I FINALLY got a date out of a dating app.

There were a lot of positive things about it. I have a lot in common with the girl. We are both non-drinkers and agreed with each other on a lot of things, like where we met to eat.

We had a nice time at a sit down burger place and then played UNO at a boba milk tea joint.

That being said, I feel like I noticed her attraction and enthusiasm wane towards the end. I'm not sure what caused that, and I'm treading carefuly as I revisit the date in my mind as I dont wantto re-ignite insecurities and negative beliefs abut myself that I have conquered recently.

I know its just part of life and it is something I have to face.

I didnt do any major screw ups. I think where I might have messed up is along these lines:

  • I said too much. (sometimes if I'm a little nervous, instead of going quiet, I try and fill in the gaps in the conversation) I also think I may have cut her off once or twice.

  • I said stuff I didnt need to, at least on a first date. I eventually mentioned that I used to a drug problem, though I am 4 years sober. I have a feeling that wasnt a shocker for her. She said her ex did cocaine. Either way, as soon as the words left my mouth I started to feel like it was a mistake. The reason I think I brought this up is because it actually was a major event in my life and I am proud of myself for what I accomplished. Still, I think going forward I'm going to save that story for later dates.

  • Little humor. I have a hard time with jokes and being light hearted. Unless I know someone really well and trust them, I kind of box up that part of my personality. This is something I want to work on.

As a side note, I really dread dates and things like that becoming like a job interview. I hate that.

Now that that is out of the way, I think I did well in other areas. I'm certainly more calm than I have ever been. I had great eye contact and smiles. I was able to avoid any awkward silence and we had solid conversation the whole way through.