What does it mean when you keep getting ASD behavior in private?

lietruth · 2017-01-02T18:39:46+00:00

I'm not making a move so she ain't resisting me

Here's the problem. She's not giving LMR or ASD. There's nothing for her to resist yet. Make a move in the car. Escalate. Go for drinks after work. Polarize like the north baby.

Women don't want to put themselves out there to get rejected. She seems like she's flirting all day with you and wants something more. Give her a way to feel free with you. Not like she's just randomly driving a guy home from work. Sounds like she wants a no strings attached kind of setup but won't want to explicitly communicate it.

vorverk · 2017-01-02T20:27:13+00:00

Act, man. She has given you plenty of signs over the day. She doesn't know how to act when you're alone. She is just thinking "for fucks sake, will he do something now or what?". Just go for it man.

"If men knew all that women think, they would be twenty times more audacious."

Alphonse Karr

Musicgoon · 2017-01-02T18:48:00+00:00

Look bro, call her bluff. Be a man about it. If the dirty talk ceases when you two are alone it could be that she's just angling for attention. Or you're actually insulting her by not making a move.

You need to physically escalate. Kino man. Every time I spend time with a plate I start off with a hug or give her a kiss on the cheek. Just let them know you're comfortable with touch. They should be too.

If you don't make a move, someone else will. Sack up and escalate! 😉

ThatKassiusGuy · 2017-01-02T22:49:28+00:00

Make a move.

Oh wait do you work with her? Don't make a move then.

blackedoutfast · 2017-01-02T23:28:26+00:00

don't wait on a "green light" / IOI. it's not her job to give you a green light, her job is to give you a red light. you're a man and you should always assume that you have a green light. if you escalate and she says "NO" or moves away from you, respect that. but until she tells you to stop, always keep pushing forward.

if she actually wants to bang and isn't just wanting you to be an orbiter/ workhusband you just need a pretext to get her back to your place to bang:

get something really interesting/unique for your place if you don't already. actually fill your place with neat shit. cool art, rare bottles of alcohol, an awesome stereo, huge tv, really old book, or a million other things. it doesn't have to be expensive, just unique and interesting.
the rest of this is based on you having a neato piece of art. if you don't have anything you can go to one of those weekend art festivals and buy a random painting. something super artsy. modern/abstract shit is good. this will work for other non-painting items, just tweak the relevant details.
when you are flirting with her at work during the day and she is all giggling and happy, casually mention that cool thing at your place. "oh hey, you're into art right? i got a really cool painting this weekend. i think you would love it." then move on to some other bullshit. don't bring it up again. if she brings it up again, just say it's awesome but it's hard to describe without seeing it. if she says art is lame, just say you need to see it to understand.
later when she is driving you home, say "yo, park right there. you're not in a hurry to get home are you? come in real quick so i can show you that painting i was talking about."
go in, and take your shoes off by the door. it doesn't matter if you normally wear shoes in the house, you're doing this so she will take her shoes off and it will be harder for her to look at the painting and just bounce out.
throw your keys, wallet, phone on a table or somewhere so she can put her purse down too. if you can quickly and easily start playing some chill background music (phone/chromecast or alexa are good for this) do that.
go into the kitchen and get out two glasses and while you are pouring say "i need a drink. you want a glass of wine? i'm trying to finish this open bottle before it goes bad." bullshit about the wine for a bit and shift back into the flirty game type rapport you have at work. tease her, light kino. if she's really DTF, sometimes this turns into makeout session then sex and you can skip the rest.
if she is still being neutral at this point or acting antsy or weird say "oh yeah let's go check out the painting" START ESCALATING THE KINO: put your hand on the small of your back and guide her to your bedroom because that's where the painting is lol.
- guide her to the painting so you're standing behind her, VERY close. leave your hand on the small of her back and reach over her shoulder with your other arm and start pointing at random parts of the painting. lean in and start quietly saying bullshit about art into her ear. it literally doesn't matter what you say, she isn't paying attention to the words anymore. start kissing her neck and if she doesn't pull away transition from into making out then fucking.
as an alternate to the painting, if you were telling her about your baller music system or tv you can bring her over to the sofa and then escalate your kino there. it's the same basic idea. listening to music or watching youtube videos is a little less effective to use as a pretext to get her inside but once she is inside it gives you more options for dealing with LMR.
if she ever moves away from kino, pushes you away, says no, etc. do not get mad, don't argue, don't apologize, don't ask questions, don't say anything about her flirting with you at work, don't act butthurt in any way. let her move away but other than that don't even acknowledge it.
if she ever actually gets up and leaves, there's your redlight and you need to respect it. she was just playing you for an orbiter/workhusband. no big deal though, it's just part of the game.
if she moves away from kino but doesn't leave, it's just LMR and she does want to fuck. you can consider that as a yellowlight if you want to continue that analogy. drop back to whatever level of kino she was comfortable with and stay there for a couple of minutes. then escalate again. some girls will want to do this up and down LMR stuff for hours.

failingtheturingtest · 2017-01-03T03:40:53+00:00

Sounds like you need to listen to the advice of a Rastafarian cartoon lobster written for children.

Title	What does it mean when you keep getting ASD behavior in private?
Author	Csdx1
Upvotes	5
Comments	30
Date	January 2, 2017 6:26 PM UTC (9 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/5lmp5a/what_does_it_mean_when_you_keep_getting_asd/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/what-does-it-mean-when-you-keep-getting-asd.80121 https://theredarchive.com/post/80121

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