Juggling multiple girls

recyclablebanthas · 2016-06-08T12:51:28+00:00

I'm not looking for a committed relationship, just casual dating.

It's good to know what you want. Some guys don't always have that straight before they dive in. Makes things messy.

So my question is, does anyone have some good tips on how to handle a situation like this without lying? Like if girl 1 texts me asking what doing, and I'm actually spending time with girl 2... What do I say?

Couple things about this:

There are ways to cover this without lying. Omitting the part about who you're with, etc. Remember, you don't owe anyone a commitment until you have a title (BF & GF). When I'm single, I usually omit in that situation: if I'm having dinner with Girl 2 and Girl 1 texts asking what I'm doing, I'll say that I'm eating. There's no reason she needs to know more details.
Most girls won't be nosy about where you are and who you're with, not at the casual dating stage.
If you're trying to be casual, you shouldn't be going out on many dates before sex happens. You also shouldn't be engaging in PDAs like holding hands, being cutesy, and doing GF-BF type of things. This will confuse girls and make them think that you might change from casual.

That said, you should be direct about what you're about. And as far as when to have the Talk..... I agree with James Marshall.

Provided that you aren't confusing the issue by accidentally acting serious/acting like a BF right off, this Talk doesn't need to happen until after some physical stuff happens. Maybe making out, maybe sex.
The Talk should happen by the time sex has happened a few times though.
The Talk will involve telling her that you're enjoying spending time with her, you want to keep seeing her, you don't know where she's at, you want to tell her where you're at because you respect her: that you're not offering an exclusive relationship. Then you tell her something to the effect that you'll understand if she is not into that (casual dating). And that she doesn't have to make a decision right then....

MrLestat · 2016-06-08T08:08:18+00:00

It depends on each girl in particular. Whether it's a topic you want to establish or avoid, it's your choice. But be prepared to assume responsibility either way. Ultimately you will hopefully also filter girls according to this criteria.

For some girls it's a deal breaker if you see other people. Others are probably also seeing other people. You have to judge what kind of girl she is and, in a way, talk about the base assumptions. In that respect, if it's a deal breaker and you tell her you're seeing someone else, she will be right to stop seeing you (according to her beliefs). On the other hand if you don't tell her and she values honesty, you better be damn consistent with what you use to cover up.

You can always be consistent and stand your ground: with the frame "I'm busy and I can't see you later. Regardless of what I'm doing. We'll schedule a more appropriate time."

NTSpike · 2016-06-08T12:17:57+00:00

Just say you're busy, you don't need to give all the details of what you're doing. She's probably seeing other people as well. If you get the feeling she's investing in you then clear things up by clarifying you're seeing other people and you want to make sure you're both on the same page.

gngeorgiev · 2016-06-08T16:28:52+00:00

Let me tell you something from experience. Once I started dating a girl, but I was seriously in game so I was not planning on being serious with her. And I told her that I do not want a committed relationship, rather an open one. She somehow agreed at the time, however after some time(after our relationship got serious[which I will regret to the rest of my life]) she told me that she wanted to revenge me for being disrespectful towards her by telling her that I want to meet other girls. In simple words she wanted to hurt me for telling her this, but she fell in love with me and couldn't.

Now, I was really on the side of honesty here. We hooked up pretty quickly - no dates whatsoever, just one coffee and one party and after we slept together, the other day I told her about my intentions, since you know, I wanted to be an honest and decent guy and not lie to her. However after this experience I would do this: * Either not tell her that I am dating other girls if the girl has no significance to me * Do not date other girls if I want to really date only this girl

If you do not tell them that you are dating other girls then I guess they are not really significant so you can always go with "I do not have time" or "I will go out with friend(s)". You are not obliged to tell them what and with who you are gonna be doing.

justmeherointhisclub · 2016-06-08T17:34:14+00:00

if ur on a date or fuckin some other girl, ur asking what u say? u dont respond? isnt that an obvious answer?

TinkleThief · 2016-06-08T19:25:42+00:00

Based on my experience, most women I meet online are actively dating other men, and things just land in 'don't ask, don't tell' territory. This is usually a pretty standard assumption especially when you're on tinder.

If a girl is interested in you for something serious, she WILL bring up the topic with you. She will ask what you're looking for, and at this point you need to be clear that you're just into casual dating and not looking for anything serious.

You don't have to lie about what you're doing, but don't be detailed. "Having dinner with a friend" is usually enough. If she asks for specifics, then you can tell her you're going on a date. If she's got a problem with that, then a casual relationship wouldn't have worked with her anyway. Again, in my experience, most women are cool with this as long as you're honest and don't lead them on.

Title	Juggling multiple girls
Author	911noFap
Upvotes	6
Comments	17
Date	June 8, 2016 6:08 AM UTC (10 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/4n3mh7/juggling_multiple_girls/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/juggling-multiple-girls.1407865 https://theredarchive.com/post/1407865

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