Confidence

JacobMoogberg69 · 2022-01-12T21:20:16+00:00

If there is one thing I've learned in my 40 years on this earth is that attraction isn't something you do, it's something that you are. You can only fake it for a short time before the woman finds out and feels used that you misrepresented yourself. It's not different than a woman pretending to be interested in you so she could get you to buy her dinner or take her on a nice trip. Just long enough to extract resources out of you. You are essentially doing the same thing, trying to pass off as a confident man only to try and extract sex out of women.

The reality is that confidence is not something that comes from outside. It's not something acquired by external successes because a lot people are successful externally but inside they feel dead. Only you can award yourself confidence. Do you know why you are having trouble awarding yourself confidence? Because you don't like and accept yourself. You don't want to reward someone you disdain.

So start with the idea of liking and accepting yourself first. Awarding yourself confidence will come later. And then you won't have to fake anything.

Therocksays2020 · 2022-01-12T21:09:48+00:00

You’re putting the cart before the horse. Your focus should be on building attraction.

You don’t need to tell a woman you’re a virgin or never kissed someone until you actually. You don’t need to tell them you don’t have friends. These are things you should talk to a counselor about. A woman doesn’t need to be your therapist. Especially before you’re even fucking dating

MoStuntin · 2022-01-12T21:19:13+00:00

Go gym watch the muscle u make give u confidence

slenderman404 · 2022-01-12T23:29:04+00:00

Do things that will make yourself proud. For example, if you promised yourself you will do something today, do it and you will build self respect that way. Slowly, you will be proud of yourself and realize you're the shit.

Also, I find that saying to myself "be more confident" is so abstract to understand. Instead, tell yourself to not be result oriented. "It is what it is". Do things cause you want to and be ok with not getting what you want. The sooner you understand that everything is not for you and to just go with the flow, the faster your life will become better. Good luck on your journey!

Calamity__Bane · 2022-01-12T21:21:58+00:00

How I’m I supposed to be a man with a girl, but at the same time tell her that I’m a virgin, that I’ve never kissed or grabbed hands, that I’ve missed out on all of those things? How do I look her dead in the eye and tell her that the truth is that I do not do well socially and that I really have no friends at all?

The problem isn't so much these things as it is the fact that you're bothered by them. I could say all of those things to a girl (except maybe, in some situations, the bit about having no friends) and still come across as confident, partly because none of them are true of me, but more importantly, because I don't care, and the rest of my behavior is congruent with that. Obviously, you don't need to tell anyone the above if the situation doesn't call for it, but it's definitely possible to do so and still be confident.

AnAngelOfVengeance · 2022-01-13T05:42:57+00:00

Confidence is assumed acceptance

Title	Confidence
Author	TostaditaFeliz
Upvotes	12
Comments	12
Date	January 12, 2022 9:04 PM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/s2gwla/confidence/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/confidence.1269165 https://theredarchive.com/post/1269165

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