LTR: Too late to save?

Misteralcala · 2014-09-03T16:27:09+00:00

Being Redpill doesn't mean being a dick. Think of the captain / first mate dynamic: sure, the captain can be an asshole to the first mate, but that wouldn't be optimal. Instead of bullying, the captain should lead by example and do what is best for the relationship, by guiding and making sure the first mate is happy to do her share.
Learn how to get a woman to do things. Instead of saying "Honey, I need you to go to the store today and do some laundry" you say "What do you want to do first today, go to the store or laundry?" You don't give a woman orders - you give her options. This gives her a sense of ownership and lets her feel she's doing things on her own terms.
Sex. It needs to be spontaneous, passionate and random. If you're watching TV, you grab the remote, turn it off, take her by the hand and drag her to the bedroom where you proceed to spank her butt and fuck her like she's a new lay. Or just take her on the couch. DON'T ASK FOR SEX. EVER. Because then you are giving her a chance to hamster out of it or use it as a bargaining tool. Just take it and if she stops you, then you get up, get dressed, leave the house for an hour or two, walk around the mall or go have a drink and don't tell her where you go or what you do. After one or two times this will build up the dread and she will submit. Also, this is a good phrase to get used to saying after sex: "I'm so glad you take care of my needs. It means I'll never have to go somewhere else!"
Stop asking permission. You're an adult. Instead, you tell her you're going out with friends or whatever you want to do. The only time you should consult her is for larger decisions that impact you both: joint credit or a new apartment. But as far as having to explain yourself for every little thing - don't.
In public, you should always be nice to other women, verging on the edge of flirting, but not, for plausible deniability "What? Don't be silly! I was just being nice!". Grab her hand or put your arm around her and hold her hip when you walk. Usher through doors or move her along with a hand at the small of her back. Get her used to your touch in public. This will build her self-esteem up and she will crave the feel of you.
Maintaining frame will be the hardest part, but that just requires vigilance and practice standing up for yourself. You're on the right path. Good luck.

Simpsondimsum · 2014-09-03T16:55:35+00:00

Its never too late to get a girl to start fucking you again.

Stop all of your nonsexual touches
Up your out-of-bedroom sexual vibes. Squeeze her ass. Bite her neck. Whisper something sexual and dominating into her ear. If she says "is all you want from me, sex" without you having explicitly asked for sex, you're doing it right. And when she asks you that, don't respond by explaining yourself. That is weak and unattractive.
Reward her sexual corporation with short bouts of attention. Do it in a "good girl" sort of tone. Maintain your strength and make her know that you are someone to respect.
Work out. Wear as little clothing as possible. Seeing a well-built man walking around the house with muscles showing is extremely attractive for any sexual woman, especially if she sees you doing stuff: fixing things, mowing the lawn, cooking a hot meal. Visible muscle movement is attractive.
Give it a few weeks before you start DREAD GAME. If you up your game and then she doesn't keep up that's when you can use dread game.

NEVER PUNISH A WOMAN FOR FAILING TO BE ATTRACTED TO A BETA MALE. SHE IS JUST FOLLOWING NATURE. ALPHA UP THEN INITIATE REWARD-PUNISHMENT SYSTEMS

R_E_D_1 · 2014-09-03T19:41:17+00:00

/u/bankruptedcasino has a recent comment illustrating a wonderfully succinct, but thorough representation of LTR dread game. Find it. Read it. Memorize it twice. Practice it thrice.

Aughin · 2014-09-03T16:36:19+00:00

I went through that transition with the same girl I am with now. What you need to do is to let it take its natural course. Don't force a behavior you read about here without understanding it. Read all the sidebar literature and when you feel you completely agree with it then act on it. Resistance to change from her will come because something new and weird is happening that she doesn't understand, it will transform Into attraction as soon as she gets comfortable with it.

Why I tell you this cliche sounding info is because if you try to implement something from here before you even understand it then it will most likely come off needy or cringy.

For example. A lot of guys try to stop their girls from going on a 2 night hike alone with their ex. This will most likely escalate to a fight because you are limiting her free choice, rather than that realize that she might not be the girl you want to be with if she sees that as something she should be able to do and still stay with you. Tell her that you don't wanna live with a girl who neglects her mans opinions that easily then dump her if she goes through with it.

Both these scenarios can be interpreted from when someone gives you the tip to not let your gf spend time with her ex.

TheReason13 · 2014-09-03T19:17:54+00:00

You appear to be over thinking things, Its not as complicated as you're making it out to be. There are two kinds of behavior that you will encounter with people, behavior that you don't encourage (bad behavior) and behavior that you do encourage (good behavior).

When people exhibit behavior that has a negative effect on you, you must swiftly punish it with indifference and withdrawal of all privileges.

When people exhibit behavior that has a positive effect on you, you must reward it with attention and privileges.

In any interaction just ask yourself, "how is this persons behavior affecting me, negatively or positively?" Then punish or reward accordingly.

It is not your concern how this reward system affects other people, your only concern is for how it affects you. The reward system will gradually remove all toxic and negative people from your life, they will either adapt to comply with your demands or they must be removed. Either way you always win. If you are afraid of losing your LTR then you have already lost, life doesn't work that way. You must remove the Disney movie idealism from your LTR, its toxic. Your GF is just a woman and AWALT.

Lil_Dick_McFarts · 2014-09-03T21:18:23+00:00

Improve yourself as much as you can. focus on you and not on her. She is just a passenger on the journey you are CHOOSING to let her in. She needs you, you don't need her. Now go hit the gym focus on yourself and watch as she comes over to worship you like the sexual god you deserve to be.

If not youll be at your APEX and you can find someone else.

It sounds like she has a lack of respect for you, and the only thing you can do is generate a lot of respect for yourself.

El_Serpiente_Roja · 2014-09-03T23:15:36+00:00

I know better now, not just about telling her but about my worth.

the essence of TRP

tyranus89 · 2014-09-04T04:32:10+00:00

A note to everyone who says "I don't want to break up with her for reasons undisclosed": this puts us in a shitty situation. You're asking us if your relationship is saveable, but not giving us the option of telling you "no". You're also not giving us the full picture, and so we can't make a fair judgment, because you may be leaving out key details that could be relevant, and you just don't think they are.

Often times on askTRP, guys will pose a question thinking the only answers are "yellow" or "green" --- when the proper answer is actually "purple". You won't foresee a certain answer, and that's why you're stuck asking the question.

kingofpoplives · 2014-09-04T19:10:14+00:00

Sex is a problem. How can I reverse all these months of letting her just say no and taking it?

Beta is a ratchet. Once the process begins, the only way to reverse it is creating massive disruption in the relationship. Break up with her, cheat on her, do something to create an incredible amount of drama. These are really the only ways to reignite the fires of passion.

It seems like doing that in a non-LTR or not living together is easy, but I can't seem to find specific guidance to living together in an LTR

That's because living together in an LTR is TRP on hard mode.

You have two primary weapons: dominate and withdraw. The problem with living together is that your capacity to withdraw is severely hampered by the cohabitation and if she chooses to resist your dominance it gives her many ways to make your life suck.

Unless you don't want to go nuclear (cheat, dump her) your only option is to draw your line in the stand and hold to it with extreme vigilance. Set your frame and never break it. Make it clear that you will allow her to leave (or leave her) before breaking it.

If you implementation is skillful and she is willing to accept these new terms the relationship should improve.

Title	LTR: Too late to save?
Author	throwawaykoffee
Upvotes	11
Comments	13
Date	September 3, 2014 3:59 PM UTC (11 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/2fd702/ltr_too_late_to_save/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/ltr-too-late-to-save.141852 https://theredarchive.com/post/141852

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