How to stop being a simp/nice guy?

danksteamymemes · 2020-03-12T22:35:50+00:00

Read "Models" by Mark Manson. I can't say that book will definitely get you laid, but in the chapter "Emotional Neediness", he goes into the fact that you have to be less invested than the female in order to attract her. This was a heart breaking realization for me. I can't describe it very well, but I literally saw my entire life of trying to please women. The ones who fell head over heels for me are ones I didn't give two shits about. The ones I loved dearly and cared for did not love me. It all made so much sense. It's not that the chapter in that book tell you something that is fake. EVERY SINGLE MAN I have talked to has experienced this. That is how I quit being Mr. Nice. I had to realize that true love doesnt exist the way we think it does.

Please read the chapter "Emotional Neediness" in the book "Models: How to attract women through honesty" and send me a PM on your view.

quinnmcd · 2020-03-13T02:38:56+00:00

The Book No More Mr. Nice by Dr. Robert Glover changed my life last year. It went in-depth on why we are "nice guys" and gave exercises to break bad habits. It did a great job exposing the flawed mindset that "nice guys' have. These are the most important things I think "nice guys" need to learn:

1) self-love. If you only read one thing I hope you read this. Self-love is the most important thing you can learn. If it sets off a chain reaction to leads to becoming a better person and living a better life. When you learn to love yourself you stop looking for validation from others. You stopped caring if everyone likes you or not. All the matters at the end of the day that you know you're great. when you love yourself you don't seek people to complete you.

2) you can't be scared of confrontation or conflict. You have to learn to take risks and speak your mind. Don't let people disrespect or they will keep doing until they push you to your limit. Stand up for yourself and let people know what you will and what you won't tolerate. With women, you have to take risks. You have to say things out of your comfort zone to get sexual. You can't be scared of rejection. You shouldn't be happy to just be on the date with her you need to take risks (hold hand, kiss, etc.)

3) Entitlement. Nice guys have a false sense of reality. They think just because they do something nice for someone then they will get something in return. They are guys that think since they buy a drink for a girl she owes them her time. They think since they paid for dinner they deserve sex. they think just because they are nice every one should be nice to them and that's just not how the world works. No owes you anything even if you are nice to them.

I honestly could go one for days about what it takes to stop being a nice guy, but it's time for me to get off my soapbox. My main point is to stop being a "nice guy" you have to look at yourself and understand that what you're doing now isn't working. It takes time to break lifelong tendencies. You set your boundaries and start pushing the boundaries in other places. You have to learn how to be confident and assertive. Read the book I highly recommend if you're serious about change.

WhiteningMcClean · 2020-03-12T23:41:37+00:00

If you're trying to avoid simpishness but still want to be kind, don't let her bait you into a compliment. Instead, just imply that it's dumb to worry about things like that and that self-consciousness is more of a turn off than almost any physical feature. Be vague. You don't want her to get the impression that you either agree or disagree with her.

Or just don't say anything. A long time ago I made a rule not to compliment women except under three conditions: I've already slept with her, I have no intention of sleeping with her, or I'm praising an accomplishment of hers rather than a feature.

blood_clot_bob · 2020-03-13T00:25:53+00:00

Stop jerking off .

smoothmax · 2020-03-12T23:45:53+00:00

As a break from getting all chatty about how great she is, try smiling at her and say nothing, but think to yourself (as if you said it aloud) "Waddya talking about you're beautiful!" Or even, "Huh. I'd fuck you."

You could try tilting your head to one side in a friendly, quizzical way. And/or just do a half-smile or smirk.

Most important thing about dealing with people's negative emotions and comments is, NEVER mirror their emotional state. If their complaint is unreasonable, never agree OR argue with it. Someone down-mouthing themself is like a troll fishing for attention. Don't feed the troll by giving them serious feedback.

Nine_Faces · 2020-03-13T04:20:30+00:00

You get better.

Don’t let any woman tell you what you’re worth, you’re putting them on a pedestal because in your head you’re not enough, make yourself enough by creating a good life you enjoy, so the next time you talk to a woman you ask yourself “is she worth it?”

Workout and get in shape so having sex with you is every girls dream, get better financially, get close with your friends, go out, get drunk, have fun, get some hobbies, just have a full life any girl would want to be a part of.

bemore_ · 2020-03-13T11:31:51+00:00

It's a tricky one cos you'd basically be saying the same things in any situation, the place you're coming from is different though

You're saying those things to get her to like you not to genuinely build self esteem. So honesty is key here, you don't have to do shit if you don't wanna.. "I'm so insecure".. "oh ok".

Or just keep it simple, "you're being hard on yourself"

Just gotta be honest with yourself

DiligentNeat3 · 2020-03-13T16:53:24+00:00

"I'm not your psychiatrist :)"

Don't forget to smile cheekily when you say that.

kupsofjoe · 2020-03-17T08:48:13+00:00

These women are just using you for validation. Stop kissing ass. Try using something sarcastic instead.

Title	How to stop being a simp/nice guy?
Author	WesternIce0
Upvotes	16
Comments	15
Date	March 12, 2020 10:02 PM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/fhojc8/how_to_stop_being_a_simpnice_guy/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/how-to-stop-being-a-simpnice-guy.1492312 https://theredarchive.com/post/1492312

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