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TheycallhimRyan
[–]theloinsofjesus 6 years ago* [recovered] (3 children) | Copy Link
“Why are you single?” You’re such a sweet guy.” “Any woman would love to have you as a boyfriend.”
Those are just generic things chicks say.
[–]rwramire 0 points1 point2 points 6 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
True... girls aren't gonna call you a loser to your face
[–]TheycallhimRyan 1 point2 points3 points 6 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
It pisses me off and it’s frustrating!
[–]Topgun157 0 points1 point2 points 6 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
They're keeping you as an orbiter or a safe option, they like having you validate them, I would say drop em.
[–]2broke2flex 4 points5 points6 points 6 years ago (9 children) | Copy Link
Quit saying shit like I dont wamt to live anymore, get some help, if youve been with at least 3 women it means your not ugly or some shit. The only thing thats holding you back is YOU, so make that decision, stop watching porn and go outside and just talk to women your bound to gwt lucky with one.
[–]TheycallhimRyan -1 points0 points1 point 6 years ago (8 children) | Copy Link
That’s easier said than done. I’ve tried dating apps and no luck.
[–]2broke2flex 2 points3 points4 points 6 years ago (7 children) | Copy Link
Not dating apps thats all bullshit, go outside make REAL connections, and just talk to women, your probably thinking its really hard but just give no fucks and do it man
[–]TheycallhimRyan 0 points1 point2 points 6 years ago (6 children) | Copy Link
Living in a world where I don’t drink alcohol is difficult.
[–]2broke2flex 1 point2 points3 points 6 years ago (5 children) | Copy Link
Ohh I get what your saying, theres plenty of other places you can go to, a concert, the mall, the movies, I dont know. Just dont think that because you cant get laid your lifw is over, have fun and it doesnt matter if its by yourself.
[–]TheycallhimRyan 1 point2 points3 points 6 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link
Well I’m not a virgin, but at the same time, I don’t want to date a woman and have sex with them just cause. I’ve been celibate for a well over a year now.
[–]aP0THE0Sis1 1 point2 points3 points 6 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
I don’t think you need a girlfriend. You need a psychiatrist. Celibacy? What are you nuts?
[–]TheycallhimRyan 0 points1 point2 points 6 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
What I’m saying is that I don’t want to date a woman just purely for sex.
[–]aP0THE0Sis1 0 points1 point2 points 6 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Well no one does. But it doesn’t win you any points to pretend to be all pure and celibate either. It makes you look like a weirdo. Or trying to say that to win points or something. I’m sure there are other things you like so it wouldn’t lead to sex. Like looks. Looks are a valid thing to be into. Because like it or not, pretty people have an easier time in life and tend to go further. You are selecting a good mate/genes for your progeny
[–]TheycallhimRyan 0 points1 point2 points 6 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I haven’t had sex since last year in July and it was with a woman I dated for only 3 months.
[–]merlinthewizard26 1 point2 points3 points 6 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Work on yourself, the women will come and you’ll have choices. Work on your health both mentally and physically. Can’t be defeated
I’m just praying for true love in 2020.
[–]Lines01 1 point2 points3 points 6 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Okay dude we’ll you need to stop fapping and start working out
That’s easier said than done and I go to the gym 3x a week.
[–]Lines01 1 point2 points3 points 6 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link
Okay we’ll the gym isn’t distorting your view on women
[–]TheycallhimRyan 0 points1 point2 points 6 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
All I pray for in 2020 is to find true love. Living in a world where I don’t drink alcohol makes life difficult for me, because alcohol is such a huge part of social interaction.
[–]goonerguy101 0 points1 point2 points 6 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
Bro I think your biggest problem is that you are desperate and have low self esteem. Saying stuff like I pray to find a woman in 2020 sounds a bit weird and I’m sure there are plenty of guys that don’t drink and can get woman.
I have no relationship experience whatsoever and it pisses me off.
I have never been in love ever.
[–]TheycallhimRyan 0 points1 point2 points 6 years ago (17 children) | Copy Link
What fun?
[–]grrinchas 1 point2 points3 points 6 years ago (16 children) | Copy Link
I have been where you are.
You feel lonely, you never had real love, you are looking for a relationship and your inability to get that makes you depressed. Depression inhibits you of making any effort. And you start thinking about killing yourself. And it’s a viscous circle.
But contrary to you I did manage to leave that circle, by doing 500 approaches in a month. And yes, I got a girl, one then another. But the thing is that I was happy only for a couple of days, and I got bored.
You know what is the worst thing when you are reaching a goal? Is the finish line, because when you eventually reach it, you are starting for another race, and it’s just never ends.
So stop focusing on goals and just start do what makes you happy.
You sad, you want to kill yourself. And if you really feel like that, then it’s good, embrace that shit, this don’t give a fuck mentality makes you dangerous, unique and enables you to really enjoy life and be happy.
Right now I’m just working and going to start college again in the spring for on January 13th.
[–]TheycallhimRyan 0 points1 point2 points 6 years ago (14 children) | Copy Link
It feels like no matter how hard I try I can’t ever form any real relationship with any woman.
[–]grrinchas 0 points1 point2 points 6 years ago (13 children) | Copy Link
What did u tried?
[–]TheycallhimRyan 0 points1 point2 points 6 years ago (12 children) | Copy Link
The past 2 girls I’ve dated put me in the friend zone. The first woman I’ve ever dated was 17 years older than me and we dated for 10 months, but a month before she initiated the breakup through text message, she sat down and met my parents. March 10th, 2018 9:30 she told me that she didn’t genuinely love me and it was causing problems after me and her sat down with my parents. No matter how many times she told me that she loved me whenever I told her that loved her. She told me that she needed space and be single for awhile since she’s trying to put her life back together after her divorce.
[–]grrinchas 0 points1 point2 points 6 years ago (11 children) | Copy Link
You even remember the actual time of a break up. Anyway,
What did you learned from all your failed relationships, and how did you applied that to your new ones?
[–]TheycallhimRyan 0 points1 point2 points 6 years ago (9 children) | Copy Link
I learned not to get to emotionally attached to woman that aren’t emotionally unavailable. The woman I’ve dated after her, we was a just a 3 month fling. It was from June-August.
[–]grrinchas 0 points1 point2 points 6 years ago (8 children) | Copy Link
This is not learning, caused you are basing learning experience based on outcome and not on the cause. It’s like if I make a car crash due to speeding, my lesson would be “never drive a car”.
Think about the causes of failed relationships, but just from your perspective. Cause this is the only think you can change. In other words what did YOU did wrong, and not her?
[–]TheycallhimRyan 0 points1 point2 points 6 years ago (7 children) | Copy Link
I didn’t do anything wrong.
[–]grrinchas 0 points1 point2 points 6 years ago* (6 children) | Copy Link
In that case you will never have a relationship if you can’t learn from your mistakes. Sorry let’s not use this word, cause it implies you did something bad. Better to say “behaviour”. That is.
In order to improve in any kind of field, including relationship we have to reflect on our previous behaviour and change that.
It’s like driving a car. If you want to turn left but you always holding wheel straight p, you will never get where u want to go. Eventually you have to turn the wheel (change your behaviour).
[–]TheycallhimRyan1 point 6 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link
Okay I spent more time with my ex more than my friends, because I was scared that she would leave me for someone else. At the time, she was living with a guy in a apartment and it was uncomfortable for me, but at the same time I realized she couldn’t jeopardize her living arrangements just because of my insecurity. I would always text first and would always see her on my days off.
[–]grrinchas1 point 6 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link
There you go, we have lots of things we can change.
I bet that was a cause, which made her to break up with you. Cause women can’t stand clingy and insecure guys, and this behaviour is very unattractive to them. Remember, if one woman don’t like that. Then there is a very big possibility that another woman won’t like this behaviour as well. So if you continue doing that you have very small chance to find a women who actually like this. Therefore, you have to change that.
There are two ways:
1) don’t be insecure. You can do that if you have abundance of women. When you have lots of women to choose from, you don’t care about if you loose any of them, cause you know that you will be able to get more. This is preferred way, but it’s harder to accomplish.
2) be insecure, but pretend that you are not. That is, as much as you want don’t show any clingy behaviour, act like you don’t care. This is the only way to find first women and first relationship, when you find one, then go to option one, and have more women. Then you won’t need to pretend anymore.
Not only just that but also that age gap was very significant. I was 22 and she was 39 at the time.
Interesting, my first gf was 17years older than me as well. But it was totally opposite. She was the clingy one, so I broke up with her.
I just want to stop feeling this pain.
My parents and my older brother are in relationships except for me.
The third a last woman I dated, we only went on one date and would keep on flaking plans until 2 weeks later she told me she was going through debt issues and since then I haven’t dated anyone.
[–]GirlsnGame 0 points1 point2 points 6 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
You're in a vicious cycle. Lonely, depressed, apathetic. You should tell your doctor, get counselling and deal with this. Your depression isn't a result of your bad dating life, it's the cause of it. You need to love being yourself before any woman will.
Good luck bro. Get help.
Idk what to do anymore. Maybe I’m pursuing the wrong women.
I’m 24 years old and still live my dad. I just pisses me off how my parents are in relationships and I still haven’t found anyone yet. My brother is in a 4 year relationship as well.
[–]loki___himself 0 points1 point2 points 6 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
That’s an insult.
What?
What is an insult?
[–]RockodileFundee -1 points0 points1 point 6 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Just pray to Jesus my dude
[–]grrinchas -2 points-1 points0 points 6 years ago* (3 children) | Copy Link
Same boat man.
And the problem that no PUA stuff will help you. You can stop jerking off and can fuck as many women you want, eventually you will start to fantasise about porn, and you will relapse. I don’t think there is a cure...
[–]TheycallhimRyan -2 points-1 points0 points 6 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
I don’t want to live and anymore.
[–]grrinchas 1 point2 points3 points 6 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
That’s good, because now you don’t have anything to loose. And this is where the real fun starts.
[–]TheycallhimRyan -2 points-1 points0 points 6 years ago (16 children) | Copy Link
All I want is true love.
[–]Sikkas 1 point2 points3 points 6 years ago (14 children) | Copy Link
I'm 36 and got married almost 3 years ago. You area still young man! If you feel desperate then start changing everything about yourself and see how that goes. The only thing stopping you is yourself
[–]TheycallhimRyan 0 points1 point2 points 6 years ago (13 children) | Copy Link
I’ve tried many ways of trying to approach women. I don’t drink, smoke, or do drugs. I’m a clean person. On my spare time I like to play video games, bowling and rock climbing.
[–]Sikkas 0 points1 point2 points 6 years ago (12 children) | Copy Link
Sikkas
From those I'd say rock climbing is the best place to find women. I found it quite hard to pick up women when I was totally sober like you are now. Also I did need to learn to get rid of my inhibtions which I needed for alcohol before. Now I can be social and funny sober or drunk. If someone does't laugh at my jokes I don't give a damn.
I don't know what you struggle with right now so much. Is it anxiety or fear of approaching? The more you keep approaching women (in real life! Don't waste your time on apps or online) the easier it gets. You'll learn to move on after being rejected.
I’m just tired of being led on a rejected.
[–]Sikkas 0 points1 point2 points 6 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
You can't change the world or what people say or do to you. What you have control of is your own reactions and mind. You are not your feelings. Judging from your post history I think you really should consider going to a therapist or just find someone to talk to. But before that I'd recommend looking in to meditation and mindfullness stuff. Listen to Alan Watts or whatever works for you.
I hope all the best for you stranger. Seems like you are in a very similar situation than I was 12 years ago. Things will get better. You just have to go out there and not shut yourself off. A new year is just around the corner. Might feel like a dreadful thing if you are really feeling down. But try to see it as a new chance. Make a plan for 2020. Set goals and keep a track of your progress.
I just pray to find true love in 2020.
True love: To feel loved, missed, someone that is proud to have me.
Living in a world where someone like me that doesn’t drink alcohol makes dating hard.
[–]Sikkas 0 points1 point2 points 6 years ago (6 children) | Copy Link
I'm from Finland and was dating for a long time totally sober. You just have to find your way. Be proud not to take part in that and say it. Don't look down on people who drink though. One thing to try is to say you a free from using substances. Instead of using a negative term "don't".
[–]TheycallhimRyan 0 points1 point2 points 6 years ago (5 children) | Copy Link
Alcohol plays a big part in social interaction in society. Even if I were lucky to meet a woman at bar the embarrassment of telling her I don’t drink would be catastrophic.
[–]Sikkas 0 points1 point2 points 6 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link
Well I'm a living proof of the opposite. You really should stop putting these walls around you. Who even said all pickups need to happen in a bar? Search from daygame on this subreddit
I honestly don’t know of any other places to meet people. All I do on my free time is go to the gym, play video games, and sometimes rock climbing and bowling.
Sikka
Coffee places, supermarkets and just the streets. Start a conversation and keep it going. If you fail then move on to the next one. Really you should check out all kinds of material titled 'daygame'.
Where can I find it?
[–]Sikkas1 point 6 years ago [recovered] | Copy Link
Just use the search man. Or search in Youtube for daygame.
[–]TheycallhimRyan -3 points-2 points-1 points 6 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
I don’t want to live anymore.
[–]Ribmaz 3 points4 points5 points 6 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Ring the Samaritans
[–]HanEyeAm 3 points4 points5 points 6 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Given your Reddit post history, I think you'd benefit from psychotherapy. Not for porn addiction per se, but for moving yourself in the direction you want in life. Best wishes!
[–]HanEyeAm 2 points3 points4 points 6 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
National Suicide Prevention Lifeline
We can all help prevent suicide. The Lifeline provides 24/7, free and confidential support for people in distress, prevention and crisis resources for you or your loved ones, and best practices for professionals.
1-800-273-8255
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[–]theloinsofjesus [recovered] (3 children) | Copy Link
[–]rwramire 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]TheycallhimRyan 1 point2 points3 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]Topgun157 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]2broke2flex 4 points5 points6 points (9 children) | Copy Link
[–]TheycallhimRyan -1 points0 points1 point (8 children) | Copy Link
[–]2broke2flex 2 points3 points4 points (7 children) | Copy Link
[–]TheycallhimRyan 0 points1 point2 points (6 children) | Copy Link
[–]2broke2flex 1 point2 points3 points (5 children) | Copy Link
[–]TheycallhimRyan 1 point2 points3 points (4 children) | Copy Link
[–]aP0THE0Sis1 1 point2 points3 points (3 children) | Copy Link
[–]TheycallhimRyan 0 points1 point2 points (2 children) | Copy Link
[–]aP0THE0Sis1 0 points1 point2 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]TheycallhimRyan 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]merlinthewizard26 1 point2 points3 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]TheycallhimRyan 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]Lines01 1 point2 points3 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]TheycallhimRyan 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]Lines01 1 point2 points3 points (4 children) | Copy Link
[–]TheycallhimRyan 0 points1 point2 points (3 children) | Copy Link
[–]goonerguy101 0 points1 point2 points (2 children) | Copy Link
[–]TheycallhimRyan 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]TheycallhimRyan 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]TheycallhimRyan 0 points1 point2 points (17 children) | Copy Link
[–]grrinchas 1 point2 points3 points (16 children) | Copy Link
[–]TheycallhimRyan 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]TheycallhimRyan 0 points1 point2 points (14 children) | Copy Link
[–]grrinchas 0 points1 point2 points (13 children) | Copy Link
[–]TheycallhimRyan 0 points1 point2 points (12 children) | Copy Link
[–]grrinchas 0 points1 point2 points (11 children) | Copy Link
[–]TheycallhimRyan 0 points1 point2 points (9 children) | Copy Link
[–]grrinchas 0 points1 point2 points (8 children) | Copy Link
[–]TheycallhimRyan 0 points1 point2 points (7 children) | Copy Link
[–]grrinchas 0 points1 point2 points (6 children) | Copy Link
[–]TheycallhimRyan1 point [recovered] | Copy Link
[–]grrinchas1 point [recovered] | Copy Link
[–]TheycallhimRyan1 point [recovered] | Copy Link
[–]grrinchas1 point [recovered] | Copy Link
[–]TheycallhimRyan1 point [recovered] | Copy Link
[–]TheycallhimRyan1 point [recovered] | Copy Link
[–]TheycallhimRyan 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]GirlsnGame 0 points1 point2 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]TheycallhimRyan 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]TheycallhimRyan 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]loki___himself 0 points1 point2 points (2 children) | Copy Link
[–]TheycallhimRyan 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]TheycallhimRyan 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]RockodileFundee -1 points0 points1 point (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]grrinchas -2 points-1 points0 points (3 children) | Copy Link
[–]TheycallhimRyan -2 points-1 points0 points (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]grrinchas 1 point2 points3 points (0 children) | Copy Link
[–]TheycallhimRyan -2 points-1 points0 points (16 children) | Copy Link
[–]Sikkas 1 point2 points3 points (14 children) | Copy Link
[–]TheycallhimRyan 0 points1 point2 points (13 children) | Copy Link
[–]Sikkas 0 points1 point2 points (12 children) | Copy Link
[–]TheycallhimRyan 0 points1 point2 points (3 children) | Copy Link
[–]Sikkas 0 points1 point2 points (2 children) | Copy Link
[–]TheycallhimRyan 0 points1 point2 points (0 children) | Copy Link
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[–]TheycallhimRyan 0 points1 point2 points (7 children) | Copy Link
[–]Sikkas 0 points1 point2 points (6 children) | Copy Link
[–]TheycallhimRyan 0 points1 point2 points (5 children) | Copy Link
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[–]TheycallhimRyan 0 points1 point2 points (3 children) | Copy Link
[–]Sikkas 0 points1 point2 points (2 children) | Copy Link
[–]TheycallhimRyan1 point [recovered] | Copy Link
[–]Sikkas1 point [recovered] | Copy Link
[–]TheycallhimRyan -3 points-2 points-1 points (3 children) | Copy Link
[–]Ribmaz 3 points4 points5 points (0 children) | Copy Link
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