This is called this because I don’t to go in-field and forget everything, I go instantly into my head and it all becomes very scattered and unstructured. So I should check the “focus for next”-list right before I go out next time!

 

Was again planning to do proper warm-up with asking 5 people for directions within 5-10 minutes, which is surprisingly HARD for me! When I get in flow/momentum/state, I can run around and stop chicks and be more loud, and be funny and kinda clown-ish (not good, but it’s a more IDGAF-attitude I like.) - and this is why I want to do a proper warm-up, to quickly get over it, instead of spending an half-assed hour on gaining momentum!

I asked two women for directions, and when I do one I think “no, I can’t ask another one right away, people around me will think I’m weird, someone I know will see me, bladiblablabla..” - I would be FINE with meeting someone I knew and they saw me and asked what: “It’s a comfort zone thing, I’m reducing my anxiety.” - Point being, do the proper warm-up next time, no excuses, QUICKLY. Then I spot two cute girls walking past me and really holding eye contact, and I’m like FUCK, “it’s my warm-up time” - but the next girl is saw was really stunning, and I stopped her - This is a good win and big progress for me, as I tend to ignore/avoid girls I really find attractive to my “taste”, my other sets are cute enough, but really, mostly they're for practice.

 

First direct; Really cute, curly-haired brunette The interaction-audio doesn’t capture the tension thru closeness and eye contact, she had really pretty eye (and face and body), and I felt a connection - kinda like it was “on” already. I’m still not happy about my voice projection, but I’m working on it, it’s too “permission-boy”. I think I should’ve flirted some more at the beginning, do some cold-read probably, but it was okay, it was a longer interaction so I managed to spike here and there, but only with non-sexual jokes - so I should tease more sexually. And then I need to get better at rapport, just normal conversation, I notice their not so comfortable talking, I could ease up more on that. She was qualifying to me, this hardly happens, so I guess I’m improving, she said: I hold silence “.. I know it probably sounds kinda lame, but, yeah.. hehe… That’s my life, hehe..” - I then closed kinda weak, but I did it. When I said bye it was this moment of checking each other out as we walked away from eachother slowly, it was nice, and it feels good to see positive results once in a while.

Good:

  • I went for it, even when feeling like a nervous wreck! And also she was REALLY cute!
  • Held silence a bit after she spoke, noticed she tried to fill in gaps, staying - me realizing the "hook"
  • Texted her soon after a while, and asked to meetup right there, cause I thought she had a free half-hour, I should’ve done this in-set, but my “bad habits” and shit make me “forget”.

Not so good:

  • I was not so confident, “going with the flow”, and being a leaf in the wind responding kinda impressed by things she said, because I liked her and prob wanted approval and shit
  • Closed weak: The convo died out, it was when we touched upon religion, she was a catholic, and I know you should avoid heavy topics (keep it light), but I wasn’t aware of this in-set. I notice her about to say she has to go, then my automatic response was taking her, and holding it: “What do you say to.. maybe meet again sooner one time?” - “We’ll probably meet some place another time.” - “I doubt it.” - “Why not?” - (this is good tho) “Let me take your number, and then we’ll see.” - “Hehe, okay."
  • Should find out what these girls are doing then and there, and if they have time later on the day for an instant-date, or a pretty-fucking-soon-date :D

Lessons:

  • State of transference; when I’m closing weak it’s shows I’m unsure of myself, then she than mirrors this back to me. When I put on some bigger pants and said: “I’ll take your number.” she then responded positively, like she was thinking “yes, he pushed thru and lead me so I can follow."

Improve:

  • Just go in, and open strong, be your best self, go for the win, go for the date right there, actually play to win, it’s more fun!
  • You’re putting these girls way to high in value, you’re a cool dude, awesome guy, have shit going for you, you’re not doing yourself a favour gloryfying these girls - It feels awesome yeah to get good reactions, but it’s you and only you that’s the important thing here, being yourself, expressing, going for what you want, taking right action.

 

I got really hyped about this convo and sadly lost momentum cause I was (stupidly) bragging about it with a wing I soon met-up with, then we walked and talked - and THIS is where I have to keep up momentum! My wing open one girl, then I just ask a dude for directions to get up some momentum. Right after I talk to ANYONE, cold approach, direct or indirect, I feel good, better, more safe, so keep it up, do more and more quickly RIGHT AWAY - stop wasting time! I then text a bit back and forth with the girl I closed. She couldn’t meet-up with me, so now I’m wondering if I should text later this night or tomorrow and ask again. Me and my wing do some pushups at an outside place with lots of bars, feels good to just explore new places and fuck around a bit - this shit SHOULD be fun!

 

Two-set I then change wings, hehe, and we quite fast do time-challenges, which is good. He pushes me on a two-set, and I give them both a compliment and they liked it, then I mumble so they misheard, then it’s a short silence and I feel high anxiety and don’t know what to do or say, then I eject. Become better at just spitballling shit, chitchatting, making good rapport - I think my conversational skills could get a lot better. Especially with the sets I don’t “feel for”, I should be able to have a nice fun conversation with no agenda.

 

I barely see anyone daygaming, and I saw one guy getting the number, and I went close behind him to listen, and I couldn’t hear SHIT, he was talking REALLY low (like a bitch, more than me, I thought) - So I saw that there was something about him that was just “cool” - he just obviously “demanded presence” from the girl, he was just himself - I should’ve talked to him afterwards, which is what I usually do when I spot the oh so rare daygamer in the streets..

 

Indirect girl with yellow backpack

When I’m sitting here I think of these creative things I could say (typical), but it’s not that, it’s just I’m sitting here at home writing, being COMFORTABLE and FEELING SAFE - If I can emulate this infield, which I have done succesfully before, then it would be awesome - instead of feeling like a nervous wreck trying to leech value and positivity - BE the one who’s giving that!

I didn’t know if direct would be appropriate as she was standing facing the wall and reading some text, so I went: “What’s the deal here?” - So weak, I SHOULD’VE gone direct. After she answered me she walked two steps past me and then I didn’t know how to take it further, she also didn’t know my intentions.

 

Another directions-set, on a time-challenge (open anyone)

This is because I fail to keep up my direct-momentum and let the anxiety build up high. It didn’t feel good enough so I opened another girl right after and went direct

 

Random direct-set girl

Says this is a bit random, gave her compliment, she says thanks, I introduce myself, she says Amalie, I say “oh, like the movie!” - “yeah, like the movie :)” - she says she’s late for work, then I hold her hand and say then you can wait just 5 more minutes, “No, I can’t!” she says, goodbye.

Improve: Should’ve could’ve walked with and chatted, do this more dude! Get more face/chat-time with girls, NOT with your wing! Good: I persisted a bit for her to stay and talk, instead of just immidiately puss out and say ok, bye.

 

Fitness girl

Direct compliment. I can hear that I didn’t catch it in-set that she said “yeah, and I can do splits as well.” - I was too in my head, calculating shit to say/do - SO IMPROVE, BE PRESENT, THAT IS THE BEST! When she’s about to go, keep her put, or walk with her a bit, and chat some more, FLIRT, go for the close anyway!

Improve:

  • Be more present, feel your body, focus on breath - step away from thoughts, they’re not helping
  • Mindset should be: "I talked to you cause I think you’re attractive and wouldn’t mind fucking you, and perhaps getting to know you, I’m skeptical of you being cool, but I’m gonna try find out, and you’re gonna have a more fun and positive experience by meeting/talking to me."

 

Girl with headset and white/purple-colored hair I frightened her a bit, and said sorry then gave direct compliment. Quite fast and when she was going to say bye, I was going to suggest staying a bit (I should just keep talking for that suggestions instead), but then I just stopped and gave up, said: “yeah.. okay. bye”

Improve: Obviously I should’ve been more fun, kept talking, or walk-with.

 

I note my tone and personality with my wing, and it’s totally different, from quite natural to constricted and careful when talking to girls.

 

Another fitness-tights girl (those are sexy) Better convo, we have fun, good rapport, she has a boyfriend but I closed anyway - GOOD!

Improve: Talking about shit YOU like and find interesting, instead going with the flow of the convo and what SHE says - YOU LEAD, YOU DICTATE.

Mindset:

  • I’m a fucking badass! I wont get head over heels just because you’re attractive - Prove yourself to me, show me you’re fun/cool as well! - Instead of my chody-shit at the moment, prob unconscious: “I’m unsure of myself, these girls are so hot, I hope I can sleep with them, I hope they like me." I then go home, and as often TRY to do one solo on the way home, but fail to. But overall good day.

 

OVERALL

Improvement points:

  • Try this follow-up, RIGHT AFTER OPEN, "So, I think.. (Example:) You've just been to the gym, You're the creative type, You're the good girl type, You have a real classy walk, etc"
    • This will kinda force me to be the one who's talking more at the beginning with some cold-read or just a statement of I see/think/feel this anout you.
  • Once again, keep it in mind, go for an instant-date
  • Keep momentum up, have an internal watch, when you walk past quarters and blocks of time with your wing and mot opening, this is not good - Ideally I want one hour of effective daygame instead of haøf assing 2-4 hours
  • Maybe try gaming for maximum an hour, and do your best within that time-limit!
  • BE MORE YOURSELF - You get approval from yourself, don’t need the girl’s! Crack jokes YOU like, say things YOU enjoy, ask things you GENUINLY are curios about.

 

Mindset:

  • I am looking to find if you're cool too, so maybe we can share some fun times
    • On my last 2 sets I noticed while I had this mindset in mind, that I automatically was more "demanding presence/attention", better open, more challenging and skeptical (screening)
  • Put on the big boy pants (stop being a “permission boy”) - Assertive, confident, commanding, dictating, leading, self-amused, free-of-outcome!
    • I’m noticing gradually as I’ve been really active the last two weeks that just by doing outer game, my inner game world becomes stronger and stronger - I has to! I don’t wanna go around doing nothing, and when I finally DO talk to chicks I get sick of my weak approach, then I say to myself, man up, do it, demand presence from them, and it fucking works.

 

Good:

  • I tried closing this sportswear-girl with a boyfriend, she then refused and I joked about him making us breakfast, while holding her hand until she pulled back after a while
  • Holding the girls hand when saying hello, and holding it longer past the first time they try and pull back
  • I FINALLY opened a girl I found really attractive, instead of avoiding!
  • Texted the girl soon after for statement about interaction ".. cool and random to meet you" - then she answered back which is a good sign, and I asked for instant-date, realizing I failed to ask her then and there but logistics were there.
  • I decided my sets were too short, I was too weak in both opening on holding them (demanding presence) - I could also choose to walk-with - But, just had this mindset that I would make them stay longer, and they did, my body language and voice projection probably showed it.

 

Focus on next time (read this right before going out!):

  • Try follow-up: “So, I think..” - Just quickly say it, and you savvy fuck will come up with something in the moment - trust!
  • Try going for instant-dates on every girl, screen for her (time) logistics for it!
  • Try one BLOWOUT-set, talk to a girl you find attractive, and make a fool out of yourself, PROVING to yourself it’s okay to be yourself, and YOU DON’T NEED ANY PARTICULAR GIRL - say kinda outrageous things - just try it!
  • Maybe focus on when going in “it’s OKAY if she rejects me, i’d be fine with it, it would actually be funny!"