I decided to change.. 3 years later I fell much better, move on from my depression, changed country, all new life, and decided that now more than ever was time to start... but felt I always felt a little "old" for that kind of thing.. I'm 41.

After I put out a post , and received many advises, .. I decided myself that "yes I am still on time" I started to make small steps of even more self improvement. I started to "flirt" on my job - a comfort zone, carry a better smile, socialize more ... After I did a small approach again in my job, and after a crazy night with drinks (with some alcoholic approaches) I said to myself that I needed to put a different kind of test - day time, no job, no clubs, no bars, no drinks.

It was on Starbucks inside a shopping mall, packed with people. She was gorgeous.. Beautiful long blonde hair, a cute white smile - that makes small holes on her cheeks - brownish skin... like a way out of my league type. A very solid 9. She was with another friend in one of the center tables. All the man in the coffee shop were probably looking at her.. like me. I thought to myself "Shes attractive. I need to do it. If i go pass by her away I will regret." "Its not about her - its all about you! This is for you" "dont be selfish".

I took the center stage .. I was shaking like a leaf on a tree. My heart was pumping like I've just finished a long run. My legs vanished. "Excuse me. Whats your name?" "Camilla" "My name is John, just want to say that you have a beautiful hair.. and you are very pretty" She gave a beautiful smile and thank me. Minutes after my heart was still pumping like crazy .. and my legs were dizzy.

I left for work. I didn't want nothing with her. Just wanna surpassed a mind obstacle. I felt very happy and proud afterwards... I gave her a compliment.. her day just got better .. mine as well.

After that .. feeling more calm, I thought "all those girls there including her friend, were very jealous of her... and probably all the man were very jealous of me."

I did another approach on the subway since then. It was funny.. but I got rejection.. but damn I Loved it.

Now I feel anxious to do it again. My life needs some spice.