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[–]Moderatorrecyclablebantha 1 point2 points3 points 11 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
Guy A: Asks the girl if he can borrow something from this girl. Girl says yes, and then he proceeds to ask for her phone number so he can tell her when to return it. She agrees and he gets her number. Yay?
No no no no NO.
This is indirect. The underlying assumption is that you aren't good enough so you have to almost trick her into dating you. It's showing a lack of confidence and it'd be creepy to the girl if you're trying to be that roundabout in what you want.
Just ask for her damn number and give her yours at the same time. Then you can say, "Yay."
Guy B: This guy straight up walks up to the girl, "Hey I think you're really cute, could I get your number?" And she straight up gives it to him.
This interaction would mean little to the girl, so this isn't what you shoot for either. You should have some sort of conversation, even if it's short. And you must be actively listening. Or else you'll have no freaking clue if she gave you the number to make you go away, or whether she actually wants to see you again.
So both guys got the number, but is there a big difference in the two?
No difference in the sense that both approaches are incorrect. One is indirect and the other completely ignores connection or attentiveness of any kind.
I mean eventually both girls willingly gave out their number, correct?
Girls give out their numbers or fake numbers, just to make people go away.
......can't both of these guys build something from this?
No. The foundation would be lacking in both cases and both would have handicaps in their efforts to move forward.
[–]DullPencil1 points 11 years ago [recovered] (1 child) | Copy Link
So is option A totally bad in the sense that there's nothing to build off of? I mean you have to start somewhere right? Also, what's wrong with Guy B? I mean it'd be weird if he straight up got her number and then left - so all you're saying is that you need to have a conversation with her/get to know her and she if she's into you?
[–]Moderatorrecyclablebantha 0 points1 point2 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
So is option A totally bad in the sense that there's nothing to build off of?
No. I already said why above.
I mean you have to start somewhere right?
No. Starting off on the wrong foot can often sink you chances if you realize that first impressions are significant and happen rather quickly.
Also, what's wrong with Guy B?
I already said above.
I mean it'd be weird if he straight up got her number and then left - so all you're saying is that you need to have a conversation with her/get to know her and she if she's into you?
Basically. I mentioned the importance of connection, above.
[–]killaswagyolo420 0 points1 point2 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I mean you can ave a number but, if there's no spark between you two, you have nothing. So how you got it does matter.
[–]Lefeudufou 0 points1 point2 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
The number is just a tool to see her again and escalate.
[–]IpickupGrandmothers -1 points0 points1 point 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I think you're presenting a false dichotomy here.
It's not about simply receiving a phone number. Girls give phone numbers all the time. It doesn't mean they're attracted to you, willing to date you, willing to fuck you, whatever. Maybe they gave you a fake number. Or maybe they just gave you a number to get you off their back. Maybe they never plan on picking up the phone.
It's not about just getting a number. It's about creating an emotional connection with her so that she actually likes you and wants to see you again.
[–]tamilgangster -1 points0 points1 point 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
As long if the number is not for academic or work reasons it counts. Remember getting her number is a maybe, you have to play your cards right
[–]Needtotrythis -2 points-1 points0 points 11 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Can you add a third option - I would feel much more comfortable with a guy giving me his #, and not asking for mine. Otherwise, I completely agree with recyclablebantha
[–]spiritualdissonance 0 points1 point2 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I would feel much more comfortable with a guy giving me his #, and not asking for mine.
That's a natural feeling, and guys feel more comfortable with the reverse. Reason being, the person with a number has control. IMO, the best approach is to build up enough of a foundation/initial connection that both of you are interested in connecting again, and then exchanging phone numbers both ways. That way neither person has exclusive "control" of the next interaction, and it's a balanced connection without weird manipulative games or drama. Way more enjoyable, attractive, and seductive.
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[–]Moderatorrecyclablebantha 1 point2 points3 points (2 children) | Copy Link
[–]DullPencil1 points [recovered] (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]Moderatorrecyclablebantha 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]killaswagyolo420 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]Lefeudufou 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]IpickupGrandmothers -1 points0 points1 point (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]tamilgangster -1 points0 points1 point (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]Needtotrythis -2 points-1 points0 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]spiritualdissonance 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link