How long does it take to start having fun talking to strangers?

ShirosaNeko · 2014-12-13T23:49:38+00:00

I get your feels, it's nothing new to me. I must admit that I'm probably in the same "phase", but the difference is that I don't care at all. I just keep saying to myself, do it, go there, talk to that pretty woman. And if it doesn't work out, then I'm going back to my friends or just walking around finding another interesting group or single person. The most important thing is that you really get into that mood that everything is okay as it is.

It's completely okay to not be instantly on that level you want to be! Just have fun!

One thing I learned is that if you're bored then you're not doing it right. I was bored today when I danced around a bit with two friends, but i was not in the mood for dancing, even though I liked the music. I just wanted to meet new people, so I excused myself and talked to some girls, and boy... I got some pretty damn mean rejections, but I also got one girl who had the fun of her life with me and I got her number. And even the rejections were fun, because sometimes it's just hilarious how women react ;D

smegma_enthusiast · 2014-12-14T04:56:43+00:00

Agreeing with those other guys and the stuff they said.

What type of interaction would amuse you? The idea behind a line like "I'm an undercover agent" is that it's amusing, but maybe you find a different type of humor or conversation more enjoyable. Find out what entertains you, and do that. It's like having a strong frame, if you go up to a stranger, and just say what ever makes you laugh, then say it. It's very attractive, and almost challenging to be so self amused amongst people you don't know. I think the best thing you can do is identify what would entertain you most, and do that. Bring them into your world, if you get what I am saying.

You are beating a dead horse if you are disheartened by cheesy lines and everyone can see it in your eyes. Is beating a dead horse the right terminology?

dirk_e_diggler · 2014-12-14T02:31:16+00:00

Just to add to /u/ShirosaNeko's answer, it sounds like you're putting to much emphasis on pickup routines. The routines are there to give you something fun/witty to say when you're drawing a blank. Ideally, you wouldn't need them. If you quickly find a connection with the girl, you won't need them at all, because you'll become enraptured talking to each other about things you're both interested in. However, that's the best case scenario. The important thing is that you keep the interaction alive, and have fun with it. If you feel awkward using a particular routine, then don't use it (at least until you've practiced it to death, and it doesn't feel awkward anymore).

If your heart doesn't feel into it, then it may just be that you're not attracted to the girl, or you're not in a place where you're ready to meet new people. Both are necessary for pickup. However, another possibility is that you're feeling anxious, and you're interpreting it as disinterest. This is what's known as the apathy buffer. You feel anxious, but instead of facing the fear, you tell yourself you're not interested. Moving past that point requires introspection and courage.

Title	How long does it take to start having fun talking to strangers?
Author	blowhouse
Upvotes	5
Comments	4
Date	December 13, 2014 9:37 PM UTC (11 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/2p7dvg/how_long_does_it_take_to_start_having_fun_talking/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/how-long-does-it-take-to-start-having-fun-talking.1307107 https://theredarchive.com/post/1307107

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