normal/boring vs 'fun'/needy

witha_ph · 2016-10-06T23:47:51+00:00

Something I realised is people need to find what works for them. We all have different strengths and weaknesses. What works for one person won't necessarily work for someone else. This is why you see stuff this like this.

SunTzu111 · 2016-10-07T02:02:11+00:00

Trying to be fun is an interesting concept. Is he actually fun? Telling bad jokes is worse than telling none

I do agree that trying to make girls laugh is needy, just make her talk about herself

recyclablebanthas · 2016-10-07T03:00:11+00:00

I was reading a field report earlier and someone was getting rejected lots on their cold approaches, looking for guidance. On the forum he got 2 very different answers from 2 of the supposed 'top dogs' on the forum.

If the forum was Seddit, there's no reason to beat around the bush and be so vague: just post a link to the post.

His first few field reports were basically interview mode after the open, and the girl rejeced him after a minute or 2 He got told that he was 'boring the poor girls', so he then changed things up and tried to be fun and make the girls laugh, but they still rejected him after a few minutes, and he was told ''trying to be fun and make girls laugh comes across as needy''

This is also really vague. Maybe you're trying to summarize because you don't think people here want to read. But choking off the information doesn't help. It turns threads here into shit-shows of time-wasting speculation as people jump to different theories, many of which are rendered meaningless when the people involved actually ELABORATE on the details.

We aren't fortune tellers. Just DUMP the information here and let people go through it.

This lead to a bit of a disagreement between the 2 'top dogs' and I wondered what seddit thought the answer was. One of the guys said that his own 'game' (which he claims gets him unlimited lays) is 'boring' guy game. He just talks boring shit and stays in set long enough for him to be able to slowly escalate. He said girls don't walk away because you are boring them....

Either you're leaving some important information out or this guy was full of shit and/or exaggerating something. If you literally bore someone, you're not going to get anywhere. If he literally said he gets "unlimited lays," by being boring, he was full of shit. This isn't a video game that you can literal grind out just by not going away. There have literally been a couple posts in the last few days by guys who were sucking at conversation and the girls were shutting them down because they were bored.

but because they can sense taht you are uncomfortable. And that trying to be 'fun' (like, say sashaPUA or maybe even rsdMax?) comes across as needy and is a turn off. He says that this is what all the guys in the bar are doing and it's a turn off

Still, there's a seed of truth here. If they sense discomfort, you're more likely to fail. Trying to be fun will also turn people off.

However, Sasha (Daygame?) and RSD Max aren't "trying to be fun." They just ARE fun. They have fun. There's a difference.

The other 'expert' who also claims to get laid at will says to never be boring and ask the typical questions. That's what every loser in the bar is doing. They want someone fun who they enjoy spending time with who doesn't ask them the same usual questions. (interesting how they both think 'every other guy in the bar' is doing what the other guy suggests)

I have to wonder how much of your own bias is affecting your report of this. Did they guy literally say he gets laid "at will?" If so, he's full of shit too.

Doesn't matter if you ask "typical questions" or not. What matters is follow-up. Are you listening and digging deeper into what makes the girl tick and getting her to open up? If so, then you're going to get a good chance. Are you asking typical or special questions and then failing to dig deeper? Then you're dropping your odds by coming off like you aren't even listening to what she is saying. And yes, most guys fall into this trap.

Who do you think is right?

Neither of the portrayals you've presented sounds correct. Granted, you've left out a lot of information and filled in some gaps with your own bias so it's hard to tell how much of the ridiculousness here is due to your own spin on this.

And assuming it's the first guy, how exactly does one 'become comfortable' so that they are not giving off them negative vibes? Is it just a matter of thousands of approaches until you literally have kind of given up and jsut don't care anymore?

No. It's not grinding out thousands of potentially incorrect approaches. If you're doing it wrong, how would that help to simply do it over and over again wrong?

People make this shit complicated. It's not. Look at little kids. They meet new kids all the time on the playground. THey walk up to a kid they don't know and say hi. They introduce themselves maybe upfront or later; doesn't matter. Look. There's too much to cover about this. If you want to basics about this, check out this audio of a talk by David Wygant. He covers a lot of fundamental things.

Title	normal/boring vs 'fun'/needy
Author	treesarered
Upvotes	2
Comments	3
Date	October 6, 2016 8:30 PM UTC (9 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/567jtt/normalboring_vs_funneedy/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/normalboring-vs-funneedy.1413532 https://theredarchive.com/post/1413532

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