LJBF

HardTruths83 · 2018-10-31T14:31:28+00:00

She started dating somebody she sees as higher value than you. Either take the LJBF rejection and replace her with some plates, or take it to heart and be sad about it. My suggestion: NEXT! "It was just your turn".

Quaternionz · 2018-10-31T15:58:44+00:00

Remember to play off of her cues when it comes to defining what “friendship” means. As a dude when you get LJBF you have to be aware that 29/30 times this will mean “Casual acquaintances who never talk and see each other maybe 2 times per year, probably only when running into each other by accident.”

Feel free to accept her LJBF. “Sure, friends it is. Why not.” Always look to her to set the terms of the friendship though, through her actions and not her words.

If she puts in an effort to keep a legitimate friendship going then fine, but never put that effort in yourself first. She’s more likely to abuse and take advantage of your friendship if she sees you as a beta orbiter. You’re less likely to abuse her the same way if the roles are flipped.

Her: “Oh, hey, can you come help me install this heavy AC unit?”

You: “Sure! I’ll be over in 30.”

Her: “Can you bring some beer?”

You: “Sure, why not.” (You buy the beer).

Then two weeks later:

You: “Hey, I got locked out of my apartment and I need a place to crash tonight.”

Her: “I have a lot of work to do tonight actually, sorry!”

Then she never remotely tries to reciprocate for the AC help and the free beers.

Genuine, balanced, 1:1 friendship with a woman that’s mutually free of problematic sexual tension is pretty rare, and possibly nonexistent.

MattyAnon · 2018-10-31T18:03:11+00:00

you're supposed to decline her offer and tell her to hit you up when she changes her mind

Not really. The problem is that she believes she is offering you something by letting you continue to do things for her. If you say "no thanks", she'll get all insulted and you'll be hit with "you just want to fuck me" which is obviously true but she now frames it as a problem.

Instead what you do is to agree wholeheartedly with her friendship request, then proceed to NOT be friends with her, and game her at your leisure.

Don't do anything friendsy. Don't be her friend. DO NOTHING FOR HER. Nothing I tell you. ZERO.

Be elusive, be distant. She might change her mind, might not, move on either way.

The only point of agreeing to LJBF is to shut her up about it.

I replied sure, only because we were friends prior to us dating but I withdrew alot of my attention. Taking long to text back, always busy, declining to hangout etc. I guess I'm looking for more clarification on how to respond to this?

You did this about right.

She should feel the pain of your lack of attention.

CainPrice · 2018-10-31T14:37:32+00:00

I'll assume that if you and this girl were friends before you started having sex, then she brought some kind of value into your life that was worth your investment into the friendship. (If not, you have a different issue completely unrelated to the fact that you've had sex with this girl.) Assuming she still brings value into your life, it's fine to be friends with her.

If she's all weird and awkward and stops making an effort at being a decent friend because she's caught up in her new boyfriend or casual sex partner, just let her go. Not because you used to hook up and there's some kind of Red Pill rule about being friends, but because she's being a shitty friend that's not worth the investment.

Assuming she's a good friend, stick around. When things don't work out with whatever new guy she LJBF'd you for and she's looking for something casual again, girls prefer hooking up with a previous partner versus meeting new guys. She already knows you're good in bed, safe, respectful, and discreet. That beats trying to meet a new casual partner and rolling the dice.

chim_city · 2018-10-31T17:41:20+00:00

She's not into you. Don't waste anymore time. You can't negotiate attractiveness.

HurricaneHugues · 2018-10-31T16:20:52+00:00

What speech? Its still the same thing. You stop being "friends". Its that simple. You were never really "friends" innthe first place. One of you really like the other and stuck around because of it. Evidently, you more than her.

DiscordantMonk · 2018-10-31T16:38:03+00:00

"let's just be friends with benefits" I said with a smirk.

ChadFromColumbus · 2018-10-31T17:04:43+00:00

She found someone better than you but still wants your attention.

Highly doubt you were true “friends” with her before. You should have straight up told her no. NEXT!

Ricklogical · 2018-10-31T14:44:19+00:00

Every sexual relationship has a timeline. If you can just be friends it shows abundance.

If you cant you are shallow or scarce. Go game and approach other women. Be her friend or not but get a new chick for sex

CharlesChadworth · 2018-11-01T00:19:50+00:00

IHEF (I have enough friends)

You dated, it didnt work. Move on, talk to another girl who doesnt want you to be her beta orbiter cuck as she slides Chad's dick down her throat while texting you about her day... next.

mseand · 2018-11-01T02:36:01+00:00

To me it’s a shit test. It’s either agree and amplify or ignore

HaroldTFinch · 2018-10-31T17:00:07+00:00

She just tossed you in her Goodwill pile.

Make that a visual and I think you know what to do

Title	LJBF
Author	Backthatpassup451
Upvotes	4
Comments	19
Date	October 31, 2018 2:28 PM UTC (7 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/9sz8gd/ljbf/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/ljbf.136240 https://theredarchive.com/post/136240

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