So, I came to the realization that almost nobody wants to see you succeed with seduction. The only one you can depend 100% is yourself. Only you want you to actually succeed.

It's a bit ironic because society wants people who are good at flirting. Girls want men who can flirt them, your parents want you to get married to a high-quality woman, your friends want to see you bang hot girls and be happy. However, ALL these people want to see the outcome, but always cringe with the process.

Women absolutelly want charming men who are grounded, confident around women, who can banter and tease and make them laugh and wet at the same time. Close your eyes and imagine a very charming movie character. I am sure that you can do it within 5 seconds. I for example imagine Fassbender

What the society tragically fails to realize is that men do not suddently spring-up like that. There are very few "naturals", and even they have pleanty of cringy stories about themselves to tell. So practically, everyone goes through the "grinding" phase. Most people do in collage, but many men "bloom" later (and that's totally fine).

During that phase, they will do all sort of "un-calibareted" stuff. They will drunkenly hit on girls on the street, they will try to makeout with somebody who is totally not into them at the frat party, they will send cringy messages or send dick-picks, they will compromize in order to get into an OK relationship, and they they will cry and curse the "bad" women out there who cheated on them.

And all that are actually a learning experience, so another very important attribute of these people is that they learn from their mistakes, (self-)calibrate effectively and thus end up naturally charming and witty.

Seduction, in terms of theoretical knowledge and cold-approaching, is essentially a very effective tool to go through that grinding phase at any point of your life. However, practicing cold-approaching and hitting on every woman with 2 legs has been frowned upon. You should understand that people do frown upon that practice not because it's bad, but because it shakes their own world-view, and people have a naturall tendency to resist such changes. Plus, people sometimes have quite distored views on how some things work in dating (partly because of Hollywood)

Some examples of people who want you to fail:

  • Your family. Your dear mom and dad and your sister and brother would definatelly boast about their "womanizer" boy, but would definatelly scold you if they heard that you stop random women on the street to hit on them. They want a "good boy" after all who does not harasses people (failing to understand how this "good boy" attribute clushes with the "womanizer" label).

  • your friends. Your friends will most likely be in the men/girls categories below. But to add to that, people who go out regularly with you will "confront" you if you "change" in any way. If your friends are accustomed to the forever-alone Joe, they will try to keep it that way. Maybe they'll cheer you on your decision to change, but in the end, nobody will actively support you. Try asking one of your friends to wing you for example. They'll shame you. Moreover, if you go out with your friends and you start hitting on random girls, they'll most likely express their disapproval and/or say that you are embarrassing them

  • Other men who game. Sex is competition. The saying that 20% of men get the 80% of women is kinda true. It doesn't matter where you fall in that metric, but if you are out of the game, you are doing everyone else a favour. Let that sink in. Every time you go out, either you want it or not, you are competing with a lot more guys that you could imagine. The moment you give up or you fail, you are "freeing up" your spot in the competition. Even your wing thinks that.

  • Other men who don't game. There will be men who don't practice game and will either have better women or worse women than you. Doing game will prove both of those men that their world-view is wrong. And that's a really tough pill to shallow for anyone. Men who get better women tell themselves that they can do better because of looks, status, or money, but, God forbid, somebody without these stuff can get equally or better quality of women. Similarly, those who do worse will be proven that having sub-par (or no) girls is part due to their own slack, and not because they lack money/status/looks alone. Thus, almost every man will dismiss you and try to drag you down when you tell them that you go out to hit on girls so you can get better.

  • Girls. Every single girl I've known either explicitly or implicitly wants 2 things from her partner: 1) Be good with women 2) don't talk to other women. A perfect example is the common shit-test where they are having a good time, but stop and tell you "I don't like you. You look like a womanizer", or "You tell every girl this stuff?". Yes. Hello. I came here, made you have a good time, knew exactly how to tease you and your friend, and brought up some of those tingly feelings that you gonna remember tomorrow. Of course I've messed up and made a fool of myself another 999 times in the past. I didn't wake up one day and knew how to flirt. You are not the special snowflake, and neither am I. If girls actually wanted to help you get better at flirting, they wouldn't turn their back, dismiss you, yell at you, etc. when you approached them on the street. Intead, they should welcome cold-approaching, be nice and talk with you, and, best case scenario, give you feedback at the end. But who does that?

  • Modern society. Gillette add. What's more to say. There are even nation-wide campaigns against day-game now. Don't bother the girls on the street, or clubs or send hungry sexual messages on IG (despite of the fact that all the girl does is post her ass). Don't do any of these. That's harassment. But then again, please be charming and deep and a virgin and also good in bed.

Note: The only people who will probably want you to succeed are people who are getting something out from it. Your therapist or dating coaching, or professional photographer, and generally people that are getting paid, and they will have happy clients if their clients get the results they want (though, I'd still argue that some/most of these people can still feed on your insecurities)

So what do you guys think? Do people generally support you? Do you receive valuable feedback? Or you are almost always dismissed, calling you a "player" or the "lustful guy who hits on every girl he meets", trying to drag you down to their missery?