Approach Anxiety Tip [some examples]

If you are like me (100% introverted) and have some social anxiety (I was diagnosed as having a social phobia)...this may work for you.

 

  1. Get a group of friends (or a friend), people who you feel CONFIDENT around [and yes you can chose who you go around with based on if they are shittier than you in anyway (I don't mean bad people I mean people who have approach anxiety, aren't confident in their looks, etc.), people who you lead].

  2. Tell them (BRAG) that it is no big deal going to talk to women.
    [they will respond with something like you are full of shit, no one can do that...aka why they are out with you]

  3. Tell them that you will prove it and make them select the hottest girl or girls they see [one who isn't obviously engaged in a large group or in a meeting or whatever]

  4. Go up to said girl(s), and say something like "I just wanted to let you know that XYZ" [XYZ = you are really cute], then follow up with "sorry I have to get back to my friend/friends, they were just too shy to come over"

 

This does something simple, it forces you to take action or lose all of your value to your friends (for most people this is not something they can allow).

 

Benefits:
1. You approach
2. You just made some girls day
3. You gain respect from your friends

 

Okay. Some quick examples and the reactions I have gotten.

 

Example 1:
Random beautiful (HB10) who looked really sad
-->sitting on a bench
"Hi, I hope I'm not intruding (as I sit next to her), I just had to let you know that you are very beautiful"

 

Reaction as I sat down: a little startled
Reaction when I finished the line: big smile "thank you"

Me: "Yeah, my friends were a bit too shy to come over here"

Her: she looks at my friends "I guess that's normal, but you came over here!"

Me: "I guess I'm a bit different" "Okay, have a great day"

 

Okay, so the usual response I get to this is that the girl will then either attempt to keep me there by asking a question OR she will let me leave.

 

I go back to my friends and hang with them...usually we move a bit but I've stayed long enough to observe her a bit later (5-10 minutes)...the deal is, the girl 99% of the time still has a smile on her because some random guy came up to her and complimented her [you would probably as well, it is nice].

 

To me it is very simple, you say something and you are sharing your positive attitude and you are giving to someone.

 

Example 2:
Situation:
--->two girls sitting and having an in depth conversation
--->out with a guy who I had just met in class and told him "asking girls out is easy"

 

Same thing as before, unwilling to lose my own value after I made such a bullshit declaration. "I'll go up to any girl and ask her out on the spot" "pick one..." [note: some dudes are annoying and will pick an ugly chick or someone who has 30 people around, lay some simple ground rules]

 

So: I walk up to the girls.

Me: "Hey, sorry to interrupt but I had to ask you a question"

Usually, get something like "oh okay" or "sure" or "uhh" (the response doesn't matter)

Me: "The guy over there doesn't agree with me that you are allowed to just walk up to a girl or girls and ask them out"

Them: "That is kinda weird" (forgot the exact words)

Me: "But sometimes you have to break the social norms, you can't just walk around staring at your phone" "So, will either of you go out with me?"

 

So in this specific case, I said I had to get back to my friend, but they kept trying to talk to me.

 

Basically, all the crap you read on here applies. Getting/giving value etc.

 

I did this about 8 years ago (LTR) so my memory is a bit fuzzy BUT I still fondly remember this shit...and since I am now "on the market" I realized that my AA is worse than ever...if you don't practice you can lose this stuff.

 

I can certainly give a ton more examples if anyone would like.

 

Or I'll edit as I start doing this again and by the way, doing something like this feels fkn awesome.