I'm 30 dating a 21 year old Asian immigrant and nursing student. She lives with her parents, has a curfew, no real friends/social circle, doesn't drink, party, go out or do drugs. We have been dating for 7 months and have met each other's families multiple times. I spent Thanksgiving with her family and she spent Christmas with mine.

Overall, the relationship has been pretty good. Sex is getting better every week. Our libidos are both high and we speak the same "love languages" (physical touch and words of affirmation). She cooks for me every chance she gets and she pays for meals when we go out despite me making 4x her salary. Her family values are strong, maybe to a fault, and I am her first real relationship.

However, one big problem we've dealt with is her mood swings when she is on birth control. She got on hormonal BC pill a few months after we started dating, and her emotions were crazy. She would start stupid fights every few days and act immature, spiteful and petty over the dumbest things.

For example, one night we were chatting on the phone and she said she wanted to video chat. I told her nah I don't feel like it right now, and she said if we don't video chat then I'm not seeing you tomorrow (a pre-planned date we had). I was dumbfounded but she meant it. The next morning I confirmed she did not want to see me and she said no I do not "because you couldn't even video chat with me last night."

So after many of these types of issues she got off the BC and her moods went back to mostly stable. Then she decided to get on the hormonal IUD due to some medical history she's had with ovarian cysts. So she gets on the hormonal IUD and everything is cool for a couple of weeks. I'm thinking, wow this BC method is great, no issues besides her heavy period.

But after about 4 weeks on it, she has started slipping into her old ways. We've argued 3x in the past 10 days over the dumbest shit. Our latest argument was this: We see each other twice per week, on Weds and Fri. On Monday she tells me she can't come over Fri because it's her brother's birthday weekend and her mom wants her to spend Friday with the family. I tell her ok cool and immediately make plans to go snowboarding with my friends on Friday instead. Thursday she hits me up and tells me that her family is taking her brother out on Sunday instead of Friday, so she is free on Friday and asks if I'm still going snowboarding. I tell her yes and she says she wants to come with us. I tell her no because I haven't hung out with my guy friends in a while and it's just going to be a guys' day. She immediately shuts down and when I talk to her on the phone that night, she is pissed off. Complaining about how bad of a day she had, how her boss yelled at her at work, and her dad yelled at her over some textbook/money situation they're having, and now I'm going to be having fun with my friends without her while she sits at home all day with nothing to do.

I put on my boyfriend hat and listened and emphasized with her stresses and problems. But she maintained her coldness and when I told her that if I was there, I'd give her a big hug, she started complaining about me not living closer to her, and how I live an hour away and when am I going to move closer to her city, she is tired of only seeing me twice per week and her girlfriends at work see their boyfriends 4x per week.

At this point I got angry and told her she was being ungrateful and should stop comparing our relationship to others. I told her that I do a lot for us and that she shouldn't be complaining. It's not my fault that your plans got moved around and you have nothing to do on Friday, I told her. When I told her that I love her, she said "I don't love you right now" and we got off the phone pissed at each other, me saying I'll talk to you tomorrow and she said "don't bother." I woke up the next day (Friday) and before heading out to snowboard, shot her a funny dog meme to try and bury the hatchet. She read it but no response and she hasn't reached back out to me since Thursday night.

OK so I know that she is overly sensitive and emotional when on this fucking birth control. I seriously doubt she would be acting this way without the hormonal IUD. However, she is adamant that she is NOT going to take the IUD out because it causes so much pain and she just got it put in.

I'm considering giving her a straight up ultimatum about the IUD or me leaving, because I really do not want to be in a relationship with a girl who acts like this. Besides these meltdowns, she is a loyal girlfriend and we care about each other a lot. I know that I hold the cards because she has mentioned several times how she loves me more than I love her and she feels like I don't love her as much as she would like. (I maintain the "golden ratio" very strictly with her and only say I love you once for every 3 times she does for example) She also initiates 90% of our text convos and says "I miss you" and "I love you" way more than I do.

So what do you think guys, what is the best course of action? I haven't made an attempt to reach out to her since yesterday morning with the meme and I don't know how long she is going to stew over this bullshit.