I went to a nightclub this weekend for the first time since the pandemic started and it was nice to see it busy. Whether you like it or not nightclubs are still the best place in my opinion to meet people to flirt with and hook up.

I used to be a complete nerd when I was young but nightclubs helped me mature as a person and taught me how to be sociable and how to meet and pick-up girls. Here are some tips that I learnt from my experiences:

  1. Start working out. Don’t train at home but go to a gym—preferably one that is more like a health spa instead of a meathead, spit and sawdust type place. Set yourself a goal to have a great physique in six months time. Go three times a week.

  2. Pick a music scene. It can be anything but it must be something that moves you. Nothing gangster or druggie. Listen to that music as you work out. Learn it. Learn to dance to it at home in private in front of the mirror and use YouTube videos to help you. You don’t have to become an expert, you’re not John Travolta, just learn enough to be able to move with confidence on a dancefloor and not embarrass yourself.

  3. You’re going to embarrass yourself. A lot. Learn that it doesn’t matter. It’s part of developing as a person. Develop the mindset that some people are going to think you’re a dick but at the end of the night you’re the guy who’s going to be going home with the chicks. But also don’t be a dick.

  4. Get a cool hair cut. Buy some cool clothes. Don’t know what’s cool? Look at fashion websites, and visit high-end department stores to get ideas. Shop in hipster markets, don’t blow your money on expensive designer clothes, you’re going to need that cash for later.

  5. Find a drink that is easy to consume, makes you merry but doesn’t get you so drunk that you cannot function. Forget expensive brandies, whiskeys or wines—you want a drink that can be ordered quickly, held in your hand as you move around and is refreshing and easy to drink. A little alcohol helps loosen inhibitions. A lot of alcohol can ruin your night. Popular nightclub drinks involve vodka—usually with soda or tonic. They help you reach the desired effect of being merry without blowing your brains out. Beer is not an option, it makes you look bloated and is something you’d drink when out with the lads not when you’re out clubbing and picking up girls. Avoid doing shots.

  6. Try out a few nightclubs. Go on your own or with a likeminded friend. Avoid going in large groups of guys—the chances are you won’t get in. Practice your dance moves there. Personally I’ve always found the clubs that play cheesy music are the easiest places to pick-up girls. Try talking to girls at the bar. You’re going to get rejected. Don’t take it personally. Be confident and witty. Be a good time to be around. Don’t be a creep. In my experience clubs around a specific niche music scene or clubs full of gangs of men are not good places to meet girls. Clubs with table service are a waste of time and money.

  7. Find a nightclub that works for you. What I mean is that you can get in every week without difficulty, the prices aren’t going to bankrupt you, it’s buzzing every week and full of girls going to party. Go there every week. Befriend the door staff, the cloakroom and bar staff. Learn and remember their names. Be happy to see them every week. I’ve always found that once you become a regular at a club then people get to know you and it becomes easier to connect with girls. You’re now starting to develop your clubbing persona - the person you become at the weekend and who is going out to have fun. Enjoy it.

  8. Enjoy yourself. Having a good time is infectious. Don’t drink too much. Don’t take drugs. Don’t be a pest. Respect peoples boundaries but also respect yourself. Keep going to the gym. Keep practicing those dance moves. Keep practicing those approach routines.

  9. Stop using the internet to kill time. Cut out social media. Go out instead during the week in your downtime to trendy coffee shops, galleries, museums, anything to better yourself culturally and to learn to be comfortable around people. Use this newfound confidence to improve your image when you’re out at the weekends in the clubs. Invite girls that you connect with in the nightclubs to join you on these cultural pursuits.

  10. By now you’re going to start having success. You’re going out every week having the time of your life. You’re improving as a person. You’re hooking up with girls. It becomes almost like a routine. You can mix it up by trying out other clubs where people don’t know you or you can keep to the routine that works for you if it keeps you happy. You will be forming new friends and creating a little black book of girls you can call to hang out with.

Have the best time of your life.