I need to vent. And there are questions couched within this vent, but really I just need to get this out of my system by writing it out. I don’t expect anyone to read this shitty wall of text.

Yesterday marked one year of involuntary celibacy. I’m on a serious drought and in a really bad frame of mind. And if you knew me, you’d be very embarrassed for me. I’ve told a couple close friends this and their jaw dropped. It’s because (here comes the boasting – sorry) I’m very good looking and successful. I often get compliments like “gorgeous man” and “extremely handsome”. I’m 29 yrs old, 5’10”, 180lbs, 10-12% bf, visible abs, 17” arms. Someone recently told me I look a lot like Chris Hemsworth. On top of that I’m a successful, well-dressed lawyer living in a luxury apartment in a lively downtown area. I have a ton of really close friends and good parents. I’m truly blessed.

But this wasn’t always the case. Just 4 years ago I was a broke student and I was fat. Didn’t kiss or lose virginity until I was 24. I hated myself so much and thought so low of myself that I didn’t even dare to look at a girl. I luckily didn’t do beta cringey things because I purposely never put myself around women. So you can imagine what this dramatic skyrocketing of SMV has done to me. There’s a severe incongruence in my personality. It’s like I’ve suddenly been given the costume of a celebrity and everyone can smell that something is off when I walk the red carpet.

I consistently match with the hottest girls on tinder - IG models, college cheerleaders, etc. Some really hot ones have even “superliked” me. They message me first or instantly reply to my messages. They give me their #s. They agree to my fun date idea. Then they ghost or flake in the worst way, usually the day of our planned meetup. This has happened at least 10-15 times this year. At one point I had screenshots of all the text convos bc I couldn’t believe how much it was happening (sad, I know). The same thing happens with in-person approaches. Unmistakable IOIs, beaming smiles when I talk to them, enthusiastically gives me their number, then doesn’t reply to my text or ghosts in the manner above. I really feel like I’m going crazy. I know my SMV isn’t the issue. I don’t particularly think my game/social skills is the issue (but def needs more work).

My theory was that maybe these girls think I’m out of their league and they reject themselves. But that doesn’t explain the last minute flakes. And most of these girls are 9s – they shouldn’t feel that way. My other theory is that they just smell something on me. Like they can smell my drought or lack of abundance. I truly embrace abundance mentality (even though I don’t have abundance), hold frame, don’t supplicate, and act like I’m the prize. But is there something else that they can sense (given my past history that I explained)?

I guess the main question of this post is, has anyone experienced problems like mine when skyrocketing SMV? 3 years ago when I first applied TRP, my SMV wasn’t as high, but I bedded 9 women, HB6s-8s. But since becoming a “top-tier” man, it seems like everything has gotten exponentially harder. Like maybe they expect top-tier game out of me and I only have mid-level game? I really don’t know.

It’s gotten so bad that I made a fucking AskTRP post. But go ahead, lay into me. I acknowledge that I’m being a bitch. I just needed to vent to anyone but myself and my beta friends who don’t get it.