on your own and it's easy to have a meaningful conversation because there's no loud music, so you can go into the club like old friends.

dale0607 · 2014-11-22T23:17:06+00:00

I used to goto bars alone, but it would be on a certain event night. More often a trivia night. I'd ask to be in any group that was forming and it created a great social atmosphere.

Lizard_king_420 · 2014-11-22T11:55:59+00:00

If I was in your situation I think I would hit up bars in nice restaurants. Go sit down and get a nice meal, beer and act interested in what ever sports is on the TV. Act like you are enjoying yourself. Smile, make idle chat with the bar keeps. When people see you they think "hes here to eat, drink a beer and watch some sports. Get out of the house" versus "Hes a lonely sob who is desperate for female companionship".

Plus, at a nice restaurant you may run into a nice group of women, some single some taken, who are eating as well. If you go to a beer joint bar you just scrapping the barrel so to speak.

JackGetsIt · 2014-11-22T15:00:36+00:00

One thing is pick bars that have a reputation as singles bars. There's better luck when there's more available people. I personally enjoy dance halls because it's an easy opening to simply ask, "do you want to dance?" If you look comfortable and approachable there's a good chance you'll be asked to dance. You can also easily see which groups of women a there without men and who want to dance, (they will be standing near the dance floor gyrating and looking around for a partner, that's you!).

Title	Going to bars alone?
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	14
Comments	13
Date	November 22, 2014 4:40 AM UTC (11 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/2n202t/going_to_bars_alone/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/going-to-bars-alone.143871 https://theredarchive.com/post/143871

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