Texting before hangout?

hunterpua · 2026-02-12T15:25:30+00:00

Its fine. You can text her.

If someone runs out of things to talk about just because they have a little conversation via text then the problem isn't texting, it's that they suck at having conversations.

Assuming everyone involved is an adult, you have at least 18 years each of life experience to talk about. Not to mention, an infinite well to pull from if you know what you're doing. More on that in a bit.

Let me give you some tips in case you're worried that you won't have much to talk about on a date:

The present is where conversations go to die

Its better to focus your conversation on the past and the future.

I might get some guys who have benefitted from mindfulness misunderstanding this. So to clarify, talking about the past or the future is different to not being in the moment.

If you look at your text conversations with your friends they'll either be talking about plans for later this week or something that happened recently, they won't be talking about what's happening right now.

And you might even have some conversations reminiscing about things that happened years ago.

As long as you're actually listening when you're talking to her, not just pretending to while trying to come up with the next thing or getting distracted with something else entirely then you are in the moment.

With that out of the way, the reason it's better to focus on the past is again because you have around 20 years of life experience each to go into, and you can go into any of that, from 20 years ago to 20 minutes ago.

The future is even better, because it's infinite, because it hasn't happened yet. And you can also talk about anything from 5 minutes later to 5 years later.

I remember one time from my childhood, we went on a family trip and me and my brother slept on an extra mattress on the floor of the hotel room we stayed at and we ended up spending the whole night talking about what we would like to do when we grew up.

See? I just used my past to illustrate how much conversation you can get out of talking about the future.

From there, you could ask me about my relationship with my brother, what that trip was like, how that conversation with him matches up to my actual adulthood, if anything has changed since then, what I dream of now, etc etc, or you could share things from your life that relates to any of that.

And you can do those exact same things with a girl you're flirting with.

Speaking of flirting, I've noticed this needs to be said on this sub: Flirting is not topic dependent.

You don't need to go into specific topics to flirt with someone, you can turn damn near any topic flirty, even a technical conversation about her work can be made flirty if you drop in lines like, "Not gonna lie, I think organized girls are kinda sexy."

You don't even need to talk to flirt. You can be talking about the weather while you look at her from one eye, to the other, to her lips, and smirk at her.

So to conclude, avoiding a text conversation before a date is a very short term, band aid solution to a bigger problem - being bad at conversation.

Fix the real problem and you don't need to stress at all about texting girls before dates, and one of the ways to improve your conversations is to keep them focused on topics about the past or future.

And remember, flirting isn't topic dependent. As long as you don't go into really heavy topics like politics, religion, or seriously shitty experiences, you can flirt with her.

ImpossibleWaiting · 2026-02-12T14:57:17+00:00

Texting before meet up can be used to hook her, have fun and heating up the conversation like putting pictures of you pushing her to the wall and biting her neck. If you do it in a tasteful way, you're going to have good success converting those meet ups into bringing her home and having long make out sessions or sex.

somethinlikeshieva · 2026-02-12T14:40:06+00:00

You can say "if we text so much before meeting, well have nothing to talk about in person"

I tend to try and meet asap but it seems lately chicks like to play games for the free attention. It's so lame

Title	Texting before hangout?
Author	Delllthrow
Upvotes	1
Comments	7
Date	February 12, 2026 2:20 PM UTC (5 months ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/1r2unlm/texting_before_hangout/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/texting-before-hangout.1573317 https://theredarchive.com/post/1573317

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