Took out this super cute girl from the gym. Our initial plan was to go get dinner and listen to a live band. When I went to pick her up, I asked her (i.e. Told her in the form of a question) that we should swing by the football field. They were doing a fundraiser raffle for a local girl who needs joint replacement surgery. I've known her dad for a while and he's a pro cage fighter. This was a deliberate move to 1) begin breaking plans to show spontaneity, 2) that I'm charitable [this little girl, and her whole family really are sweethearts. I love em], 3) that I am into, and good at, fighting [I coach the wrestling class at the local MMA gym], and 4) I've got friends whom I share a great deal of mutual respect with.

So out at dinner we were seated against the wall and I didn't like the table. It was a little too big to casually touch hands or anything. At one point I was drawing her a picture on a napkin and asked her to come around to the side to see better, but she declined. I'm thinking I should have just moved myself over instead of asking, but it would have been nice to get her to do it. Oh well. I'd also note that next time I go to this place to ask for a center table instead of a wall table as they are smaller.

One thing she said she is very proud of is that she is a polyglot (I.e. Speaks multiple languages). She told me I could ask her to translate anything into Swahili [seriously!] so I started with "Good evening. How are You?". She said that was too boring, something more difficult, so I went with "I don't kiss on a first date." She started, but actually struggled to find the word. So I blurted out "if that's too hard, how about 'I don't fuck on the first date'". She kinda laughed, but was still searching for the word.

We went back to my place for a cup of tea and on the drive I mentioned that I have this fear of fear, so I have a policy with myself: if I feel nervousness/anxiety over something that is not more than a 3 or 4 out of 10 on a scale of irreversible damage, I HAVE to do it.

Later that night, before I brought her home we stopped and looked at the moon and clouds, so I put my hand on her back and kissed her. It wasn't bad, but I think she was mixed about it. She brought up that I said "I didn't kiss on the first date", but playfully clarified that I didn't SAY it, I ASKED how to say it. I went in for a second kiss and got a little body and tongue this time.

So when I drop her off she said 1) she does want to see me again, 2) wants us to be discreet at the gym because she HATES gossip [Fine by me. Same here], but 3) goes for a hug and gives me a cheek kiss.

I'm thinking that next time it would be better to only stick with light, innocent touching instead of going for a kiss again. I can chalk our first one up to my need to do things "less than a 4". Plus, I'd like it more if she were more into it.

I'm going to have to think up some way to follow up with her, as the physical touch de-escalated at the end, and I'm not too thrilled about it. I think if we have a more active, workout-like date next time would be a good idea. Getting the blood/sweat pumping is a good bonding thing.

That's my story. Any critique would be very much appreciated.