Why I shouldnt validate her?

TheCrimsonTablet · 2016-03-13T16:17:42+00:00

Your ability to give validation is your equivalent to sex. If she gives sex with zero commitment, then you have no reason to give more commitment. If you give validation with zero sex, she has no reason to give more sex.

Reddened · 2016-03-14T08:04:09+00:00

It gives her the impression that she has you; she's already won you over. If it's that easy for her to impress you, how high status/alpha are you really?

It can be just strictly a shit-test you need to pass, but sometimes (depending on her body language and tone) she's actually also saying "I'm into you, and I'm wondering how much you're into me." It's a good opportunity to bring her into your frame and condition her to realize she needs to actually win you over, rather than vice versa.

You could go the ignore/change subject route: "What like special-ed? Yeah I didn't want to say anything but you really took awhile to get that last joke earlier..."

Or what's better is to tell her what she would need to do to be considered special to you (assuming this is a newer courtship): "The last girl I considered did X,Y,Z (definitely throw something sexual in there), so I don't know I guess I will find out amused wink". That might even be a bit too obvious, but you get the idea.

All_Ads_Deceive · 2016-03-14T09:24:29+00:00

Told her she was special Ed

hailhailhailandkill · 2016-03-14T15:33:25+00:00

Validation brings slackness and upper hand. Then she'll take you for granted and look down on you. Once she's too comfortable, you'll underachieve and it will take longer.

Negging, bringing her into line, calling her out on misbehaviors, shaming etc are fine tools for preventing slackness.

RedAsBlood · 2016-03-14T18:21:21+00:00

Validating / complimenting is demonstrating lower value. I.e you are saying she is better than you.

Women don't fuck down.

Title	Why I shouldnt validate her?
Author	Elfclan30
Upvotes	1
Comments	6
Date	March 13, 2016 4:00 PM UTC (10 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/4a8sce/why_i_shouldnt_validate_her/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/why-i-shouldnt-validate-her.161957 https://theredarchive.com/post/161957

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