Alright, here we go Seddit. The following is nothing too glorious but I want to:

  • set a benchmark for myself that I can revisit in the future (hopefully seeing improvement), and...

  • get some feedback on this shit.

CONTEXT

Got introduced to a girl through a friend at a bar a few weeks ago. Was definitely not in state but ended up #closing anyways. Girl's a poetry major, HB7, seems reasonably intelligent so I'm into it. Got her number and ejected (had better things to do that night). Was the DD so drove my boys home and that was that.

Definitely thought I built up a reasonable level of attraction in the initial interaction (which was the first thing I think I've actually done right). A few day later when talking to the friend who had originally introduced us I got "She's just really sick of meeting guys who just want to get in her pants."

Well despite what this girl apparently wants, I texted her asking if she wanted to hang out (while not sending any other texts as per common seddit advice) and she said yes immediately.

THE DATE

Cut to the actual date. Asked her to meet (via text message) at a local hangout: drive-in ice cream spot right next to an old bridge. Pretty solid date spot because ice-cream, bridges, and a park nearby. Great weather for it, easy choice.

Dates supposed to start at "7ish".

6:45 Sitting at home working on a paper (Currently a university student.) Don't plan on leaving til about 7, it's a 10 minute drive. at this point get a text saying

I might be slightly late cause I'm walking over.

Get what that means. Don't reply, don't leave til 7:15.

7:20 Get another text

K I'm here. If your there then u can cross the bridge and walk left.

I arrive, check my phone and send her

Haha you afraid of bridges?

We meet at the middle of the bridge.

I immediately go for the hug (because it's a date and that's what is usually done), which she promptly DENIES but sort of sliding to the side of it incredibly awkwardly.

"Sorry, I don't hug guys I've only met once." Wowza, the bitch shield is up. Not an issue.

I reply, "Wow, Late, likes to meet at bridges, and afraid of human contact: Pretty sure that makes you a sociopath."

She laughs, "I think your the 3rd person to tell me that in my life"

At this point we are walking back towards where I came, to the ice-cream shack. I am making a concentrated effort to keep strong eye-contact, stand up straight, and fully engage her with body language, opening up to her, using hand gestures.

"That's it? Well maybe you still have a chance to recover then."

My biggest regret is at this point I didn't try to break the touch barrier, but I was sorta feeling like a pussy after getting denied a hug.

For me breaking the initial touch barrier is probably the most difficult thing to do without it feeling awkward. I am making a concentrated effort to improve it. If you have tips on how they are much Appreciated.

So we continue and go get ice cream. We each buy our own, first because I am legitimately poor right now (thanks university) and second I'm still not sold on this financially the man is responsible thing. Feel free to disagree.

At this point we walk back over the bridge, talking. I'm maintaining strong body language and eye-contact. She is visibly opening up.

I see a kid shooting hoops on a net he has set up along the street and I grab her hand and change directions so we start walking towards him

I decide to work on push-pull, saying something teasing and moving in closer to her, then as she responds immediately changing and separating to go do something more interesting.

"What are we doing?"

"Come on we're gonna go shoot hoops with this kid"

"What? I don't play sports"

"Okay, then you can sit over there while I shoot hoops with this kid" cue smirk.

This works beautifully. All of the sudden she is needy for attention. It's obvious she can't believe that I would rather be throwing a leather ball in a hoop then worshiping her every step. We reach the kid, I ask him if I can take a shot. He passes me the ball and I sink it and walk away.

At this point she is fully opened up (although now awkwardly avoiding body contact, as in there SHOULD be contact but she is too afraid to initiate it).

We continue walking and at some point I decided:

Wow, this girl is boring. I am initiating all of the interesting interactions, she is visibly needy. I think this date is over

THIS IS A BIG DEAL FOR ME. I have previously gone through my life qualifying myself to girls, and for the first time, in a real-life situation I honestly felt like I was the one in full control.

Eventually we make our way back to my car, it's fairly cold so I offer her a ride home out of courtesy and she (probably hoping to get dick) graciously accepts.

We reach her place and I don't even feel like going for the K-close. She exhibits all of the traits that I would have 6-months ago, and it's an immediate turn-off. "bye" she gets out of the car and I drive home.

No Fucking, No Kiss, nothing. But I still feel like it was the most successful date I have been on in a long time. I know I still have a LONG ways to go in this whole seduction thing, but seeing a mirror of my old self in another person made me realize just how unattractive I was. Glad to be on the road to improvement.