Being non-reactive...

FriendlyAdviceMan · 2011-09-22T07:48:00+00:00

It's easy to picture when a man ignores a neg from a girl, but think about it this way...

What if you're playful with a woman, teasing her and calling her names, and then she suddenly dons her stern cap and says, "Listen, I'm not going to sleep with you."

And then you respond, "Hah, you look like a cute little hamster when you put your serious face on!"

The answer you give her is in line with your internal state. She can't affect you because you're non reactive, even though you're still push-pulling her. If she is attracted to you and wants you, or she's isn't sure but intrigued, she can't keep her frame up.

This is the same reason why it's intimidating to stare somebody straight in the eye when they're trying to start fight. The internal state is, in our psychology, a better indicator of fitness than simply appearing strong and powerful.

frogma · 2011-09-22T14:53:12+00:00

Non-reactive basically just means you don't respond defensively when someone's being a bitch to you. Whatever your internal state is, it never changes. So when someone tries to disrupt your state in any way, you have a strong frame and your state remains unchanged. And instead of seeking value from other people, you provide value to them. If you're seeking value, your frame will get thrown off any time something bad or unexpected happens. If you're just providing value, anything can happen, and you'll still be providing value.

Ignoring the insult/discouragement? Playing it off as no big deal?

Both are solid options. It kinda depends on the situation and what you feel like doing at the time. I don't think anyone is "non-reactive" 100% of the time, so don't get in your own head trying to make sure you say all the right things. But keep trying to improve that mindset to the point where it's just naturally how you handle situations.

Also focus on becoming self-validated (kinda the same thing as non-reactive/value-giving). When you're self-validated, you're simply happy with who you are and happy with your situation, no matter what happens and no matter what anyone tries to do to disrupt that notion. Which basically means you can provide value even in the worst of situations- with AMOGs that's especially helpful.

TheMortifydPUA · 2011-09-22T04:34:51+00:00

For me, that means not affecting my internal state (I'm still feelin and acting awesome, and truly), and also not affecting how I am on the outside too.

WaywardPatriot · 2011-09-22T07:48:20+00:00

I don't always react to situations, but when I do it is because I am the coolest man in the world.

MidnightThunderboy · 2011-09-22T10:33:24+00:00

Whatever

jrrak · 2011-09-22T23:23:42+00:00

here is an example of how I beat a shit test. I was a this small college bar, and i forget how I ended up talking to this chick and some of her friends but I end up asking her name.

She gives me what I think was a shit test and tells me that "I have a vodka over there." ( referring to an area of the bar) and Just totally ignoring my question.

Not missing a beat I respond " Ihaveavodkaoverthere? Is that a family name?"

Obviously its not but it shows I am not bothered by her shit test.

RedPens · 2011-09-22T03:49:20+00:00

Have you tried not giving a fuck?

Title	Being non-reactive...
Author	TheMortifydPUA
Upvotes	4
Comments	11
Date	September 22, 2011 3:03 AM UTC (14 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/knhox/being_nonreactive/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/being-non-reactive.1322837 https://theredarchive.com/post/1322837

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