I had three dates recently - first one was lots of fun, expected a K close, got a hug and cheek kiss and got ghosted after. Second one was also fun with K close, but got ghosted after as well. Third one was great, ended in extended K close with public groping on a street corner, 2nd date is later today.

Just now I was thinking about these dates, and realized I was seeing the first two as failures, but I realized I can shift perspective to see them in a different way - I had a fun night of drinking, flirting and some deep convo with Girl 1, and had the same plus a nice makeout with Girl 2. Whatever happened after doesn't change the enjoyment I had during those nights.

It's making me look back on all my past hookups and relationships differently. It's so easy to fixate on what went wrong, when so, so, so much more went right with every girl, no matter how long it lasted or how far it went. Heck, even one moment of a girl smiling at you with that look of interest and attraction should be validating as heck, whether that interest lasts a moment, a day, a month, ten years or a lifetime. You got something going on, you did something right, you look good, whatever the takeaway is, it goes in the plus column. Look carefully, you've got a lot of those plusses adding up over time. Focus on them, pride yourself on them, they go on your permanent record and can't be erased. Make them the building blocks for more success as you continue to love and learn.