I'm so frustrated..

Feral_Garbage_Boy · 2019-05-23T13:07:21+00:00

Then make rejection the goal. See if you can get rejected 10 times in one night. Seriously, and have fun with it when you do it, too. Getting rejected is something you need to accept if you are ever going to move forward with this.

If your goal is to get rejected it will help you relax. You won't be as nervous, and it might backfire on ya! Cold approaching is scary as hell, but gets easier with practice. Another method is to forget about getting the girl or getting rejected and just make the goal to have a 3 minute conversation with a woman.

TaeKwonPiccolo · 2019-05-23T12:53:05+00:00

If you want to escalate physically you must first create sexual tension. There are entire youtube videos on the subject. I recommend the channel called Fearless Man.

Touching is something that must escalate slowly. Start with the hands, then wrist... and as she gets more comfortable lower back. Then go for a hug... Depending on the situation you may get to kiss her.

DDutch96 · 2019-05-23T10:45:10+00:00

I'm also like this. Start with light touches or casual wrap arounds the back doesn't have to be a jump right in.

caesarfecit · 2019-05-23T16:11:58+00:00

I can tell you what you're missing.

You're getting trapped in your own head because you're scared of girls not liking you. Ever considered that you're not gonna like every girl?

You learn this once you find yourself turning down sex. Doesn't happen often but it will. Then you'll know how it feels when the shoe is on the other foot. Once you find yourself in the position of having to reject otherwise attractive girls because of incompatibility or lack of chemistry, you stop getting so afraid of rejection. If anything you start to see it as a good thing. If she rejects you, it's actually a win-win as it means you won't waste anymore time, and you don't have to deal with her hurt feelings. The only people who take rejection worse than guys, are girls. You fear it, she's still haunted by that guy from junior high who shot her down because he was still in the "girls have cooties" phase.

Next, when it comes to sexual escalation, the way to get your mindset in the right place is to start viewing your sexuality as a reward, not a demand. Why? Because that's what people with self-esteem and standards do, and because that's how girls who actually like you will view you.

You put that mindset into action by flirting with her. You tease her, qualify her, make her chase a little, but always with a smile on your face to show that you're just playing around. A girl needs to feel the pull this generates to feel comfortable being attracted and aroused. You do this right and she'll give you approach signals and reciprocate your advances. Then escalation stops becoming so scary because you know from her actions that she wants it too.

And if she doesn't play along, she's either not interested, frigid, or terminally awkward and you know not to bother.

WhatsReddit123456 · 2019-05-23T19:48:49+00:00

Are you talking about escalating physically when approaching them for the first time? Cuz you definitely don't need to do that to get their number. If you're talking about actual dates, you don't have to do any physical escalation until like the 3rd date. Just be interesting and make them laugh. Once you feel that they are comfortable with you, you can finally tap them on the arm.

Title	I'm so frustrated..
Author	ozmflb
Upvotes	11
Comments	18
Date	May 23, 2019 9:19 AM UTC (7 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/bs0qhn/im_so_frustrated/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/im-so-frustrated.1469531 https://theredarchive.com/post/1469531

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