Looking for some feedback on a situation with my wife that I recently encountered.

I just recently accepted a promotion to 2nd shift from 1st. I did this for two reasons, the increase in pay, and for professional development and a shot at a better future position.
My wife works 4 hours a day during the week and stays at home with kids the rest of the time. The shift is basically noon to 4.

She wants to switch to a different facility because she thinks there will be “less BS”. It’s essentially the same job, and same pay, but a different time 7 AM to noon. She came to me with this as a suggestion because she is unhappy where she’s at now. The benefits that she illustrated for me, for her switch, were no day care costs – because I would be home in the daytime- and better job satisfaction, and more hours for her.

My biggest issues are that I would see her basically 2 hours a day, would be tied up every day with children, would be shorted on sleep since I would have to be up every day at 7 after getting home at 11, and the lack of free time to lift, work at home, etc. I brought my issues up to her, and her response was that it should be fine, since that is what she does every day, and that their shouldn’t be a double standard, keeping in mind here that I usually work 9-10 hours a day to her 4. And she also responded that I was more pissed that I got no “me time.” I told her if she wanted everything to be equal she can go get a full time job, and that the only time there is a “double standard” is when it’s affecting her, otherwise I have no problems working more and with things the way they are, and left it at that.

My thoughts are that she is trying to reclaim more of her own time from watching kids, by shuffling it off on to me. I don’t think this is really about equality, as much as it is about her getting out of the house more.

Any thoughts on how I can squash this permanently?

Thanks