How long do I spend with her?

alonzoftw · 2017-09-17T14:02:04+00:00

Since the time of the events will vary you have to distinguish what the 'prime time' if you will, is. There are three parts to it:

All this is an example, you need to adjust to what YOU know.

The first part let's say is 3 hours. NOTHING is going to happen. She just got there and although it was nice meeting you, you are an obstacle in her having a good time. She's going to want to mingle and see whats going on. Don't even ask for her number.

The second part let's say is another 3 hours. This is optimal time. She's already felt the party, if her goal is sex or physical intimacy, now is the time she is looking for it. This is the time to make moves. Before this time is up you ideally want to know who you're taking home and stick to it.

Third part is basically outside the venue or event. Let's say it consists of 10 to 20 mins tops. If you're still not with someone, now's the time to figure your shit out or go home and masturbate.

I know you're focused on one girl but your goal should be to mingle as well with everyone, you never know when you might find yourself intrigued by someone else!

When it comes to time, there is no difference from let's say a club and a wedding.

CibrecaNA · 2017-09-17T16:21:19+00:00

All the time. You problem is you think that if you meet a woman, get her number, then leave, you made a great impression. That's a horrible impression. You basically said, "Here's what a date is like . . . I'll meet you somewhere and provide no entertainment but expect you to entertain yourself and then I'll swing around later like I own you." That's ridiculous.

You meet her and you show her a good time. With different suggestions on how to make the event better. It could even just be you joking. And if she wants to mingle (or if you want to mingle) then mingle together. Essentially you're saying, "Hi, I'm a stranger, but go out and meet other strangers." Come on.

I get why you think this--'cause I used to think this too--but come on. Spend time with her (whether in club or wedding) and show her a good time and suggest better, and better times. Culminating in the bedroom if you have the balls.

FALLENV3GAS · 2017-09-17T13:55:26+00:00

Spend as much time as you want. She might just want to talk to you or mingle with others. Play it by ear.

Jacob_961 · 2017-09-17T15:47:02+00:00

Wedding you keep her next to you basically forever until you're both a bubble and the wedding doesn't matter. You're 21 y/o chances are you don't really care about the wedding anyway.

DavidGolani11 · 2017-09-17T15:40:34+00:00

Spend as much time as you feel you need to.

sergeant_flem · 2017-09-18T03:15:12+00:00

how much time do you spend with her

As little or as much time as you feel you can to both your mutual comfort. There's no hard-fast answer here. If she doesn't seem comfortable with you at all then don't waste your time with her, but if she seems to enjoy your presence then by all means stick around for a while.

After approaching and making you interest clear, do you hang around and keep talking and trying to escalate or is it better to circulate and mingle with other people, then return to her later

Again, depends on how she reacts to you initially, but the whole point of a social event is to mix and mingle with everybody regardless, so definitely be social! Meet new people, and you might even meet another girl! Or if you two are feeling each other enough that you're stuck in conversation encourage her to socialize as well "Hey, this is a party! Let's stop being antisocial and go mingle, these people seem cool lets say hi!" Make it an activity for the both of you.

Events like these last for hours so you wouldn't want to seem clingy or desperate, but then again you don't want her to be approached by someone else or her forgetting you

You're getting too invested in her already, despite the fact you two just met. It really shouldn't matter who approaches her or if she forgets you or not. Chances are other guys will approach her, and if she runs off with another guy and forgets you then it wasn't meant to be. Zero expectations my friend.

Also how do you think this differs in a club like setting?

In a club it'll be hard to make conversation with a girl because of all the loud music. Chances are you'll both start dancing together then go from there. In clubs it tends to be less about the conversation and more about physical attraction/connection in the heat of the moment.

IIHotelYorba · 2017-09-17T16:06:21+00:00

Try to pull as a fast as possible, as in immediately. Most girls won't go with you that fast but the point is to learn when she is ready by feeling it out and not being afraid to take the risk and try "too soon." If she says no just act like it doesn't matter to you at all and try again later.

Most puas will tell you it will take 1 1/2 to 3 hours, so strap in and enjoy each other's company, etc. This is generally true, but the girl is ready when she's ready, you WON'T know when this in until you try, and you can absolutely miss out just because she was ready an hour ago and now she's tired/hungry/has to get on a plane -but you were too scared to ask her then, or the PUA manual says "3 hours" etc etc etc. Longer is generally safer but you never know how long you will have with a girl so make it count by learning through trial and error in your approaches to be as fast as you NEED to be.

Start thinking of fun things you'd like to do outside of the event you two are at. Things you can pull her to. In conversation talk to her about these things and then just try to get her to come with you and do that. The closer it is to where you are, the more excited she is to do it, and the longer you have spent together, (the more rapport you generated together) the more high percentage it is.

And remember, it doesn't have to be all the way back to your/her place. It just needs to be where people can't really see you. Hit your friend's room, a bathroom, your car, some bushes, I'm not even joking. These places are gold when you haven't known a girl that long- she's seriously less scared of fucking a guy in the bushes nearby than going across town to his place. Distance is a weird and spooky thing with girls.

Title	How long do I spend with her?
Author	ThanoHD
Upvotes	33
Comments	9
Date	September 17, 2017 12:10 PM UTC (8 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/70n4wt/how_long_do_i_spend_with_her/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/how-long-do-i-spend-with-her.1433822 https://theredarchive.com/post/1433822

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