How did you take the first step from reading about pickup, to actively approaching girls when out?

eviiil · 2015-12-30T16:53:03+00:00

I took a bus to the nearest shopping mall, to do my first cold approach. Was so scared I just nervously ate food and browsed my phone for a couple hours and made zero approaches. I repeated this 6 times over the next two weeks.

Then I decided that I would try some sort of social ladder to alleviate my anxiety. Mess around with girls working in stores, without the purpose of hitting on them. There were a couple really awkward instances of this. However my the third or fourth time trying it, the laughter from the girls became more genuine, and the overall experience just became more enjoyable. No numbers collected yet, but there were some realizations I made during this, the most important one being: I love talking to and meeting women.

And that's what tipped things in my favor. I realized that a fun interaction is far more good than an awkward one is bad. That you have a lot more to gain than to lose. And so about a month after I first went out to cold approach, I did it. She had a very punk rock, "hottopicore" type look. And she smiled in laughed, said I was sweet but she had a boyfriend. I knew damn well she didn't, but I wasn't mad whatsoever. I knew it was on me, and that my nerves were preventing me from showing my true self. I knew rejection wasn't personal.

...

Commit to looking to yourself and never blaming women for your issues.
Realize that in the beginning, girl's aren't really rejecting you...but a less masculine, uncool parody of you that anxiety forces you to push out.
Focus on body language to start, notice any difference in if and how women look at you when you carry yourself differently.
Your physique is not where most of your value lies to a woman... but lift like it is.
It's ok to be nervous. It's far from optimal, but it's workable.
If you find yourself too anxious to approach, small talk and joke with the bartender, or girls working in stores.
Commit to doing your first approach today or tonight. No goal to close, just to open.

mmmzesty · 2015-12-30T17:55:55+00:00

Know that rejection cannot be personal because the person doesn't even know you.

Start small if you have to. My first real approach was indirect to a girl who worked in a clothing store. She ended up being 16 and it got awkward really fast, and in the moment you hate the awkwardness but you'll laugh about it after you leave and realize that it actually means nothing.

Go indirect for starters, that was my move. Gauge her personality, does she seem introverted? Is she more outgoing and fun? Listen to the tone of her voice and see her facial expressions and gauge how aggressive you should be when you go direct. Say something like "I actually don't care where Starbucks is, I just thought you were cute and wanted to say hi. My name's suckurmum."

That's it. She might laugh and shake your hand and tell you her name, in which case you just carry on a few minute conversation and ask for the number.

This entire thing is a numbers game. A lot of girls are going to reject you, and it'll probably be more than the ones who don't but as long as you keep approaching then it's not a big goal to get 5 numbers per day, and even if you only get 1 you'll notice that all the girls that rejected you 2 hours ago are completely off your mind, and the only thing on your mind will be the success you had that day.

FortitudeCreed · 2015-12-30T17:05:53+00:00

Go to places in your neighborhood where there are alot of people. Where i live there are a shit ton of malls, i have access yo beaches etc. The best way to start is to go out and whoever you see, just give them a compliment and keep walking. Like "nice shoes" "nice hat" etc.

The_Fallen_Knight · 2015-12-30T19:19:52+00:00

I went to the beach and talked to some guy first to get into social mood. Then I approached a Dutch milf resting on the beach asking her if she had a cell phone because I need to call my friend. I was hesitate, took much longer than 3 seconds to decide but she smiled at me, so I did it. Unfortunately, when I asked her if she's alone in Bali, she said that she's with her husband. So I barely showed any sexual interest to her but that was my first cold approach to a female.

throwawayafterdone · 2015-12-30T20:10:15+00:00

Got a friend and we went out at night.

Title	How did you take the first step from reading about pickup, to actively approaching girls when out?
Author	suckurmum
Upvotes	5
Comments	8
Date	December 30, 2015 4:07 PM UTC (10 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/3yso4z/how_did_you_take_the_first_step_from_reading/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/how-did-you-take-the-first-step-from-reading-about.1399889 https://theredarchive.com/post/1399889

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