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[–]1keentolearn12 5 points6 points7 points 4 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
Get tested. You can normally get a result within 24 hours
Please don’t play Russian roulette with a potential STI
[–]AnonymousAdvice11 1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
The incubation period for most STI is at least a week though. So getting tested 2-3 days later may not detect anything
[–]1keentolearn12 3 points4 points5 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Wear a condom or get tested.
[–]Canadian-Seductioner 5 points6 points7 points 4 years ago (10 children) | Copy Link
It is extremely unlikely that you caught anything, especially since she was very clear about saying she was clean.
Up to you whether you want to tell her that you went raw with someone else, but I honestly think you're fine to just go business as usual with her and forget about it.
I usually wear protection with every new girl, but once in a while I will slip up. Nobody's perfect and sometimes you're just in the moment. After a few times with the same girl though, I'll bring up losing the condoms.
[–]AnonymousAdvice11 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (8 children) | Copy Link
See the comment from u/no-reporter3692
Thoughts?
[–]No-Reporter3692 6 points7 points8 points 4 years ago (6 children) | Copy Link
At 34 I’ve just learned to live my life with integrity and to deal with the consequences of that in stride. Just tell her and do the right thing here and accept the outcome. That’s pretty much what being a man means to me. You can handle anything so why run from it?
[–]AnonymousAdvice11 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (5 children) | Copy Link
Totally get what you're saying. Also understand what u/Canadian-Seductioner is saying.
God this is stressful
[–]No-Reporter3692 2 points3 points4 points 4 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link
Having unprotected sex without knowing you are clean and purposely NOT telling another sexual partner about it is wrong. It’s unethical and people who do this lack integrity. This is not up for debate. What kind of person do you want to be?
[–]AnonymousAdvice11 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
Never in the situation was I going to have unprotected sex with the girl this week. It was either no sex at all or wear a condom and have a potentially awkward conversation.
[–]No-Reporter3692 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
It’s still wrong to have sex with a condom without disclosing it to her if you don’t know you are clean.
[–]AnonymousAdvice11 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Well I just got tested today. Nurse said testing after 48 hours from exposure is very accurate so I’ll know if I’m clean by tomorrow night 👍🏼
[–]No-Reporter3692 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Great. I think that solves your question if it comes back negative then.
[–]Canadian-Seductioner 1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Difference of opinion 🤷
[–]BensonInFL1 point 4 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link
I agree, there is a fairly low probability that she was lying.
Even if the girl is not clean, its not guaranteed that you will catch what she has. Recent statistics say that if a girl is HIV positive, you have a 0.05% - 0.1% chance of getting it per sexual act, HSV2 is 1.5 times per 10,000 acts. Some of the other ones are higher like clamydia 4.5% and syphlys is over 50%, but these are also treatable.
but I honestly think you're fine to just go business as usual with her and forget about it.
That's what I would do as well.
-B
[–]imahoaxandacoach 7 points8 points9 points 4 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
You should always use a condom. With both chicks. If you dont use one with this one you could be endangering her health. And yes if you get testes now it wont necessarily show anything, every disease has its own "incubation" period until a test can detect.
Use a condom.
[–]imahoaxandacoach 1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
And BTW yes, I always wear a condom until 2 or 3 months after being exclusive and both being tested.
[–]AnonymousAdvice11 2 points3 points4 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Thanks for the advice. You’ll use a condom for 2-3 months after even once you’re exclusive?
[–]imahoaxandacoach 2 points3 points4 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Yes. Like I said, some things take time to be detectable by tests, this way we both ensure we are protected. One test right after being exclusive and one 2 or 3 months after the first one, then if both all clean I can sto0 using a condom. But hey thats me.
[–]DarkBeforeDawn16 4 years ago [recovered] (7 children) | Copy Link
Just use a condom dude. It’s really that simple.
[–]AnonymousAdvice11 1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (6 children) | Copy Link
You’re talking about this week with the girl I like? Or just stating the obvious in general 😂
[–]DarkBeforeDawn16 4 years ago [recovered] (5 children) | Copy Link
Just in general. Unless your cool with child support or stds that’s your choice tho.
[–]AnonymousAdvice11 1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link
Yeah fair enough. With my last girlfriend she had an IUD so obviously didn’t feel the need.
Do you just always carry condoms with you? This past encounter I didn’t have one with me
[–]No_Inspection_7176 2 points3 points4 points 4 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
I just want to point out that IUDs aren’t always effective, two of my friends have got pregnant with an IUD in and correctly placed by an OBGYN. The official stats are around 8/1000 but I suspect there’s more that just aren’t reported, other forms of bc are obviously even less effective because of user error. Don’t play Russian roulette with your life and your health, every time you’re thinking of going raw with someone you wouldn’t want a baby with just picture transferring over a sizeable portion of your paycheque for your child and that’ll set you straight or potentially getting an STD that will crimp your sex life forever.
[–]AnonymousAdvice11 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
Thanks for this. I know it’s never a 0% chance anytime you go raw.
Crazy that you know 2 ppl who have still gotten pregnant with IUDs. Definitely thought it was less than 8/1000 but again, it’s not 0%
[–]No_Inspection_7176 1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Just from anecdotal evidence I suspect birth control failure rates are a lot higher than studies suggest. I’ve seen a few peoples lives torpedoed by surprise pregnancies (both men and women) and have taken several friends to the sexual health clinic in college and watched them get an antibiotic shot in the bum because of drunken dumbassery. Please be honest with your sexual partner and look after your own sexual health, wishing you all the best.
[–]AnonymousAdvice11 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Thank you, really appreciate this.
[–]wj2smooth 1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Statistically you’re likely fine from the major stds. Morally, you are putting her at risk and on the off chaNce that you do give her something you’re setting yourself up for a much more difficult conversation, and you’d probably feel shitty. Personally, I’d refrain especially if your results don’t come back in time. She’d understand if you just didn’t wanna have sex or wanted to “wait for a more intimate setting”
[–]copiumtrafficker 3 points4 points5 points 4 years ago* (2 children) | Copy Link
If you want to potentially have a relationship with her you need to be upfront and honest.
Tell her that you got drunk and had unprotected sex but aren’t out of the window where tests will be useful.
She should appreciate the honesty and can make her decisions based on all of the information.
If she has some huge negative reaction then she’s proven herself to not be a good potential partner. She could either be mad at you for having sex with others which is completely fair game for you both to be doing or be mad at you for bringing this information up at all. Both of those things are bad signs for the type of person they are.
Alternatively she will react normally or neutral. She will appreciate that you’re looking out for her sexual health and safety. She will either decide to wait if it’s worth while or she will offer to use condoms until you can get fully tested.
The reaction to information is almost always more important than keeping the information to yourself.
[–]AnonymousAdvice11 1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Thanks for this. Appreciate the response. Probably the best way to go.
Even though it terrifies me to think about having to tell her
[–]No-Reporter3692 1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
You shouldn’t have unprotected sex with strangers. You NEED to tell the girl you’re seeing and accept her course of action respectfully. I would stop seeing a woman if she had unprotected sex with a stranger while we were seeing each other. That’s a huge red flag dude and speaks to a level of irresponsible behavior that most people will not accept.
[–]AnonymousAdvice11 -1 points0 points1 point 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I don’t disagree. I didn’t plan on this occurring, and if I wasn’t seeing this girl I would just chalk it up as a slip up, get tested and move on.
[–]Space_Ape420 1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago* (3 children) | Copy Link
Don’t go skydiving without a parachute
I wouldn’t be taking that kind of risk especially with randoms.
[–]AnonymousAdvice11 -1 points0 points1 point 4 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
Totally get that. I know using condoms is the way to go, I just slipped up this past weekend and I didn't ejaculate so I know there's no pregnancy risk from this encounter. But as always, I know I need to use protection.
[–]Space_Ape420 1 point2 points3 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Just so you’re aware, pre-cum can still cause pregnancy so the risk isn’t nil.
But nonetheless, it seems like you learned your lesson. Get tested & move on chief
For sure. I actually went soft half way into things and stopped once I realized the situation I’d gotten myself into (meaning this week) so I’m not concerned about pregnancy but totally right. Condoms every time
[–]IOnlyCameToArgue 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Fuck it, roll the dice. We all gotta die sometime.
[–]ModeratorElbynerual 2 points3 points4 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Username checks out
[–]Mustafa_Kamel 0 points1 point2 points 4 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
condoms, slow down your pace of sex. don't be so neurotic
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[–]1keentolearn12 5 points6 points7 points (2 children) | Copy Link
[–]AnonymousAdvice11 1 point2 points3 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]1keentolearn12 3 points4 points5 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]Canadian-Seductioner 5 points6 points7 points (10 children) | Copy Link
[–]AnonymousAdvice11 0 points1 point2 points (8 children) | Copy Link
[–]No-Reporter3692 6 points7 points8 points (6 children) | Copy Link
[–]AnonymousAdvice11 0 points1 point2 points (5 children) | Copy Link
[–]No-Reporter3692 2 points3 points4 points (4 children) | Copy Link
[–]AnonymousAdvice11 0 points1 point2 points (3 children) | Copy Link
[–]No-Reporter3692 0 points1 point2 points (2 children) | Copy Link
[–]AnonymousAdvice11 0 points1 point2 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]No-Reporter3692 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]Canadian-Seductioner 1 point2 points3 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]BensonInFL1 point [recovered] | Copy Link
[–]imahoaxandacoach 7 points8 points9 points (3 children) | Copy Link
[–]imahoaxandacoach 1 point2 points3 points (2 children) | Copy Link
[–]AnonymousAdvice11 2 points3 points4 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]imahoaxandacoach 2 points3 points4 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]DarkBeforeDawn16 [recovered] (7 children) | Copy Link
[–]AnonymousAdvice11 1 point2 points3 points (6 children) | Copy Link
[–]DarkBeforeDawn16 [recovered] (5 children) | Copy Link
[–]AnonymousAdvice11 1 point2 points3 points (4 children) | Copy Link
[–]No_Inspection_7176 2 points3 points4 points (3 children) | Copy Link
[–]AnonymousAdvice11 0 points1 point2 points (2 children) | Copy Link
[–]No_Inspection_7176 1 point2 points3 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]AnonymousAdvice11 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]wj2smooth 1 point2 points3 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]copiumtrafficker 3 points4 points5 points (2 children) | Copy Link
[–]AnonymousAdvice11 1 point2 points3 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]AnonymousAdvice11 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]No-Reporter3692 1 point2 points3 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]AnonymousAdvice11 -1 points0 points1 point (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]Space_Ape420 1 point2 points3 points (3 children) | Copy Link
[–]AnonymousAdvice11 -1 points0 points1 point (2 children) | Copy Link
[–]Space_Ape420 1 point2 points3 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]AnonymousAdvice11 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]IOnlyCameToArgue 0 points1 point2 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]ModeratorElbynerual 2 points3 points4 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]Mustafa_Kamel 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link