tldr: met girl at predrinks, talked to her for a while, she wasn't very receptive, turns out she had a boyfriend. met girls at dance floor, one had boyfriend, I fucked up with regards to the other.

Hey everyone! I personally believe that the most important part of the seddit community are "FR"s. This is because it showcases the daily lives of sedditors, we see the very successful ones, and the not so successful ones (like me). And this also shows the good, the bad, and the terrible things that happen on a night out, while also letting commenters share their insight.

 

Saturday night, there was an event "mock wedding". Exactly what it sounds like, a huge university event where there is a fake wedding. An excuse for people to party in suits and dresses. I dressed up in a suit and went to my friends place. He stays in an apartment meant for university students, his buzzer doesn't work so I just buzzed random people who live near him. On the second try someone replied and it was a girl saying "what?" and I replied "can you let us in? I'm going to my friends" and they buzzed us in. Over here there was 1 good friend, and 4 other people who I was acquainted with/friends with, but not too close. From here we all went to pre-drinks. At the pre-drinks there were about 30-40 people, I knew no one except for the people I got there with. Still very sober and not "in state" I was very quiet.

sidebar I'm fairly introverted, so I need to talk to people who make it obvious they want to talk to me before I get into state and start talking to people.

I stood around with my friends, watching them play beer pong and such, and just talked with the people I already knew. As my friends were playing beer pong against another team I commented on how bad my friends were at the game (they were doing terrible) "You suck 'friend_name'!" and then I looked at the other team and said, "you're destroying them". to which he just laughed and said you should play next! teach them how its done. The fact that this random guy replied with this and wanted to play me, assuming I'm good, helped me get into state, it just changed my mindset. I'm not a validation seeker, however I usually need an excuse to act. I had no real desire to play beer pong, and I was content with watching, however when this guy told me to play, I was like shit this could be fun! So i got into line to play beerpong.

 

My spot in the line was behind two girls. My friends lost against their opponents. The girls were up next against the opponents, the girls were destroying the opponents, and while that was happening I looked at them and said "you're really good!" to which they replied that they're not and they're just getting lucky. The opponents lost against the girls. It was my turn. The game started, and as we were playing I made little remarks based on what was happening on the game, over time one of the girls got distracted and started talking to one of her friends at which point me and her partner slowly started getting annoyed and shared a look like "come and do your turn!". We both stayed chill, and while she was talking to her friend I heard her say that she is in mumbled undergrad and wanting to get into law. I heard this and leaned over the table a bit and said "you want to get into law? Thats sick, law is really good!" and she was like "yeah it is!" I'm guessing she was a little taken aback as to why I would say that, she mightve been thinking "yeah its a great career path... like da fk". Anyways, the game ended with me winning and the girl who wanted to get into law walked by me and as she did I stopped her and asked what she was doing in undergrad and why she wanted to get into law. She said she was studying political studies, walked into the bathroom (which was right beside the beer pong table) door open and started doing her earrings or something. She asked what I'm doing and I said "Law." and introduced myself, and she introduced herself, and she was like "OH!!! Wait so do you know x" and I was like yeah, theyre in my class, and I feel like this is when it all clicked for her. At this point she was a lot more interested and we had a conversation about what kind of law she wants to study and stuff. While talking I was looking at her eyes but she would not make eye contact, so I just looked at her eyes pretty much and then over time looked away, at the scenery other people, etc, and then looked at her eyes again. question for the audience, why would she not make eye contact and what does it mean. We were standing up for the majority of this and so I asked her to sit down cuz I didn't enjoy standing, so we became a little more isolated and talked for a bit longer. I personally enjoyed the conversation, but over time I got bored, and felt like she wasn't really very attracted to me so I decided to bail. I later found out that she had a boyfriend so I feel like I made the right decision.

 

While I was talking to this girl, her beer pong partner came and said "good game" to me and I shook her hand, and said good game. I was in the middle of a good conversation with her friend at this point though and I didn't want to let that just end (this was close to the beginning of the conversation where she just got started as to why she wanted to get into law). After my long conversation with her friend I went and hung out with my friends at the beer pong table again, someone else took my spot since I was gone talking to the girl for so long. I got bored and I saw the friend again and so I went and talked to her, introduced myself, found out her name, and what she's studying etc. I couldn't talk to her for too long because they were about to leave for the event real soon. We all got up and left for Mock Wedding.

 

At the event I got there with my friends, and I'll just say this right now that I did not see either girls from the the predrinks over there, it was really packed. I went and chilled with the guys I went there with, and hung out. Got some drinks. While we were standing, since it was still fairly early in the night and no one was dancing we just talked with one another. As the night went by the dance floor slowly started getting crowded. I had to go to the bathroom though, so I started walking towards the bathroom line, it was a bunch of porta potties so there was just one big line. There was a group of girls at the end, and they were a little to the side of the line and I couldn't tell if they were actually in the line or not. So I walk up to them and I ask "are you guys in the line for the bathroom?". One cheeky girl replies "no we're just standing here for fun." obvious sarcasm. I reply "okay then can I cut infront of you?" walking ahead and she looks at me and says "no we're in line!" and at this point I just introduce myself and get their names. Turns out they live across from my friend's dorm and I've actually seen them before, haven't really talked to them though, and incidentally these were the same girls who let us in to the apartment! So I brought that up and we talked, until the line got to the front and they used the bathroom, I used the bathroom, and I didn't see them again for a while. Now I went to the dance floor, saw some old friends from highschool and talked to them, and danced with random girls, got rejected a couple times because the girls just didn't like me I guess, oh well I let that shit slide right off me like hoe you aint ruinin my mood! As I was dancing, I met up with the girls from the bathroom and one of them (the cuter one) was like "Hey! youre the bathroom guy!" And i said yeah! I forgot your name what was it again, she told me again and then I bring out my phone and opened the snapchat app and was like "here add yourself it'll help me remember" and boom! I got her snapchat (doesn't mean anything though). Her friend saw this and was like, hey you don't want my snapchat? So i got her snapchat too. (I thought of doing this after I got back from the bathroom and realized I forgot both their names and also the fact I didn't get anyones snapchat/contact info from the predrinks) I also told her (the cute one) a fake name for myself, because my name isn't the easiest to pronounce and when she added me on snap she was like "hey this isn't what you told me!" so I replied saying my full name is (my friends made a joke of a long ass name which is like 1 first name 7 middle names and a last name) and I said this super long name and said but I tell my friends to call me (the fake name). So we danced for a while, I got close, tried to do kino and she was (for lack of a better word) 'content' with it but wasn't very receptive, my good friend came and started dancing with us, and casually whispered to me that she had a boyfriend. well this sucks. just my luck! So I stayed dancing there, but it made sense now why she wasn't as receptive as I had hoped, so I started dancing with the friend, and here is where I truly believe I fucked up. When I was dancing with the friend I grabbed her hips and danced and got close, but she didn't seem too receptive either so eventually I just let it go and started dancing with the group again and eventually left.

Now the reason why I think I fucked up, and I realized this the next day when I was looking back on it, was because I didn't really wanna dance with her. I obviously wanted the friend more, and even when I was dancing with this girl I wasn't really into it. I was in my head a lot (I'm gonna blame it on the fact both of the previous girls I was talking to had boyfriends and ruined my headspace) but more than that I was dancing with her purely because I wanted validation. I was dancing with her because I wanted something to happen (outcome dependent, very bad). I believe the reason why she wasn't receptive is because she knew I wasn't into it, I was just doing the motions. So even though I said this girl wasn't receptive I believe that it was entirely my fault, and that she would've been more receptive if I didn't fuck up.

 

The event was playing country music and I don't enjoy country music, and its a real effort for me to dance and try to enjoy myself to music I don't like. I walked around and met a whole bunch of old friends from highschool and soccer that I hadn't seen in a while and it was lots of fun. I approached some girls on the dance floor and got rejected (by girls I didn't even find attractive no less) which just hurt my motivation to try. I know that rejection shouldn't phase us, and it doesn't in the long run. But in the moment when you get rejected by girls you're not even attracted to, it lowers your self-esteem and motivation, and I believe I could've kept going if I wasn't also disappointed that the two other girls were in relationships. I just went and sat down because I was tired from the night, like I said dancing and enjoying the music is tiring. I eventually left soon after I said hi to people.

 

All in all, I really enjoyed the night. The girl who I asked me to get her snapchat followed me on insta, and I followed her back. And then I sent a follow request to her (cute) friend who accepted and followed me back. I met lots of old friends I hadn't seen in a while, and had a great conversation with a cute girl at pre-drinks about law. Looking back at the night I don't think I made any big mistakes and I don't regret anything other than the one thing I already said I fucked up at, with regard to dancing with the friend and not actively wanting to. I believe if I was in the right headspace that could've led to something. The other girls being in relationships was just unlucky for me, and I realize that and I was over it when I thought it through rationally the next day. I would love for any and all comments.

The only real question I have is, what does it mean if a girl won't look you in the eyes, and what should you do?