How do I improve?

callmeslate · 2015-09-27T23:24:37+00:00

Ok, you're going about this all wrong. The fact that you lead in here with your squash and school is already a bad sign. Let's start with your athletics, and I will get to you being "smart" in a minute. I'm in decent shape, workout 5 days a week don't eat garbage etc. I've always managed to get attractive women, believe me or don't I don't really care. Point is, as I've been with women who I have always considered to be, "out of my league" so to speak, I've asked women about this before, most all women I've asked have said that they don't place to much importance on physique. Now maybe that's just the women I have dated but I doubt it. Next, you said you were smart, and take all AP classes. This may be true but there is a huge difference between being smart and being interesting. . I consider myself to be both, I have two graduate degrees and I read a fair bit, but I know that I'm not likely to seduce a woman by discussing the books on my nightstand. Nor is it probable that a woman wants to hear about how Alexander Hamilton fought relentlessly for a central bank, and believed that national debt was a good thing. Find people who are into what you are into. Ask a chick about a piece of jewelry she is wearing, what her favorite restaurant is, favorite movie. The restaurant and movie are perhaps lame but definitely workable segues to asking someone out on a date. If you are a shy dude the trick is to ask questions, get a girl talking, if you are talkative like I am, sometimes it is knowing when to shut up. Also I try to minimize talking about my accomplishments. But what do I know?

SinSlayer · 2015-09-27T23:36:45+00:00

Okay, there are a few suggestions I have for you to start moving in the direction of your goals:

I want more friends

Be careful with this one. More friends isn't always a good thing. Try aiming for a strong circle of close friends. While there's nothing wrong with increasing your social circle, FRIENDS are people you can count on in the most dire of situations. Like, 4am, "I need you to help me bury a body" people.

In any event, networking is a good way to increase your social circle and standing. Get contact info from everyone you vibe with. Phone, email, facebook, instagram, what ever, and keep in touch with them regularly. This keeps you on their mind and will often times lead to them keeping you "in the loop" when it comes to social events. And really take time to learn about them and whats going on in their life. There's a saying: "You'll get more friends by learning about their lives, then by trying to drag them into yours."

Closer Relationships

I'm assuming you mean people you can be intimate with (not physically, but mentally and emotionally). This takes time. As you expand your social circle, you'll find people you gravitate to naturally, who share common interest, and who have similar values. Spend time with these people. Invite them over for dinner, or just to hang out. Spend time with them. This will build memories and generate bonds. Over time, those bonds strengthen and before you know, you have someone close to you who knows you better than you know yourself.

A girlfriend

This is actually the easy one. Based on what you've said about yourself, and depending on what you look like, you sound like quite a catch. Women naturally gravitate towards successful, charming, attractive men. All you have to do open the door for them to come into your world. Approach and interact with women you find attractive. Learn to escalate and generate attraction. A #-close should lead to a date should lead to more dates, should lead to physical intimacy, rinse, repeat, until you agree to be exclusive, and viola, you're in a relationship. You just need to get out there and start meeting women. Assuming you're an attractive guy, you shouldn't have too much trouble.

Hope this helps. Let me know if you have any other questions.

ThatSpecialPlace · 2015-09-28T02:03:11+00:00

It sounds like you're trying a little too hard.

I think you should just relax a bit and have some fun. It sounds like you have a bunch of things to make for a good conversation, but how's your energy? If you want to be the life of the party and be the guy everyone loves, you have to completely cool with being your own man. It sounds stupid, but you need to love yourself.

Title	How do I improve?
Author	throwawaypokerplayer
Upvotes	0
Comments	8
Date	September 27, 2015 9:16 PM UTC (10 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/3mmco2/how_do_i_improve/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/how-do-i-improve.1394968 https://theredarchive.com/post/1394968

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