Say you've met someone in a recurring social setting. You meet them as friends, find them attractive, but want things to work out in some capacity. Preferably intimately.

A lot of guys will take this slow, build a connection, and hope she will fall for him or things will fall into place for them to ask her out. They'll do this cause they really like the girl and don't want to make things weird or ruin whatever relationship theyve been investing into.

Here's my take on this; As soon as you realize you're attracted, send it. Ask her out in some way. Put the intentions out there. I say this for a few reasons.

If you spend a long time getting to know this person and invest emotionally, it's going to hurt if things don't work out. Youre not gonna want to see her with other guys or one/both of you may feel betrayed in some way. You not be able to continue being in the same vicinity or friend group. If you value being able to get along or even maintaining a friendship in a reoccurring setting, this is way easier if you air out the intentions early and move from there. If it works out, great! You saved a ton of time and energy. You also don't risk being put in the friend zone or her feeling misled about your intentions with her down the line.

If it doesn't work out, don't be weird about it and keep talking as normal. You won't be too hurt and she'll be more comfortable around you because you're comfortable. Her knowing you liked her will make things more genuine anyway. By this point you move on. Stop investing. You shouldnt be waiting and hoping something will happen. Accept the rejection. The ball is in her court if things ever progress further but don't have any expectations. Kind of like a surprise snow day if something happens.

In summary, make your interest known as soon as you realize it and ask her out. It's a win win in all scenarios as long as you don't take the rejection personally, detach from the outcome, and keep socializing as if it doesn't matter (it doesnt)

Its liberating to know things will always work out going for what you want when you want it in this area of life.

Curious to hear your thoughts. Do you think this could poison the well in friend groups? From my perception, no; If anything, I see being received with respect. Do you see any other issues or weaknesses with this philosophy that I may have overlooked?