So how does one become less needy?

marthdotsk · 2017-07-07T13:07:04+00:00

One becomes less needy by shifting where they sate their hunger for validation.

Needy people will seek it from others. Their focus will be on external validation.

Confident people will be sated by their own self-validation, and won't require any from an external source. Their focus will be on internal validation.

Examples of external validation focus: being a people pleaser, caring about what "that one girl" thinks of you, caring about what women in general think of you, caring about what people in general think of you, believing a romantic partner is "your other half", craving recognition at work, conforming to your circle of friends' general "hivemind" train of thought, believing without questionning, displaying arrogance, being a dick, victim mentality, narcissism, scarcity mentality, etc.

Examples of internal validation focus: living for yourself first and foremost, not basing your happiness on other people's opinion of you, believing romantic partners should complement one another rather than be codependant, refusing to be a victim, taking action when shit hits the fan to make the most out of it, creating your own opportunities to take, enjoying the journey as much as the destination, exerting power by restraint of said power, focusing on healthy win-win scenarios, being outcome-independant, abundance mentality, etc.

kalolilo · 2017-07-07T12:02:11+00:00

For each situation, ask yourself "would this be needy" and if so, not doing it. However, value offering persistence is not needy.
Have abundance, so that you don't even have time to be needy

Title	So how does one become less needy?
Author	upandup123
Upvotes	3
Comments	2
Date	July 7, 2017 10:55 AM UTC (9 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/6lswfc/so_how_does_one_become_less_needy/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/so-how-does-one-become-less-needy.1430056 https://theredarchive.com/post/1430056

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