Hello all, In my pursuit of being of self development, I believe I've come to a cross roads. To give bit of a back story, I used to be a very quite and angry loner kid in high school and in early college. Though I had few friends, people did find me more interesting, and females also found me more interesting as well. Underneath my dark shroud however, was a goofy guy.

I developed my social skills, by reading books "How to win friends and influence" and going to a lot of business network events, to find a job.

So the push was really to be "extroverted", and to sort of go after people. As a result, I find now I have become very reactive, and I'm always asking too many questions, and I feel I talk a lot and possibly show too much enthusiasm. I think this has helped me find jobs, but it hasn't done much to help people's perception of me as being cool.

So i'm thinking, do I need to start work on being more "Suave". As in being Unreactive and aloof, and unconcerned with other people. How would I balance that?