I’m so lonely. What should I do?

quarternickledime · 2019-08-19T04:40:52+00:00

Go do some shit that you want to do.

What are you interested in? Answer that, and we can go from there.

SouthernProcess · 2019-08-19T05:16:14+00:00

Approach. Realize that not a lot people have your best interests at heart. Increase your value, social skills, and let the people come to you.

ggggggggee · 2019-08-19T04:25:23+00:00

Watch this OP

https://youtu.be/ZLzAmaeBkUU

AV_Empire · 2019-08-19T06:54:19+00:00

Go Monk Mode for a month. Decide to go on the epic journey of finding happiness in solitude.

Or get married and learn it the hard way.

rnsbrum · 2019-08-19T04:40:01+00:00

I have no idea. Honestly I think its a biological thing, we have lived in tight communities for thousands of years and only in modern times we started to become so alienated. The only thing that actually helped me was to make peace with it and actually enjoy loneliness. It doesn't bother me anymore because I'm not alone in my thoughts. Also you can create imaginary friends and be aware that God is always with you.

Being dependent in other people to feel good is a weakness, because they can be taken away from you at any time. Think about this and enjoy every time you are with your friends. It only takes one second and they are all gone, forever.

EDIT: It only takes one second for them to be gone (killed)

acp_rdit · 2019-08-19T04:36:36+00:00

Hit the gym

TRPrefreshaccount1 · 2019-08-19T06:26:27+00:00

Go out and do whatever you want to do. Enjoy yourself, do whatever the fuck you want to do. Imo only a few activities are better with other people. A lot of them are more enjoyable alone. Although that doesn't mean you can't meet new people along the way

mustard5 · 2019-08-19T10:47:41+00:00

There is an interesting paradox in life. When we are surrounded by people in a big city, we can feel lonely and disconnected from everything. There is no connection.

If we were to travel to the country and live for a while close to nature, although still alone, we might feel more connected with our natural surroundings. This is the solitude expressed by Henry David Thoreau in his book, 'Walden'. We feel connected to nature.

At the root of the issue is connection. We crave connection and are comforted by it. We can find connection in both the city and in nature. We can choose to be a part of something. So I would say, find something to be connected to. At our most basic level, we are connected to nature and it is the complexity of society that strips us of that connection and isolates us.

We are an ecosystem, expressed through relationship, not just an element.

Connection, brother. ;-)

stonewallair · 2019-08-19T10:29:59+00:00

What's your age group?

Tenn81 · 2019-08-19T11:20:52+00:00

Get a dog.

Pdubzilla · 2019-08-19T12:52:50+00:00

I used to think things are better when you are with someone you care about. Then I realized that when I think back to a show I enjoyed or a trip that was fun, I couldn't remember if I did that with my ex-wife or with my current girlfriend or someone else. That put things in perspective.

If you can't remember who you were with when you had a good time, does it matter who it was?

Gaidsbola · 2019-08-19T15:18:00+00:00

Move to the woods and try to ass fuck a momma bear. You guys will get real intimate real fast.

Don_Draper27 · 2019-08-19T16:37:04+00:00

Learn to become an individual and enjoy the time you have with yourself.

Quick story time: A little over 2 years ago I broke up with an LTR of 5 years thanks to TRP. Being with someone almost every day for that long means that your friends become her friends and vice versa. I broke up with her 2 weeks before my birthday with the intention of using my special day as a distraction from the pain. I had booked a hotel room with 3 beds that fit 6 people. I remember thinking that I would have to be selective with who I invited because these 6 slots would be filled quick. Only 1 friend ended up coming and I had to pay for all his drinks because he was broke. All my "friends" ghosted me after the breakup. I was completely off guard and alone. This 1 friend who stuck around lived a few counties away and worked evenings so we never had the same days off.

I was in a tough spot. I was recovering from a break up and was dealing with the fact that the people I thought were my friends and that I had spent vacations and good times with suddenly didn't want to talk to me anymore. I sulked on this for a week or 2 until I was forced to see the light in my situation. By having my foundation and what I thought was my reality become shattered and broken, I was able to begin anew. What if every new person I met knew nothing about me so I could be whoever I wanted to be? What if everyone I encountered saw me at my current SMV and had zero knowledge of my old beta self?

I built off this. I learned quickly that every new social group I met would only know me starting from that moment. They didn't know that I was skinny fat in high school or that I was voted most shy in 7th grade. They didn't know that I was a beta in my last relationship and was known for getting butt-hurt over little things. They would know the new me. The "Me" that I wanted to be.

So my story began and I took action. I went to concerts and events by myself. I approached strangers and made friends. I started dating and spinning plates for the first time. I began getting invited to weekend trips and birthday events. The greatest joy from all this was that I was respected a lot more from higher quality people than my old group.

That same year I took an even bigger action and quit my job and moved out of state. Again I was alone without any social circles but this time I wasn't afraid and I didn't feel alone. I was excited. I was confident in my ability to build a social network from nothing. My next birthday I had a house party thrown for me. New and old friends showed up. Home made cake. A piñata. Life has been great ever since.

SimplyFishOil · 2019-08-19T12:22:02+00:00

Got family? Talk to them

Otherwise find a new hobby and join the local and internet groups.

Or you could take advantage of being lonely. Work on something that can make you money

Title	I’m so lonely. What should I do?
Author	quarternickledime
Upvotes	20
Comments	30
Date	August 19, 2019 4:19 AM UTC (7 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/csc1qq/im_so_lonely_what_should_i_do/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/im-so-lonely-what-should-i-do.249140 https://theredarchive.com/post/249140

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