How do you turn the conversation to sex and flirtiness on Tinder?

WIA20XX · 2019-03-12T13:05:47+00:00

If you're trying to meet up, you don't. Be funny, witty and interesting, and get the girl on a date.

If you are just practicing text skills for a future FWB, ask the girl what she's wearing.

s4ndman1 · 2019-03-12T13:04:40+00:00

Look sexual and flirting is two different things. I hate chatting on the phone so I use flirting to get the number. After that I take her number send a voice note or two and ask her out on a date.

In person I do the sexual chatting.For instance the girl that matched with me last night. She cycles and travels, I am a marathon runner.Me (First message): Dam we can never become an item. I was really looking forward to it to.Her: How so..?Me: Well I am a runner, if I get into trouble you can just hop on your bike and that's it. Then what? Who is going to look after the kids?

Her response was laughter and I was in.

Flirt to get number and setup dates, sexual talk in person.

Edit: Added her response
Edit2: I actually continued reading the rest of the post. Please don't ask her "Why did you swipe right on me?" she swiped right on you because you are a fucking awesome guy that is why. Open with something funny related to her. I was lucky this girl had a well written bio about her self but if she has nothing look for something funny or a relation in her pictures.

HeavyMeringue · 2019-03-12T16:50:51+00:00

Easy.You imply sex but you do not clearly talk about it,you are late to answer text messages and you become a little disagreeable when you actually mean to be disagreeable with valid points and you occasionally troll the girl/guy that you text(ex.-I do not think that I like the shirt from the photo.-Now I know what to wear when we meet lol.).One last thing,no dinner dates,drinks or coffee at a lounge and just to avoid flakes you ask:"You are not one of those girls/women that cancel on the last minute,are you ?".

The-Bogus-Man · 2019-03-12T12:20:47+00:00

Yeah I’ve always struggled with this too. Really curious to get some good tips. I’ve always played it modest, trying to build trust and make sure the girls are comfortable with me (after all, it’s like I’ve just met someone), but the more I read, the more it seems like people on Tinder are just generally receptive to sexual and flirty conversation. It’s hard for me to take the leap but I want to.

recyclablebanthas · 2019-03-13T03:37:48+00:00

1

How do you turn the conversation to sex and flirtiness on Tinder?

You're talking about the function performed by physical escalation, which is only performed in person. Trying to "escalate" over text, comes off desperate unless you're REALLY advanced and have already established a bit of a rapport.

You actually want sex? Then the point is not TEXTING about sex, it's about setting up a meet so you can see if there's chemistry enough for that in person.

And you want to set up that meet? Now we get to the point of texting over Tinder: All you need to do is establish a bit of banter back and forth in a FEW messages, enough to learn about her maybe and establish that you're both human. Then you set a meet; Tinder is there to facilitate strangers meeting each other.

2

I get a good amount of matches but I never treat it as a flirty sexy thing, just have nice chats like I'm talking with a mate. I think this bleeds over a bit into real life too but I'm more concerned with chatting online.

Talking with her like you talk to your mates, is not a bad thing. The bad thing is if you never get to the point and set a meet.

If you beat around the bush about setting a meet, try to awkwardly sext her, etc., then of course you're going to have a bad time.

3

What are some good ways of turning it into a lightly sexual chat?

Yeah, you don't need to do this. And trying to, is one of the easiest ways to fuck yourself out of sex, unless you're already advanced enough that you get reliable results, in which case, you wouldn't need to be posting this. So start off small and work your way up, man.

4

Maybe something like "So why did you swipe right on me?" or "What kind of guys do you like?" and go from there?

These are REALLY unhelpful questions that paint you in a bad light.

Asking why she swiped right is pointless: she swiped right so she could exchange messages with you and see if a meet would be possible or desirable once she started communicating with you.
What kind of guys does she like, is pointless to ask. If she swiped right on you, you ALREADY know that she is at least curious or a little interested in you, so asking this question comes off massively insecure and awkward. It's like asking a guy who came into a McDonald's, "So what kind of food do you like?"

You already know what kind of guy she likes if she swiped right on you and you know why she swiped already. Get on with it man!

You make a little conversation
- Maybe about her profile/pics/etc.
- Maybe about current news/weather where you are; seriously, even the weather can be a good one considering how weird the weather is lately.
You set a damn meet; if you've had a few good messages, just bite the damn bullet. She'll say yes if she's there for a meet. She'll ghost at that point if she's not interested and save you time.

Done.

Errantsquire · 2019-03-12T13:31:18+00:00

The best app I've found to practice pushing sexual boundaries is Whisper because you don't have to worry about burning bridges with girls that live 5k miles away. You're going to need to figure out what your "style" is, and get used to that.

Always be ready to back down and be aware of how the girl is feeling. When I use Whisper I never ask for pictures, because I find that most girls don't have the verbal game that guys do and so when they feel like they need some validation they will push a photo.

Give the girl an experience, don't just talk mechanically. Keep in mind that everything from holding a hand to getting to the bedroom is sexual/sensual. Think about the environment to help her understand the sights/sounds/smells of the experience.

Once you feel comfortable then move your skills over to swipe apps. Like the other guys said though ask yourself what the value of the interaction is if you think the girl will just meet you IRL anyway. I suppose you could use it to tease as a seduction technique, as long as you're being congruent to yourself.

I was really shy about my sexual interests for a while, but I've become more open about it with women much faster than before I started working on this (it used to take me months to open up this way, now usually in the first 1-3 meetings or first week it comes up). The typical responses I get are, "I've never done that/I've never thought about that/that's interesting." So far I've yet to have a woman say, "you're gross and disgusting get away from me." I probably need that to happen honestly.

A pretty causual question you can ask to get the ball rolling is, "how long has it been?" Questions need compliance and so instead you might just try a statement like, "I'm in a sexy mood I feel like talking about sex but I'm shy and we don't have to if you don't want to." She'll either give you a green light or not. If not respect that and move on. Look at it this way, no matter what she says there can be no denying that you think about her in that way "man to woman" which will keep you out of the friend zone or get you blown out.

One last tip. We live in block culture and so if you feel at any point like she's going to block you then simply say this, "It's alright if you block me I won't get mad."

Title	How do you turn the conversation to sex and flirtiness on Tinder?
Author	David-Chapman
Upvotes	20
Comments	11
Date	March 12, 2019 10:54 AM UTC (7 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/b06e80/how_do_you_turn_the_conversation_to_sex_and/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/how-do-you-turn-the-conversation-to-sex-and.1464200 https://theredarchive.com/post/1464200

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