Okay so a little backstory...and I apologize in advance if this is a rant.

I came to TRP about 3 years about after a bad breakup where I had a huge beta meltdown. My only regret is that I did not find TRP sooner.

Started dating a girl about a year ago as we met through work. I work at an academic lab/core and our core helps other labs with their research. We were helping hers as well.

Anyway I am 32, she's 24. She's a PhD student and incredibly smart. She's also impulsive, emotionally selfish, a little solipsistic, somewhat self-righteous and acts like a know-it-all.

We date for about a month while she tells me she is casually dating other people. I don't really care, as we haven't established anything yet. Anyways she decides she only wants to date me after awhile and tells me that she loves me at 6 months.

Now here is where stuff gets bad. She was upset at me for not responding in kind to the "i love you" comment as I wasn't sure I did and wasn't going to lie to her. This upset her immensely and made her feel unloved (whatever).

She also wanted me to live with her which I rejected based on finances (which wasn't true I just didn't want to live with her - never cohabitate - in hindsight should have just said that).

All the while I told her she should bail if she wasn't happy (because I wasn't going to turn beta for her essentially).

It took me a very long time to develop feelings for her as I have been burned in the past and am very cautious.

About two weeks ago she goes on a week long trip for work and comes back and ends it. I am totally fine with it ending (the usual feelings of a break up - nothing new here).

She proceeds to destroy me and my life by saying a lot of things about my life and how I live it and for the first time in my life I felt sick to my stomach based on what she said. This in turn angers me because it affects me, but during the talk I hold frame and don't show that.

So I go no contact. My younger self would have issues with this but I don't nowadays. In relative terms she's not the hottest I've dated and could do better, but we had a lot of fun together.

About a month before our breakup I got her a job at a place I used to work at and still pick up shifts (which I should never have done in hindsight).

All the while for 2 months during our relationship she had "doubts" and didn't bother to tell me about them or bail when they happened and let them fester.

Anyways, I am trying to maintain no contact from her, and a clean break would be applicable but it is tough since I still will have to see her at some point via both works.

This is also her first true relationship (which she didn't disclose until we broke up) and she is really pissed that I am ghosting her. She doesn't think she did anything wrong (typical girl bullshit), and it doesn't make sense to her why I am not talking to her.

She has tried to get in touch with me through a mutual friend (mine more than hers) from work to see if I am "okay". I responded that I was fine but disappointed and mad of the things she said and how she handled it and left it at that.

She drunk texts me the other night wanting to know if I am okay. Something like this: "I miss you and I really am sorry" "Please" "Do you want to talk" "sorry the bartender gave me 2 margaritas, I am sorry for bothering you, I'm dumb, goodnight"

I didn't respond at all until the next morning when I told her that my core would have her stuff done for her in the next couple days.

She rips into me about how I don't have enough respect for her to text her back (bitch,please, you want to talk about respect).

She wants the emotional support from me and I am not giving it to her and I refuse to, it's not my job and told her that.

What angers me is that she didn't think she did anything wrong (i.e. analyzing my life and then shredding it to pieces during the break-up) and is angry I am not responding to her that way she wants.

All of this angers me, and it shouldn't which further angers me because it does. Just mind boggling that she feels she isn't culpable and feels bad and is searching for validation from me to make her feel better. I am trying to deal with my anger as I should by lifting and dating other women (which has been a relief).

But also a lot of TRP truths have shown their ugly head and I figured they would.

I am trying to keep this whole situation out of my head to not interfere or influence my mood while on other dates, but I still struggle with my anger. I have had anger issues in the past and I meditate. But any other advice besides going no contact and dealing with her when I have to at respective works?

EDIT: Thanks for all your advice much needed and helpful!