How do i make conversation/friends at my gym

chomponthebit · 2018-06-08T16:31:22+00:00

I just put on my headphones and go. I exchange nods with people I know, and some handshakes with acquaintances from the outside. Some “hi”s and random chitchat on the way in and out, or in the change room. Other than that, I’m there to work.

Picked up two f-closes from the gym: they initiated. Both times by the fountain. Just work hard, show gains, and shit happens.

RedPilledRoaster · 2018-06-08T17:57:49+00:00

Quit trying to. Don’t be that guy who interrupts people’s workouts because he has no friends.

Let it happen naturally.

WorldNewPilla · 2018-06-08T16:54:33+00:00

not an expert or anything, but two things happened to me lately at the gym:

There was a guy next to me that was doing some sort of weird-cool looking calisthenics exercise, so I asked him about it and we kept on talking about gym related things. really cool guy, as you can guess we greet each other everytime we meet.
Met an old friend from High school and we had a chat regarding a trip to south america he went to. there was this dude next to us that joined the conversation and we all talked about trips and stuff...

I guess these examples might help, again, I'm not an expert whatsoever but I guess it might show you the right path.

Olongapo · 2018-06-08T18:10:06+00:00

When I started hitting the gym in 2004 I knew that I didn't know what I was doing (I was post-divorce after 27 years of marriage to a woman who had an Eat Pray Love moment) and I knew it. Being naturally outward, I walk over to four really well-built guys about half my age and simply stated; "I don't know what the fuck I'm doing. Can you tell me how to not hurt myself?" They all said. "Why yes, we can?" I chatted with all of those guys for the next three years I was in that city. They corrected my form and I offered tips in how to manage and thrive in a corporate environment.

Ditto for my next city but by then I had made some serious transformations. Started with a guy who was obviously a competitor. He gave me tips and I told him how to deal with colicky babies.

TL:DR Ask for help. You might be surprised.

Chad1738 · 2018-06-08T16:29:48+00:00

see someone lifting heavy weight and ask how much it is. or what kind of routine they are doing that day. start with something that is gym related and go from there. its easy bro. good luck

bigboyfartpaste · 2018-06-08T19:39:20+00:00

I don't make friends there because I'm there to work out. Personally, having a 5 minute conversation break during my workout kills my momentum and mood for the rest of the workout.

Irishminer93 · 2018-06-08T18:32:25+00:00

You’re not at the gym to make friends.

borp900 · 2018-06-08T17:25:23+00:00

my first friend i made was just asking how much reps he was doing. Learnt a lot from him about form, mma and stuff like that. 2nd i just asked what muscle groups he was priortizing.

abudun79 · 2018-06-08T18:13:48+00:00

What comes natural is to talk to people about something they do, that you're interested in or don't know, so that you might actually learn something.

Or if there's someone with a build similar to yours and you are interested in how he exactly achieved this or that detail about his muscles.

Just don't interrupt someones sets.

[deleted] · 2018-06-08T19:14:39+00:00

"The Like Switch" by Jack Schafer and "How to Win Friends and Influence People" by Dale Carnegie. Audible them.

Tblhunter1 · 2018-06-08T19:23:37+00:00

Hey man,

It would help you to greet the staff and make casual conversation when appropriate. Knowing them and saying hi as you come in will make it easier to approach others when the time is right.

As for me, I occasionally ask people for help when I need it, will comment on a workout shirt I think is cool or funny (example: some guys Glock sweatshirt, "hey nice sweatshirt - I'm a Glock man myself"). I will usually only approach women that I receive IOI's from at a time where they do not look too busy. Occasionally, I will cold approach with a compliment, but only when it is sincere - typically when I am entering or exiting with them.

In short, use your judgment skills and knowledge of body language to help you know when. It takes practice! When in doubt, connect with empathy and give a genuine compliment!

"Hey, sorry to bother you but I just wanted to say I like your xyz"

Hope this helps.

Fapisluv · 2018-06-08T20:32:58+00:00

Talk to the gym staff first. Make some casual conversation with them. They should be seeing you and greet you by name. After that, speak to people you see on your way out, in the water cooler. Speak to men next to your station when you are both resting.

You need to become a regular for many months at least, to make friends in the gym, in a natural non forced way. Especially in your meathead gym. They need to see you improving and passing the test of time.

LiftingShithead · 2018-06-08T22:28:13+00:00

When people see you make gains and notice you are a regular, they will treat you differently and it will happen naturally.

ownthatshitmanup · 2018-06-08T23:39:56+00:00

to add on to the rest of the great comments here. Desperation is fucking disgusting. Even you don't want to be friends with a desperate person, it means he has nothing and wants to cling and leech from you. Let them come to you or you have something great to offer. Never open up desperate wanting something.

KakarotSSJ4 · 2018-06-08T16:27:35+00:00

Idk I typically just talk to regulars or when it's busy I work in between someone's set.

Title	How do i make conversation/friends at my gym
Author	Redpillreader22
Upvotes	10
Comments	27
Date	June 8, 2018 4:24 PM UTC (8 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/8pla58/how_do_i_make_conversationfriends_at_my_gym/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/how-do-i-make-conversationfriends-at-my-gym.99540 https://theredarchive.com/post/99540

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