Hate having to give all this context, but it needs to be done. Basically haven't had sex in over a year, and the last time I tried was with some 5ft Asian chick. I was on cocaine, very tired and it ended up being a traumatic experience. Although, I laughed it off at the time, it fucked me up how wrong it all went.

I basically stopped having sex because of OCD and depression for the last 3 years. The more depressed I became, the less of a libido I had - I just full stop wasn't interested in fucking anyone after a while which messed up my self esteem as well because I've spent my entire life fucking.

I was extremely confident in my sexuality before all of this. Even if I was lacking confidence in some other areas, I always knew that when it came time to fuck, I'd get what I want and I'd do it well. But after all this depression and low libido shit, plus that one bad experience I attempted, my sexual confidence is basically gone and I worry about it a lot.

I'm planning to meet some girls that I've been warming up, but I'm hesitant as fuck. I'm worried I'll meet them and will either not feel horny enough, or won't be able to escalate properly. There's so much anxiety around this. I don't know how to get out of my head and just go back to being how I was before.