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zaryaguy · 2020-02-05T14:58:06+00:00

I live in a small town. My sister paid for tinder gold, and showed me she got 5000 likes in 1 day. After seeing that, I dont want to even try it lmao.

Cold approach pickup is the only thing that can make you stand out from the 99% of regular dudes on tinder (my opinion)

UneAmi · 2020-02-05T15:31:24+00:00

Online dating really fucked me up when I went back to dating ppl that I met through my social scenes:

Online dating:

-Meeting a girl for beer in a first hangout is considered as a very good start. Some girls even think they are giving guys a pass to fuck them.

After the first hangout, she is either into you or not(just gets one cold text saying bye)

Off-line dating (e.g going out with a classmate who is interested in you):

-Meeting a girl for beer in off-line dating is just a norm. More normal than coffee date.

She will still hang out with you for more dates and gauge if we are emotionally compatiable. (Assuming that this girl doesn't do online dating and not thinking me as a disponsable human being)

I was super stressed out during my offline dating when a classmate invited me for a Japanese bar&food place to hangout one on one. I was trying really hard to figure out if either she is really into me or gonna ghost me forever but that is not how a real relationship works. It takes a time to bond between ppl emotionally and this first hang out did not mean much. Long after this, I learned online dating kills this experience of getting to know ppl sincerely.

And lastly, Fuck all online dating apps and especially the girls who come out for free meal. Pay your own god damn meal if you know that you dont want to see the guy again after the first date. Don't be both poor and indignified. I have seen homeless ppl with more dignity than this.

2020-02-05T21:25:18+00:00

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Workamaholic · 2020-02-05T21:24:15+00:00

I tried online dating for a while. Signed up for match, okcupid, bumble, tinder, and eharmony at the same time. Tried different things on different sites.

From my experience, as you said, most people are not actually looking for anything too serious and sometimes if they are looking they aren’t ready to be in any type of relationship. The phrase online dating is for broken people comes up here every now and again and I don’t agree with that but I understand where it’s coming from.

That being said I met a few people through each site/app and learned a lot along the way.

Eventually I quit all the apps. It was taking too much time and I realized that in every interaction there was an unspoken question that needed an honest answer. The question being, “Are you actively pursuing something (a mission/ purpose) for your own life and not people’s expectations of your life.”

If you don’t have that answered and answered well people will lose interest and Im taking time off to make sure I have a solid answer that I can fight for.

Finally for those online dating. There are three rules that helped me get people out to meet in person. I did manage to do better at converting connections to dates than most and I believe it was because of these things.

Have Good pictures that SAY something about you by showing you doing it. (Think like a marketer that is hired to market you as a dating product. What kind of pictures do you want to show? In my experience most people are awful at this and although it takes effort and a setup the results are huge. Good photographers say you don’t take photos you make them. So make 4-5 good photos of you in your element.
Always Emotionally Communicate! This is hard to get the hang of but it is super important. If what you’re texting doesn’t generate an emotional response don’t text it. Humor is a popular emotion, but intrigue, shock, even sometimes disgust can do well. People use these apps to see how it might feel to connect with you so give them a taste of that. Don’t ask boring questions “How are you?” “What are you doing?”. The answer although seemingly unique is actually boring and people hear these questions 1000’s of times. Make it so the person you’re texting with doesn’t know what will happen next. Keep them guessing. This one takes practice but it is essential online and off.
TELL don’t ask. - Say I want their number. I don’t ask them for it. I tell them to give it to me. I tell them the conversation is over I don’t wait for it to go stale. Women are looking for leaders. People who lead themselves, and then others so if you can’t even lead a conversation what good are you? To this day I don’t ask to go on dates. I say “come with me to do (insert something emotionally intriguing/mysterious) on (x day) at (x time) (x place).

If they don’t want to go they don’t like you or you didn’t build up enough of an emotional connection through communication. So learn from what you did or didn’t do and move on. I have NEVER had a woman who was interested not suggest an alternative or just go on the date this way.

ButtersNut · 2020-02-05T14:24:11+00:00

I don’t use dating apps anymore for other reasons but when I used to use them legitimately it would be because I was in a new city & wanted to find someone fast that seemed like a real date....they pick me up, go out, etc. I don’t usually go out to late night places when I’m by myself traveling so I wouldn’t have the opportunity to meet anyone irl.

Otherwise yes you’re absolutely correct. I’ve paid for the version where I don’t have to match & instead automatically just see who matches me & I regularly get a few hundred matches within an hour or so of downloading the app. I’ve never done the followers thing but 90% of my use is total boredom where even if I did meet anyone it would be unintentional.

But I wanna go ahead and say I’m pretty sure it’s the same way for guys who can actually pick up women in person. If they’re even using those apps at all it’s only to play some fishing game. And don’t think every woman can have anyone she wants. Just reading through dating subs you’ll obviously see there’s plenty of women using those apps actually looking for something real.

**I want to add I have plenty of female friends who do the same things I have done on those apps out of boredom & curiosity

taternator25 · 2020-02-05T18:58:08+00:00

I have a decent amount of success on tinder and bumble. I rarely ever message first. I have a breaking rapport kind of bio. It says "professional asshole. no, you can't drive my Jeep". Usually they open with asking why I consider myself a professional asshole or they open with something about my Jeep. It gets the conversation started.

Ice666White · 2020-02-05T18:38:56+00:00

Well this post does not quite tackle the whole Tinder thing, but I am one of many others who have been using it quite effortlessly to get good frequent results. But you're certainly right about a few things. So if you're looking to improve Tinder, online dating and social media for real, instead of 'suicide swiping' which won't help or 'mass messaging', you could follow the Message Game principles and get a much higher success rate.

Tinder takes very little time, or should.

Title	[deleted by user]
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	33
Comments	26
Date	February 5, 2020 2:11 PM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/eza3vv/tinder_online_dating/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/deleted-by-user.1489987 https://theredarchive.com/post/1489987

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