I recently sat down with a girl that I'd been casually hooking up with, to tell her that I wasn't comfortable just having casual sex with her. I basically told her that I didn't feel like I allowed myself to be emotionally vulnerable around her - eventhough I think I should have.

We initially both agreed when we started hooking up, that neither of us wanted a relationship. She was rather uncomfortable when I brought it up. However, she also told me on multiple occasions while in bed together, that she didn't just hook up with guys. When I opened up to her about how I felt, and what I was after, she couldn't really explain the inconsistency of (1) not wanting a relationship, but also (2) not casually having sex with people.

I feel really good about finally opening up and setting up my boundaries. Wondering what the best thing for me to do is now, apart from give her space, and allow her to either avoid me and her issues, or approach me and tell me whether she wants us to continue seeing each other, but on a more meaningful level.

The experience was great, regardless of whether I get rejected. Kinda helped me realise that I've been using pickup and my apparent lack of fear of rejection, to cover up for my inability to make myself emotionally vulnerable around women.

This has been the biggest breakthrough for me, since becoming comfortable enough with myself to approach anyone.