Background: I started my PUA journey about 5 months ago. I used to be extremely shy, had crippling approach anxiety, and couldn't think of things to say. For those struggling with pickup, I'VE BEEN THERE!

TL;DR

1. Outcome independence. Go out and enjoy yourself. Do stuff YOU like to do.

2. OBSERVATION is your friend for conversations and opening. What are they wearing? What are they doing? What's going on around you?

The purpose of this field report is to highlight 3 things I've working on: outcome independence, observation, and conversation.

Outcome Independence: I set out last night to see 2 of my favorite DJs in the city. I had a great day at work, and was feeling exceedingly happy. I told myself, "Tonight, I'm having fun. I don't really care about phone numbers, making out, or sex. All I want to achieve tonight is to see a show I really want to see, and to dance my face off." This helped me tremendously in getting into the right mindset for the night. The night started with a train ride into the city. A girl sat next to me.

Observations: I noticed she had a lip piercing, a gauge in her ear, a cool bracelet, a football team beanie, sweet basketball shoes, a tattoo on her hand and one on her wrist, an iPhone case with marijuana leaves on it, and a box of chocolates in the shape of Spiderman.

I opened by asking her if the lip piercing hurt. As she was talking, I mentally noted all the above things, and used them as conversation cues. She wasn't my type, but I was genuinely curious about her piercings and tattoos, because I want to get them myself.

In the city, I noticed that a many people were carrying pillows. I was running late, so I didn't have time to stop sets in the street to ask about the pillows (easy opener).

I taxied to the venue. I went into the bar next door for a few drinks while waiting for my friend. I saw two HB8s sitting at the end of the bar. I squeeze in next to one of them, put my hand on her shoulder, and asked "May I get in here to get a drink?".

Observations: I noticed that there was a special drink menu for Valentine's Day at the bar. I saw that the girls weren't dressed for the occasion (the party was summer themed). Their drinks looked particularly girly. One girl already finished her drink, while her friend's was almost full. One girl had matching earrings and necklace. One had a great smile.

I opened with, "Have you had anything from this menu? I don't want anything girly. Your drinks look super girly." They got defensive about their drinks (perfect). I asked if they were going to the event next door (yes). I teased them for not dressing for the party. I left the set (needed to pee after the long train & taxi ride), and told them I'd see them later.

After the bathroom, I sat down at the other end of the bar, and another HB8 comes up next to me to order a drink. I opened by asking her if she was going to the party next door. I noticed immediately that she had an accent, so I asked her where she was from (Paris... how sexy). I told her that I've never been to Paris, and that she should tell me what I should do in Paris. I touched her shoulder and arm when talking. I leaned in close and talked softly into her ear. After about 10 minutes, she had to go back to her group of friends. I didn't close on her number here, and that was a mistake.

My friend finally shows up and we go to the venue. I spend the night drinking, dancing, and enjoying the music. I had the biggest grin on my face the entire night because I really wanted to see the DJs spin. In the venue, I was more concerned about my personal enjoyment, and less so about pick up. The night gets a little hazy due to alcohol, but regardless I HAD A LOT OF FUN. That's all that really matters!