SHIT TEST < SOMEONE BREAK IT DOWN

NPIF · 2015-05-25T14:02:06+00:00

When it doubt, ignoring shit tests is generally a safe move. I initially read this as being a comfort test, but after re reading that SHE brought up the compliment to you and that she claimed the younger guy thought she was a '10' means it's 100% a shit test. She wanted to make you jealous. She wanted to reaffirm that she's hot to other men, and knock you down a few pegs in the process.

I think ignoring her was the safe play. Especially her follow up message saying she's not going anywhere. Your silence will get her hamster spinning and she'll understand you won't be manipulated into jealousy.

If she brings it up in person, your next move will be to agree and amplify. If she asks what you thought about a younger guy trying to date your girlfriend, you respond with something humorous that encourages her to leave with him.

Remember, she's not the prize, you are. Keep it light hearted, but don't keep ignoring it if she continues to bring it up. Shut it down, tease her and make her laugh while you do it.

[deleted] · 2015-05-25T14:24:08+00:00

You ignored it. I don't think you played it wrong. The shit test here is that she's trying to see if you'll start acting jealous, insecure, or needy. However, this doesn't mean that she's not truly feeling flattered, and that just because she said she's only interested in you, means she won't cheat that very night, or at least won't keep contact with that guy 100%.

On a side note, that very message of her telling you not to be upset and that she's not interested in anyone else, is very likely just a setup to make you react the way she wants, i.e., upset and jealous.

The shit about a girl telling their boyfriend about someone being interested in them, and then the unsolicited reassurances, are happening so commonly to other guys that it's just quite annoying to see.

At the same time, that very thing of enjoying the attention of a guy that is different from her boyfriend, and then subsequently giving the boyfriend shit for it, are both predictable when it comes to women. Because women love attention (especially sexual or romantic attention) from men and people in general, because it validates their desirabiliy, thus, almost their entire being in general. And by instincts, the woman who is attached to you/your woman will forever try to find a chink in your armor until the day you die, because that is how their insticts try to ask for an unconscious reassurance that you are still a 'man'.

balalasaurus · 2015-05-25T15:57:32+00:00

"Oh no I was just about to go cry in the shower."

Ignoring it wasn't a bad move but making it a bit more playful would have been better.

SPARTA127 · 2015-05-25T16:05:17+00:00

I don't know about you , but if a 21 year old comes after your girlfriend it's laughable. My reply would have been. Well he must have terrible taste in women. This would either make her laugh or get her hamster spinning. As a mid 20 something I can tell you older guys are the hardest to compete with because they typically have more experience/money/status.

puamua · 2015-05-25T17:24:10+00:00

Just ignore it, she's trying to get your emotions rolling with this one, don't bother with it at all and it'll go away.

IllimitableMan · 2015-05-26T01:35:58+00:00

You did fine. Don't sweat it. She's a woman being a woman, running her standard mind games.

http://illimitablemen.com/2014/12/14/the-shit-test-encyclopedia/

Ignore – Provide no acknowledgement of the shit test by ignoring it. This is a bad choice when you have just met someone, but once your reputation and/or superiority has been established it is a great way of nonchalantly invalidating the importance of an enquiry. It implies “what you said isn’t even worth addressing.” This is best used on people who are lower in the pecking order than you are or as a response to the manifestation of stupidity. If someone asked you if you liked to eat your own excrement, you could have a joke and agree and amplify into something about a sewer using your keen knowledge of word association and semantic fields, or rather simply you could ignore the inanity of the question. The choice of style is yours to make and will be contingent on your mood, your relative social positions in relation to one another and what you suspect the shit tester’s intent is.

mrpoopistan · 2015-05-26T03:55:15+00:00

You should have asked her to find out if he was gay, because why else would he want an old, leather handbag?

Your GF is making friends with the wall. What she was really hoping was that you might show some aggressive mate guarding tendencies in order to juice up her own feelings about herself.

I somehow doubt that she was getting all wet after he went full beta by:

1) Asking permission. (It's ~~better~~ more alpha to beg forgiveness than to ask permission.)

2) Over-complimenting. (Ermagerd! Sheez a fool-blewn 10!)

She liked the attention, and she was hoping to double down on it by getting you to display some mate guarding.

I would have been a complete prick, but I have little tolerance for the pre-wall, "welcome to your 30s" emotional breakdown shit that women that age pull.

She tells me don't get upset

Piece of advice . . . women will fuckin fake drama, especially if you're failing to supply it. They fake it more in their 30s, because they can feel the emotional high of men fighting over them slipping away.

Title	SHIT TEST < SOMEONE BREAK IT DOWN
Author	hopeyougood
Upvotes	7
Comments	10
Date	May 25, 2015 1:49 PM UTC (11 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/377b90/shit_test_someone_break_it_down/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/shit-test-someone-break-it-down.149326 https://theredarchive.com/post/149326

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